face wasn’t flaming. In the past, her past, well, a woman like her could easily look pathetic when she was attracted to a man, especially a man who was totally out of bounds.
“Will you let me stay?” he repeated. “Will you tutor me until I’ve got everything down pat and until Toby and I feel comfortable together?”
“You know I can’t say no to that.”
He smiled at her, and heat rushed through her. “Then say yes, Colleen.”
She didn’t even remember saying the word. She felt faint and sick and nervous, as if her body was not her own. But she must have said yes, because Dillon had gone outside and he was pulling a suitcase from his car.
A man was going to be staying with her here at the Applegate Ranch. She wondered what he would say when he discovered that all her employees were women.
Chapter Two
MAYBE he should have stayed inside and read all that paperwork that Colleen had for him to pore over, but the enormity of what he was doing had finally hit, and Dillon needed a few minutes to regroup, so he stood on the porch leaning on the crooked railing as he looked out across the land. He’d spent a lifetime learning to control his emotions. Those lessons had served him well in business, and this past year with all that had happened, the merits of guarding his reactions had hit even harder.
But Colleen Applegate’s passionate loyalty to his son had been unexpected. It had caught him off guard, which was most likely why he had made that uncharacteristically impetuous declaration that he wanted her to give him parenting lessons. He was already regretting that decision and yet, she was right. He didn’t know a damn thing about caring for a baby and he wasn’t about to let just anyone take over that task.
He swore beneath his breath. “What a mess.”
The door opened behind him and when he turned to look at Colleen the expression on her face told him that she had, most likely, heard his last comment. Her chin was raised in defiance, and a trace of guilt slipped through Dillon. None of this, after all, was her fault.
“I apologize for the way that sounded.”
All the defiance slipped away from her. “I doubt this was what you had anticipated when you thought about having children.”
“I hadn’t actually thought about it too much.”
She studied him. “You didn’t want a child?”
It hadn’t been that so much. “I felt…unqualified. Still do. But he’s here, and just because I hadn’t anticipated him doesn’t mean I don’t want him. He’s never going to feel as if his birth was a mistake, so don’t even think that I’m heading down that path. I’m taking this job seriously.”
“Job?”
“Dad.”
Colleen gave a curt nod. “Okay, Dad. Let’s get you settled. Then we’ll get right to the father lessons.”
Dillon saw now that she had a bundle of quilts in her arms. He reached out and started to take them from her but she shook her head.
“I can carry a few blankets,” she said.
“I’m sure you can. You run a ranch. You tend to my son. You have employees. But just because you can doesn’t mean you should. I’m not a guest and I’m sure having me living here is an imposition that wasn’t remotely in your plans for this week. If you won’t let me compensate you for Toby’s care, at least let me pull my weight.” Take back some of the control you’ve lost these past months, he told himself. He’d grown up having no input into his parents’ decision to farm him out to disinterested keepers. As a child, his quest for affection had only resulted in a roller-coaster ride of brief bouts of interest followed by long periods of apathy from both his parents and the people they hired to keep him fed, occupied and out of their way.
So, when he’d grown up, he’d turned to something ever dependable: logic and control. The precise environment of engineering never failed him. The reliability of being able to predict and control outcomes, and the measured skills involved in running a company and commanding troops, had been a perfect fit…until the events of the last year had blindsided him.
That time was over. He was not a man given to highs and lows and he’d made a mistake choosing someone as volatile as Lisa. Somehow, he’d missed who and what she was, just as the soldier walking ahead of him hadn’t seen that land mine that had taken his life and injured Dillon. But, from now on, Dillon was putting the lid back on his emotions and regaining control of his life in even the most basic ways. He tugged on the quilts.
To his surprise, Colleen didn’t let go. “This visit wasn’t in your plans, either, I’m sure. And just so you know, so that there won’t be too many surprises, ranch life’s difficult,” she countered. To her credit, she didn’t glance at his leg, though he knew that was at least part of what she was referring to.
Dillon had a feeling that Colleen was one of those surprises. Was the woman really worrying about the welfare of the man who’d come to take the baby she clearly coveted?
“I’ll let you know if it gets to be too much.”
A small smile lifted her lips. “Somehow I doubt you would admit any such thing. You’re an infuriatingly determined man, Mr. Farraday, but all right.” She turned over the quilts.
He smiled slightly at her tone, but he didn’t apologize. “Just Dillon will do. If you’ll show me where I’m staying while I’m here, I’ll get settled so that we can get right down to that crash course in fatherhood.”
She hesitated. And hesitated some more. “The bunkhouse is occupied.”
“And you don’t feel comfortable having a man in your house,” he remembered.
She looked uneasy. “I know that seems silly when I’m an independent woman who’s been running a ranch for years, but—”
Dillon raised one hand to silence her. “You don’t have to apologize or explain anything to me, Colleen. It doesn’t sound silly. You’re careful. That’s good.” Although he could tell from her expression that her concerns went deeper than simply being careful. Not his business. Nothing he needed to know about.
“Still, you’re here to learn about taking care of Toby. You’ll want to be near when he wakes up in the middle of the night. I have an enclosed back porch, and at this time of year you won’t need heat. You won’t have to worry about anyone intruding on you there. There’s a door separating it from the house and a sleeper sofa that’s…I’m sorry, I can’t lie. It’s almost comfortable.”
Dillon wanted to smile, but she was clearly a bit embarrassed at her refusal to let him all the way inside her house. “I’ve been a soldier, Colleen. I’ve slept in the mud from time to time, and I’m used to less than comfortable circumstances, so I’m sure I’ll be fine sleeping on the porch.”
“Is he really staying?” a voice rang out. Dillon turned to see a big iron-haired woman making her way across the grass toward the house. “Gretchen said you called and told her that he was, but I didn’t believe her. It’s been a long time since we had a fine-looking man visiting the Applegate,” the woman told Dillon.
Dillon
