icing on the cake when two people love each other. It—”
He stopped her in midsentence. “A baby will come if and when he’s supposed to. You have to trust that Josh knows what he’s doing. If he says not to worry, then don’t.”
She’d wanted Cole to be as eager to grow their family as she was, and his attitude grated on her. Didn’t he understand how much she wanted this? Didn’t he see that each passing month chipped away at her confidence and self-esteem?
And yet she understood Cole’s propensity to maintain the status quo when it came to his personal life. Although he never said, she guessed that losing his parents at such an early age and the subsequent turmoil in his life had made him reluctant to modify an established routine. She didn’t necessarily like his behavior, but it was a part of his character and she accepted it.
“Look,” she began, “I know how difficult it is for you to change course when you’re happy with the path you’re on. After all, between dating and living together, it took you almost three years before you finally proposed, but you should be as excited about a baby as I am.”
“I am.”
“You don’t act like it,” she mumbled.
He raised an eyebrow. “Would wringing my hands and calling Josh every week, pestering him for information and advice, change things?”
He had a point. “No,” she conceded. “But I want you to want this as much as I do and I’m not getting that impression from you.” While she knew Cole was more reserved than most, she wanted to see a more enthusiastic response. “Sometimes I think you only agreed to have a baby to humor me.”
“Oh, Sara.” He patted her back as he hugged her. “I’ll admit that I’m not eager for our lives to change because I’m happy with just the two of us. But I’d be happy if you got pregnant, too. A little girl with your pixie nose would be cute. So, you see, I’m basically a happy kind of guy.” He winked.
His teasing tone defused her aggravation. “Oh, you.” She poked him playfully. “Pixie nose, indeed.”
“Seriously, Sara …” his gaze grew intent “… stressing out about the situation won’t help matters. Josh won’t steer us wrong.”
Her husband’s confidence soothed her frazzled nerves. Slowly, she nodded. “You’re right, he won’t.”
“Good girl.” He cupped her face with both hands and kissed her. “There’s no doubt in my mind that it’ll happen, so stop worrying. Before long, you’ll be complaining about morning sickness, swollen ankles and not being able to see your own feet.”
She offered a wan smile. “I guess. Now, I’d better run or I really will be late.”
After she’d left, bundled against the cold, Cole noticed how quiet the house seemed without his bubbly wife’s presence. He’d hated seeing her so downcast for those few minutes and he wished Sara would focus on what she had rather than what she didn’t have. She’d always made it plain that she wanted a large family—two boys and two girls—like the one she’d had growing up, and while the thought of being responsible for four children—four—was enough to scare him spitless, he’d been willing to patiently and thoroughly do his part to fulfill her dream. He grinned as he remembered the last time they’d made love. They’d started in the kitchen then detoured to their oversize soaker tub before ending up in bed.
He enjoyed nights like those—craved them, in fact—and he wasn’t in any particular hurry to lose them. Truth was, he liked having his wife to himself. The idea that he someday would have even fewer private moments with her than he did now only made him cherish those times all the more.
While he looked upon their inability to conceive as one of the temporary mountains of life some people had to face—and was, in fact, a little relieved because he’d had so little experience with a loving family—she saw it as a personal failure. She shouldn’t, of course, because they were only in the early stages of the process. She’d gotten pregnant within six months of when they’d stopped using any birth control and although she’d lost the baby, only another nine months had passed. Consequently, they’d never thought they’d needed fertility testing, although if nothing happened soon, they would.
And yet he truly did believe what he’d told her. Mother Nature simply needed time to work and Josh would decide on the proper time for medical science to intervene.
Content to leave the situation in his colleague’s capable hands, he sat down to polish off his toast and coffee. As he munched, he idly glanced at the newspaper his wife had discarded and the trepidation he’d felt when Sara had first mentioned the helicopter crash came back, full force.
Ruth Warren.
Surely the woman wasn’t the same Ruth Warren from his youth—the same Ruth Warren he’d spent time with a few years ago at his fifteen-year class reunion. The same class reunion when he’d drowned his sorrows with far too many margaritas because Sara had left him.
In spite of his reluctance to take the step she’d wanted—marriage—he’d come to his senses quickly. Accepting that his life would stretch ahead interminably without her, he’d proposed a week later. Sara had never pressed for details about his change of heart and he’d never offered them, except to say that he’d been miserable without her. Six months later, after Sara had planned her dream wedding, they had been married. Now, in a few more weeks, they’d celebrate their three-year anniversary.
Three years of the happiness and contentment he hadn’t felt since he was eight.
Suddenly, he had to know if the Ruth Warren mentioned in the article was the girl who’d often sat beside him at school because their names fell so close alphabetically. Now that he thought about it, hadn’t she mentioned during their reunion weekend that she’d turned her teaching certificate into a nurse’s diploma? To be honest, there was a lot about those two days he didn’t remember …
Determined to find an answer, he abandoned his coffee on his way to his office and powered up his computer. Minutes later, he’d found the online obituary at the Tulsa World website and scanned the details. Most, he already knew.
Age 33, preceded in death by her parents, attended the University of Oklahoma, earned a degree in secondary education and later in nursing before taking a position as a flight nurse.
Reading the facts suddenly made them seem familiar, as if she’d told him of her career change and he’d simply forgotten. He read on …
Survivors include a son, as well as many friends and former students.
She’d had a son? She hadn’t mentioned a child, but she’d never been one to share the details of her personal life. He was certain he’d asked about her life—it had been a reunion, after all—but he’d been too focused on his own misery to remember the things she’d told him. Idly, he wondered if the boy’s father was still in the picture. Probably not, if the man hadn’t received mention.
A graveside service will be held at 10:00 a.m. Wednesday at the Oaklawn Cemetery.
Cole leaned back in his chair and stared blankly at the screen. The description of Ruth’s life had been rather succinct, and certainly didn’t do justice to the young woman he remembered. She’d lived through a horrible childhood, carried enough baggage to
