moment he was within distance of her stall, her sweet head bump going a long way toward uncoiling the tension wrapping his shoulders. “You want out for a walk, baby?”
Anticipation lit her dark eyes, and Ethan made quick work of her lead. In moments, he had her in the paddock, watching as she pranced in happy circles. He briefly thought about calling the doctor to confirm she wouldn’t injure her foal, but knew he was being overly cautious. Doc Peters had said Dream could resume regular activity. In fact, he’d made it an imperative.
So he trusted the animal knew what was best for her and stood back to watch.
The late afternoon quiet wrapped around him. Several hands had the other horses out, exercising and riding the land, while another crew had gone out to mend a patch of fence. He’d wanted to go with them—knew he should be with them—but he found himself loath to go too far from the house.
Roiling emotions aside, he couldn’t shake the fear that something terrible was hovering out there, waiting for them. He cursed again and fought to keep his focus firmly on fact. He’d spent his childhood living in fear, and the moment he had some control over his life, he’d sworn off continuing to live that way. He would handle this.
Whatever this was.
He had means. And he had a damn good head on his shoulders. If neither worked, he had a loaded shotgun in his closet that could help seal the deal.
At the image of the gun, Ethan quickly made a mental note to purchase a gun safe. There was no way he was keeping an unlocked gun around a small child. One who would be in his house all too soon.
“Those are some heavy thoughts.”
Ethan turned at the soft words and came face-to-face with Lizzie. The afternoon sun had warmed things and she stood there in her sweatshirt and an old vest he kept hanging in his mudroom. The image of her in his things shot another arrow of need through him, and he turned toward the paddock and away from the tempting sight. “Just giving Dream a run. She needed some fresh air.”
Lizzie took a spot next to him on the rail, her booted foot propped up on the bottom rung. Color ran high on her cheeks as she pointed toward the far side of the ring. “She looks well.”
“Doc Peters is amazing.”
“He may be, but it looks like you’ve got a pretty amazing horse, too.”
Ethan felt the scrutiny—Lizzie wasn’t subtle—and marveled at the frank honesty. Even when she was a small child, she’d had that gaze. Bright green eyes that could size you up and tease you in one fell swoop.
Unwilling to keep his gaze diverted, he turned to stare into the familiar. And had to admit the wide-eyed innocence of the child had given way to the knowledge of a grown woman.
“Dream’s perfect.”
“You always wanted a barn full of horses. I remember how you used to talk of the ranch you’d have. I could see it, too.” Lizzie stepped back from the paddock rail and turned slowly, making a full circle, before she turned back toward him. “It’s just as you’d said it would be.”
“I knew what I wanted.”
“Yes, you did. And now you have it. That must be satisfying.”
Satisfying, yes. But a bit empty.
The thought caught him completely unaware, and Ethan scrambled to reorganize the odd impressions swirling through his mind.
Empty? When had that idea settled in and taken root?
Even as the confusion whirled around in his thoughts like a dust storm, Ethan knew. That weekend after he and Lizzie had shared time at the rodeo, he’d walked the land and wondered why the vastness he’d always welcomed suddenly seemed oppressive.
The ranch was his. This corner of Texas, so open and wide, had become his own. He’d put every ounce of himself into the place since he was nineteen. First as a hand, then as foreman and then—finally—as his own after his old boss wanted out of the business.
The ranch was his life. It was as much a part of him as his heart and soul.
So when had it stopped being enough?
“Ethan?”
“Sorry. Long day.”
She let his polite lie pass and turned back to the paddock. “I’ll give her credit. She certainly has more energy than I do.”
“Are you okay?” He had one hand on her back and the other covering her hand before he could even think to check his movements. “Do you need to lie down?”
Her shoulders stiffened beneath his hands before relaxing, and she moved a heartbeat closer. “I’m fine. I just tire easier, even with an afternoon spent lazing around like a cat.”
“The benefit of moving on four legs instead of two?”
Lizzie laughed at that, her smile wide and open. “Maybe that’s it.”
“You’ve had a lot on your mind.”
Those delicate shoulders stiffened once more and he cursed himself for bringing such unpleasantness into their conversation.
“Yes. I have.”
“Well, one thing to take off it is me.”
Her gaze changed, shifted. The bright smile she’d worn while watching Dream was nowhere in evidence. “How so?”
“This is my child. You have my commitment that I will help you and stand by you. Both.”
“That’s comforting.”
“It’s fact. You won’t face this alone. I will be a father to my child.”
* * *
Lizzie pushed on a bright smile and ignored the pain that drummed against her heart with all the finesse of a blunt instrument.
Ethan Colton would be an amazing father to their child.
And that was all he’d be.
Shake it off, Lizzie girl. Shake it off.
The fantasy she’d warned herself against over the past six months—ever since that night at the rodeo—curled against the corners of her mind with reaching fingers. Although she knew it for the emotional foolishness it was, that small, hopeful piece of her had wondered if there could be more with Ethan.
With her gaze on the horse, she kept her voice level. “That’s a lot to take on. Especially with all the issues I’m having back at home.”
“Issues we’ll face together.” She sensed him before she felt him, the light press of his fingers against her shoulder drawing her attention. “Lizzie. I mean it. You’re not alone.”
“I’m always alone.”
The words were out before she could censor them. She hated playing the abandonment card—it suggested a weakness she refused to feel. She was proud
