“That’s nice of you to say, but giving me free rent and worrying along with me over Eddie’s excursions across the fence are enough for now. Besides, I’ll be on my feet soon. I hope.”
Jodie came over and gave her a hug. Kate felt like throwing her arms around her sister-in-law and sobbing into her shoulder. But she wouldn’t. Jodie was too kindhearted, and Kate knew her melancholy was temporary. Or at least she hoped it was.
She pulled back and sniffed. “I’m sorry. I’m just down right now. I…I’m obviously not doing something right. Sometimes, especially when I spend a little too much time alone thinking, I wonder if I’m doing anything right.”
“Of course you are! We all love you. And Eddie is a great kid, even if he is a little too adventurous at times.”
“He is a great kid, but I wonder how much is my doing. I mean, I married the wrong man, allowed him to take care of me financially if not emotionally, and closed my eyes to both his unscrupulous investment decisions and his philandering. I’ve never worked outside the home, never even considered that I needed credit in my own name. I was blind and dumb to my lying, cheating husband until everything in my ‘perfect’ world came tumbling down.”
“You’re being way too hard on yourself.”
Kate shook her head. “It’s all true. And now I’m responsible for everything—Eddie’s health and welfare, his education and development. I need to run a household on almost no money, because about all I can do is substitute teach until I get a permanent job.” Kate sniffed again. “I’m sorry, Jodie. I’m just having a little pity party down here in the laundry room. I didn’t mean to burden you.”
“We keep telling you it’s no burden. We love you, Kate. We’ve never used the garage apartment, so you’re welcome to stay as long as you’d like, until you and Eddie get tired of us and want to move away.”
Kate attempted a shaky smile. “You’re too nice.”
In a moment of brash confidence, she’d decided not to take any more handouts from her oil-wealthy father and successful architect brother. She’d taken enough “handouts” from Ed without considering the consequences. No, she needed to succeed on her own merits, as much as possible, as long as Eddie’s health or happiness wasn’t compromised. Living rent-free over Travis’s garage in a nice but small apartment helped tremendously, even though the few pieces of heirloom furniture she’d managed to keep after the estate sale seemed lonely and sad against the stark white walls and light wood flooring.
“It’s just that I’ve always thought of myself as a homemaker and a mother, not a sole provider,” she explained to Jodie. “Although I know how important it is to be independent, sometimes I feel that I can’t do this alone.”
“Yes, you can.” Jodie gave Kate a fierce hug. “Besides, you’re not alone. You have us, for better or for worse. And everyone in town loves you.”
Kate nodded even as she thought of one person who wasn’t so fond of her inquisitive son—their neighbor Luke Simon. Still, she hugged Jodie back and felt better now that she’d expressed her fears. She wasn’t a wimp. She would get a job and she would be strong for Eddie.
“Okay, I’ll leave you alone with the laundry. I just came down to tell you that we’re going into town. Travis needs to stop by the hardware store, then we’re joining Hank and Gwendolyn for an early dinner at Bretford House. We’d love for you and Eddie to join us.”
“I’m not sure. He’s still napping after his little visit to the pasture.” Talking about Eddie brought Kate’s thoughts back to their neighbor. Luke could be at the hardware store, or just around town…or with Hank and Gwendolyn for dinner out. Ever since that first nonmeeting at the café, Kate had been unexpectedly conscious of him. She could barely talk to him, even to apologize for her son’s transgressions. The man flustered her more than she’d been flustered in a long, long time.
“Oh? Did he cross the fence again?”
Kate held up the shirt. “There’s evidence he did, though I didn’t get a call.” Kate sighed. “I don’t know why Eddie’s so interested in those animals.”
“Oh, come on, Kate. Zebras in the Texas Hill Country? A floppy-eared donkey and two matching white horses? Of course he’s curious. I just wish he’d listen to our warnings. Like you said, he walks—or runs, probably—across our pasture with those longhorns out there. They seem gentle, but those horns are deadly.”
“I know. He loves being outdoors. I had to be so protective when we lived on a busy street in the suburbs. I’d hate to confine him to the apartment here.”
“No, you can’t do that. Children need time to play. It’s too bad he’s such a sneaky escape artist—and I mean that in the nicest way.”
Kate laughed as she stuffed the shirt into the washer. “I know exactly what you mean. Wait until Marsha starts crawling and walking. You’ll get a real workout then.”
“Speaking of workouts, I’d better change. Bretford House isn’t formal, but I don’t like to go there dressed like I should be in yoga class or going for a jog.”
Kate looked down at her own jeans and sweatshirt. “I’d have to change, too, and I still have a lot of work to do. Maybe I’ll pass tonight. You and Travis have a double date with Gwendolyn and Hank.”
“And our two little monsters? I’m sure they’re bringing their little boy, so dinner should be interesting with both kids teething. Come to think of it, maybe you should stay home!”
Kate chuckled, then Jodie said, “Well, I’m going to get dressed. If you change your mind, be ready in about a half an hour. Otherwise, we’ll see you tomorrow for church.”
“Yes, that’s the plan. If Eddie doesn’t run off again.”
“Good luck,” Jodie said with a smile, then turned and walked out of the garage.
Good luck. Kate knew she’d need it to avoid Luke Simon for the rest of her stay in Ranger Springs. Or, if she got a teaching job here, for the rest of her life. She didn’t want that flustered feeling, she especially didn’t want to get involved with a man, and she extra-especially didn’t want to encourage Eddie’s interest in what should clearly be off-limits—exotic animals and a Harley-riding Californian.
With a sigh, Kate added detergent and started the wash cycle.
THE FOLLOWING Saturday morning after breakfast, Eddie excused himself to play soldier in the backyard. Kate didn’t approve of the game, but Travis had played it with him after Eddie had seen coverage of the war on television. They both claimed that Kate, being a “girl,” just didn’t understand “guy things.”
Kate settled into her couch with her second cup of coffee and listened to Eddie’s new toy gun’s ratta-tat-tat as he ran from tree to tree. He should have a playmate. She hoped he made friends at the elementary school. Perhaps when she got a permanent job, she’d rent a house in town where there were other children his age. She didn’t want her son growing up lonely.
Pushing aside her misgivings about Eddie playing soldier, she picked up a professional teachers organization’s magazine and turned to an article she’d tagged. During her years of marriage, she hadn’t kept up with educational standards and was sadly behind in understanding
