when the week was over she might still be alone…but at least she wouldn’t be pathetic, for pity’s sake. At least—provided she found a skilled lover—she would have had a real honest-to-goodness back-clawing, earth-shattering, screaming orgasm. The one and only time she’d ever had sex, it had been a miserable, awkward experience, which had lasted less than a successful bull ride. The combination of alcohol, loneliness, curiosity and screaming hormones had perpetuated the rash decision and, ultimately, she’d wasted her virginity on a bumbling, overzealous nerd who didn’t know any more about the act than she did.
She wouldn’t make that mistake this time—this time she was prepared.
Using her inherent Type-A tendencies, Samantha had planned this vacation down to a T, knew precisely what she wanted and how to go about getting it. Between the combination of the sex diet, her newly improved looks and a beach full of single horny men, surely to God she could find one interested in having a little recreational sex with her. Find one who would know how to do the business properly, so that she would at least be satisfied when it was over. Her lips curled into a slow smile.
Hopefully multisatisfied.
Her gaze strayed to the flyer once more and a prickle of irritation strummed across her frazzled nerves. Just her luck that the one week she’d have the added bonus of diet-induced sex appeal, the beach and B&B would be crawling with tanned, toned and thonged competition.
“Would you like me to call and try to arrange other accommodations for you?” perky Tina asked.
Samantha blinked out of her reverie. “No,” she said, exasperated. “I would like to have the accommodations I reserved.”
Her smile faltered. “I’ve told you—”
“I don’t care what you’ve told me,” Samantha interrupted tightly. She clawed at her belly, an insistent reminder that she needed those antihistamines now. Her ace-in-the-hole sex diet had one distinctly uncomfortable disadvantage—it primarily consisted of seafood…which she just happened to be mildly allergic to. But desperate times called for desperate measures.
She’d invested—and ingested—too much to turn back now.
Her entire plan hinged on this vacation. She blew out a frustrated breath. “Where’s Gladys?” Samantha asked impatiently. Gladys would take care of this snafu and all would be well.
“Somewhere on the Pacific Ocean.”
Sam blinked. “What?”
“She got married last week. She’s on her honeymoon.”
Gladys got married? Crusty old Gladys snagged a husband? Hank had definitely not mentioned that, Samantha thought absently as she managed a sick smile. That she would have remembered.
Sam contemplated that disheartening little revelation and wished that she were a big enough person to be happy for Gladys without feeling sorry for herself, but apparently she wasn’t, because all she could think was how more pathetic her life seemed now that even Gladys had gotten married.
That settled it, Samantha thought determinedly—she’d get laid this week and have a damned orgasm, or die trying.
“Well, that’s nice,” Sam finally managed weakly. “What about Hank?”
Another prickle of irritation surfaced. Quite honestly, she’d wanted a minute to freshen up before she saw Hank—a moot point since he didn’t care what she looked like—but she couldn’t help but look forward to seeing his reaction to her new-and-improved self. She didn’t expect him to turn into a lust-crazed maniac—she wasn’t stupid enough to even so much as hope that would happen—but a flicker of surprise would be nice. Vain? Yes. But after the effort she put into making herself more attractive, she thought she deserved a little gratification.
Tina blanched. “H-Hank?”
“Yes, Hank,” Samantha replied slowly, intrigued by Tina’s oh-hell expression.
“Er…he’s not here at the moment.”
Samantha’s eyes narrowed as she watched Tina gnaw nervously on her bottom lip. “I can see that,” she said patiently. “Where is he?”
Tina paused, heaved a protracted sigh with a roll of her eyes. “He went to fish a sand crab out of the pool,” she admitted begrudgingly, and lifted a small walkie-talkie from the desk. “I’ll call him.”
From the tone of her voice, a pelvic exam conducted by Captain Hook held more appeal.
Tina depressed the call button and spoke into the black-and-neon-green gadget. “Hank, could you come to the front desk please?”
Static, then, “Is there a problem, Tina?”
Jeez, Samantha thought, just hearing his voice made the fine hairs on her arms stand on end, forced her to repress a shiver. A current of electricity zinged up her spine, tingled her nipples and buzzed her sex with warmth.
Hank Masterson was the epitome of the quintessential beach bum—tall, tanned, built, blond and gorgeous. He had the clearest, most beautiful sea-blue eyes and a lazy, slumberous smile that made a woman’s brain melt and her blood simmer. He exuded easy, effortless charm and had cornered the market in sex appeal. In addition to being absolutely gorgeous, he had a great personality and a brilliant head for business. Hank was the total package and if a woman ever managed to hook his attention even for a little while, she had better net him while she could. Men like Hank were few and far between.
And, Samantha thought with a grim, melancholy stab of regret, completely out of her reach.
She might be able to go from geek to chic for a week, but a permanent transformation was more than she could reasonably hope for. Besides, she knew Hank well enough to know that over the years he’d considered her as many things, but regrettably potential girlfriend or lover had never been one of them.
A smile caught the corner of her mouth. The word nuisance leapt immediately to mind. As children, Hank had grudgingly tolerated her presence with the sort of martyred stoicism reserved for pesky little girls. But miraculously, by the time she’d reached her teens, she and Hank had developed a very close friendship—one they’d maintained over the years via e-mail, phone calls and yearly visits—and she would have liked nothing better than to parlay that special connection into something more.
Hank, though, had never been remotely interested.
Her lips twisted with wry humor. Hell, if it hadn’t been for that ill-fated almost-kiss, she wouldn’t have been convinced he’d even noticed that she was a girl. God knows, he’d always treated her just like one of the guys. He’d never displayed the least amount of modesty around her, had routinely stripped and gone skinny-dipping right in front of her drooling, flaming face and, oftentimes, had even shared intimate details of his relationships with other women with her. Things, she was sure, he shared with his male cronies. Items that had made her squirm with longing and jealousy, made her want to break things and scream.
Of course, she’d never done any of those things. She’d always smiled, listened and teased and been her typically amiable self because she’d rather be flayed alive and dipped in boiling oil than to admit her feelings were anything more than platonic, that she’d wanted more from him than a chuck under the chin or a friendly pat on the back. Samantha knew that if Hank ever
