didn’t that make her quite the ultra bitch. Horny ultra bitch, she corrected. A sad, sad combination.
“You need googliness too, Jade. But you’re so picky,” Beryl decided, her voice muffled because she had her head inside the refrigerator.
Jade frowned. Was that any better than horny ultra bitch? Instead of denying it, she made a humming sound that could be agreement. Or “Jingle Bells.”
“Oh, I know,” Beryl exclaimed excitedly. The younger woman bumped the fridge door shut with her hip, then set the batch of cream-cheese cookie dough on the counter for the next round of treats and gave an excited clap of her hands. “I’ll have Neal set you up with someone. He’s got a huge family, with people always in and out of their house. He has a whole slew of cousins visiting for the holidays, even. I’m sure he can find a great date for you. What do you think? Maybe we can double this weekend?”
“God, no!” Shock and horror sped through Jade’s blood at equal speed. A blind date, set up by her little sister’s boyfriend? Why not just force her to parade through town naked, wearing ugly discount-store shoes? That sounded a little more fun and much less humiliating.
“Why not? It’d be fun.”
“I’m not interested in dating. And if I were, I definitely wouldn’t need my little sister’s boyfriend finding me a pity date.”
“Fiancé, not boyfriend,” Beryl corrected, smiling softly as she tilted her hand from side to side so the diamond glinted. “And you should be interested in dating. It’s been four years since that jerk, Eric, ran off to join the circus. You’ve hardly dated, and when you did, nobody lasted more than a month. C’mon, Jade. Give it a chance.”
Join the circus was her sisters’ disdainful dismissal of Jade’s fiancé ditching her at the altar to follow his dream of being a big-city attorney. She knew he figured he’d done her a favor by not making her choose between him and her responsibility to her family. So she tried not to be bitter.
But being a good sister—and hey, a girl’s got the right to be a little bitter about losing her wedding night—she never bothered to correct their nasty comments about Eric. Why ruin the fun?
“Don’t nag, Berry,” Ruby chided as she arranged the last of three dozen chocolate-peppermint sandwiches in a decorated tin for the bake sale. “If Jade wanted to date, she would.”
“Well, she’s got to want sex,” Beryl argued, giving Jade an arch look of inquiry. Unable to deny that she hated this long dry spell, Jade just shrugged. “Aha. See! So unless you’re planning to call Horny-for-Hire, you have to do some dating to get to the sex.”
“Horny-for-Hire?” Jade asked, laughing too hard to be offended. Besides, Beryl was right. She was a big fan of sex and seriously missed the opportunity to enjoy it on a regular basis. It just wasn’t worth going through the dating drama to get it, though.
“You know what I mean.”
“I know that you’re a sweetie who wants everyone to have what you do,” Jade said, truly appreciating that her sisters cared enough to want her as happy as they were. “But it’s not that simple. Nor is it something I have the time—or the inclination—to deal with right now.”
“Aren’t you the one who’s always saying that it’s the everyday choices that count most? Or that there’s no time like the present to get off your ass and fix your life? Or, you know whatever those other feel-good sayings are that you’re always quoting from those empowerment classes you teach?”
“You’re paraphrasing the message just a little, there.” Jade grimaced. Still, Beryl was right. That was pretty much the message Jade included in all her presentations.
The classes had started out as a simple Dress for Career Success talk for teenagers that she’d offered at the library. Somehow midtalk, she’d sort of drifted from making an impression through clothes to why every woman deserved to pursue her dream career. Since Jade was currently working in a library—where, let’s face it, fashion was closer to a word in the dictionary than an actual trend—she’d felt a bit like a fraud. But the kids—and many of the parents—had loved the presentation. So much so that the following month, she’d been asked to tweak the presentation for the ladies’ club.
A year and a half later, Jade still felt like a fraud, but her workshop repertoire had expanded from Fashion and Career Empowerment to Embracing Sexuality, The Art Of Saying No, and Lingerie for All Ages. Not too bad for a woman who wasn’t living her dream career or getting any regular nookie.
Still, it was enough to make her want to dig into the bowl of chocolate chips for a little comfort.
“Isn’t being empowered about creating a life that makes you happy?” Beryl prompted. “And for that, you need a man, of course.”
Shocked, Jade dropped the chocolate morsels back in the bowl and stared. She couldn’t have heard that right.
“Of course?” Ruby repeated, so offended her voice hit five different decibels. “Nobody needs a man to make them happy.”
“They do if they want sex,” Beryl countered with a gloating smile only a sheltered and slightly spoiled twenty-two-year-old could pull off.
Ruby and Jade exchanged eye rolls, but neither was willing to delve into the ins and outs of self-pleasuring during their baking marathon. But Jade made a mental note to add a Sexing Solo workshop to her spring-workshop offerings.
“Part of being empowered is being able to say no,” she pointed out gently instead. “It’s also empowering to accept someone else’s decision with grace.”
Beryl’s lower lip poked out for a second as visions of fun double dates burst in her head. Then, in her usual cheerful fashion, she shrugged it off. “Fine. If you don’t want to date, that’s your call. So, where’s the cookie press?”
Used to Beryl’s verbal one-eighties and non sequiturs, they all scanned the kitchen. The three large green-and-red bins they’d hauled in that morning to start preparing for the Carson Holiday Open House were stacked against one wall. Held every year on the twenty-third, it was a little over two weeks away. Just enough time to make and bake every delicious holiday treat in Mom’s cookbook. Jade sighed.
“We’re missing one bin,” Ruby realized. “It’s probably still in the garage.”
“I’ll get it.”
Jade waited until the kitchen door shut behind Beryl before shaking her head.
“A blind date,” she breathed in dismay. “Seriously?”
“The mind boggles at the horror,” Ruby agreed. Then she gave Jade a long, considering look. “She’s right, though. You do need a date. Just not a blind one.”
“I don’t think so. In the first place, I have no interest in dating. In the second, even if I did have an interest, one of the joys of small towns is that there is nobody here to date. The men are all too young, too old, too married or just too icky.”
“Not all of them,” Ruby objected. “There are one or two nice single guys within your optimal age-dating range.”
“Optimal age-dating range?” Jade repeated with a laugh.
“You
