her into his arms.
She finally lost the battle with her tears. “I’m so sorry, Dad.” The rush of emotions came out in great, gasping sobs.
Her dad continued to hold her close the same as he’d done when she was a child and someone had hurt her feelings or she’d had a bike wreck and scraped all the skin off her knees. Even though it felt so good to be held like that, she could tell he was weaker than she remembered. She should be supporting him, not the other way around, even though she was still weak herself from the weeks of captivity.
Arden stepped back and gripped his arms. “I’m so sorry I worried you.”
“It wasn’t your fault, honey.”
It was, and she was going to do everything in her power to make sure she never did anything to cause him harm again.
“You need to sit down, rest.”
Her father waved off her concern. “If I rest any more, I’m going to go crazy. I’m fine, don’t worry.”
Not likely. In addition to being noticeably weaker, he was thinner and paler, as well. She started to insist he sit, but he smiled and gripped her hands with more of the strength with which she’d always associated him.
“I just want to look at my beautiful girl.”
“How about we go inside?” her aunt Emily said. “I bet you all are hungry.”
That was Emily from the time Arden could remember. If anyone was going through hard times of any sort, Emily was there to feed them.
Arden didn’t let go of her dad’s hand, but she allowed her aunt to give her a hug.
“We’re all so glad you’re safe,” Emily said next to her ear.
Arden offered her aunt a small smile as Emily stepped back. As her mom and Emily headed for the house, Arden turned to her dad. He reached up and wiped away the remnants of her tears then placed his hands on either side of her face and kissed her forehead.
“No more tears. You’re safe and you’re home. All is right with the world.”
That was only partially true. She knew from horrible experience that there was a lot very wrong with the world. But she couldn’t focus on that now, might not ever focus on it again. Instead, she slipped her arm around her father’s waist and accompanied him inside.
When they stepped through the door, Arden hadn’t taken two steps before she was greeted by another member of the family. Lemondrop, the family’s spoiled-rotten cat, twined himself in and around her ankles. Arden reached down and picked up the cat, running her fingers through his yellow fur.
“Hey, handsome.” She rubbed her nose against Lemondrop’s, and he began to purr loud enough to be heard in the next county.
“He tried to come with me to the airport this morning,” her mom said. “It was as if he knew where I was going.”
“Maybe he did,” her father said. “That cat is smarter than you think.”
It was a miracle Lemondrop had even lived. Arden had found him wet and emaciated on the side of the road when she was in high school. Dr. Franklin, the local vet, hadn’t held out a lot of hope for the kitten’s survival. Not one to give up, Arden had nursed little Lemondrop back to health and earned his undying devotion.
“You’d never know he was once a scrawny little kitten,” her mom said, echoing Arden’s thoughts.
Throughout the rest of the day, Arden somehow managed to make conversation with her family. They didn’t ask her anything about her captivity, though she knew they had to have a million questions. But she must be giving off an “I’m not ready to talk about it” vibe.
At one point, she curled up on the couch and dozed off with Lemondrop snuggled next to her. It was an unfortunate position for the cat when Arden jerked awake from a nightmare, sending him fleeing as if she’d turned into a fire-breathing monster.
By the time she and her parents finished eating dinner, filled alternately with light topics of conversation and tense silences, Arden was exhausted despite her nap.
“I’m going to go to bed,” she said.
“You need a good night’s sleep,” her mom said as she started to rise.
Arden held out her hand to stay her. “I’m fine. I’ll probably conk out before I hit the pillow.”
But despite being more tired than she’d ever imagined possible, she couldn’t go to sleep. Now that she was alone, her mind started spinning in circles, refusing to let her fall into oblivion. Images she’d held at bay since arriving home broke free to plague her. She shoved hard at them, forcefully replacing them with anything else she could latch on to—the time Lemondrop squared off against an opossum on the back porch, the framed copy of her first article from the high school paper, the time she’d been chased by an ostrich when it broke free of its pen at the county fair. Neil Hartley.
Her thoughts slowed and fixed on him, creating an odd calm within her. No doubt it was only a temporary reprieve from the memories that demanded space in her mind, but she’d take it even if she didn’t understand it. She didn’t really know him well. He was just the older brother of a classmate. And yet he’d known exactly what she’d needed in the convenience store that morning. She’d only made eye contact briefly, but it had been enough to realize he’d gotten even better-looking in the years that had passed. If she was the same woman she was even two months ago, she might try to get to know him better. But she wasn’t that person anymore.
She didn’t know who she was.
Arden jerked so violently as she woke from the nightmare that she almost fell off the edge of the bed. Instinct had her flailing, but she managed to catch herself on the corner of the nightstand. She stayed like that, her hand gripping the rounded edge of the wood, as she tried to slow her breathing and bring herself into the here and now. She swallowed against the dryness in her throat, but even that dragged her back to that cage in Uganda. There she’d wondered if she’d die of thirst before her kidnappers could manage to even find a buyer for her and the other captives in the surrounding cages.
With a shaky hand, she grabbed the glass of water on the nightstand as she swung her legs over the side of the bed. She gulped the entire contents of the glass as she tried to prevent her mind from replaying the dream. Why couldn’t nightmares of that place disappear almost immediately the way lots of dreams did when she woke? Why did her current freedom feel as if it might be the dream?
Arden lifted the back of her hand to her forehead to find it warm. No doubt she’d been tossing and turning, her heart racing. As she had earlier, she tried focusing on things other than the dream. But this time it didn’t work. Maybe it was because night cloaked the world around her, which had been the worst time of her captivity. Sure, it had provided some relief from the brutal sun, but it had also turned up the volume on creatures she couldn’t see or identify. As she’d strained to see the source of those screeches and howls, she’d imagined all manner of terrible beasts just waiting for the opportunity to make her their next meal. The truly horrible part was by the time she’d been rescued, she hadn’t known which she dreaded more—death by mystery beast
