and it seemed they both knew some line had just been crossed. Though she couldn’t tell from Joe’s steely stare how he felt, and wasn’t about to guess because the thought made her get all jittery inside, she hoped he couldn’t tell how shaken she was.
She watched him with a mixture of shame and longing, but mostly confusion. Damn that concussion. “Thanks for the lesson,” she whispered. “I’d better get some rest now.”
They’d gotten too close, that was a fact.
She turned to head for her room, but a sense of duty stopped her. The man had saved her life then offered to share his home with her. Where did a guy like that come from? The least she could do was tell him what she’d been through, why she’d run away from home. He deserved to know how she’d ended up smack in the middle of his life. And if she shared, maybe she’d find out something about him, too.
“Joe?” She circled back to face him.
“Yeah?” He’d gone back to throwing punches at his punchbag and stopped.
“I ran away from a man who wanted to possess me. Completely. Little by little he clipped away at my life. Half the time I didn’t even notice, until one day I realized he’d isolated me from everything I liked and loved other than him.” She picked at a broken fingernail. “He wanted to control my life, and when I got pregnant he acted like that would ruin everything and got abusive with me.” Carey stared at her feet rather than risk seeing any judgment on Joe’s face. “I ran away the night he handed me a wad of money and told me to take care of ‘it’, as if my baby was a problem that needed fixing. He didn’t want to share me with anyone, not even our kid.”
She finally glanced up to find nothing but empathy in Joe’s eyes. “I fought him and he roughed me up. So when he gave me the money I grabbed whatever I could without being obvious, acted like I was going to do what he wanted, then ran for my life.”
Joe stepped toward her but she backed up, needing the distance and to tell him her entire story.
“I came to California because it was the next bus out of Montclare, and I didn’t have time to pick or choose. I must have looked like a sitting duck because I stepped off the bus and immediately got dragged into that alley.” Frightened to relive that night, and frustrated by the emotion rolling through her, she dug her fingers into her hair. “At first I thought maybe Ross had somehow found me and he was taking me back home. Then I realized I was getting mugged, but it was too late. I didn’t know how to protect myself.” She removed her hands from her hair and held them waist high, palms upward, beseeching Joe to understand. “If it wasn’t for you I don’t know where I’d be.
“I owe my life to you, and I’ve got to be honest and say it’s strange to feel that way.” She sat on the edge of the nearby dining table chair. “Yet here you are day after day watching over me, making my life better. I’m grateful, I am, but please understand that I’m confused and scared and...” Her voice broke with the words. “And I don’t know what the future holds for me. Whether I stay here or go somewhere else, I just don’t know, but the only thing that matters right now is my baby.” Her forearm folded across her stomach and she blinked.
“I get it,” Joe said. “Believe me, I understand how life-changing a baby can be.”
“You do? Are you a father?”
“Uh, no.” He immediately withdrew.
“So how do you know, then?”
“Look, forget I said that. Right now, all I want is for you to be healthy and safe.” He came to her and crouched to be eye level with her. “I’m sorry if I’ve made you uncomfortable. I can’t help but find you attractive, so there, I’ve said it, and I know that’s not acceptable.”
How was she supposed to answer him? “It may not be acceptable but I feel the same way.” Oh, God, she’d put her secret thoughts into words. “It’s just the worst timing in the world, you know?”
“I know. Like I said, I get it.” He made the wise decision not to touch her but instead to stand and step back.
“Thank you for understanding.”
“Of course.”
She stood and started walking, this time without looking back, and headed on wobbly legs to her room. Had she just admitted she found Joe Matthews as attractive as he’d just confirmed he found her?
This was nuts! So she’d blame it on the head trauma.
Joe stood perfectly still, watching Carey make her exit. He half expected to hear her lock the door to the bedroom. He hoped he hadn’t made her feel creepy about him. It hadn’t been his intention to get her in a hug, but he’d been showing her ways to get out of predatory attacks and had inadvertently become a predator himself.
Great going, Joe. You made your house guest think you wanted to crawl into her bed.
He went back to the porch and punched the bag. “Ouch!” He hadn’t prepared his fist and it hurt like hell. And what had gotten into him to let slip that he’d known how it felt to be an expectant parent? That wouldn’t happen again. He wound up, wanting to punch the bag again, this time even harder, but stopped himself.
Regardless of how awkward he may have made Carey feel, she’d just opened up to him. Man, she’d had it tough back in Chicago. He couldn’t remember the name of the suburb she’d come from, and right now that didn’t matter. What mattered was that she shouldn’t feel like she’d run all the way across country only to find herself in the same situation again.
She needed to get out of the house. To begin something. To get that job and start some money rolling in before she got so pregnant she wouldn’t be able to. His head started spinning with everything that needed to be done for her. He needed to help her get her independence back.
From personal experience he knew about a special class at The Hollywood Hills Clinic. A class that would be perfect for where she was right now in her life. He knew the right people to talk to about it, too. And he’d move ahead with her getting that job, so if she wanted, in time, she could move out.
Maybe he couldn’t erase what had happened between them just now, but he sure as hell could make some changes for the better happen, starting tomorrow.
He flipped off the light and headed to his room to take a cold shower and hopefully catch a little sleep.
On Friday afternoon Carey sat on the backyard deck in the shade of the huge jacaranda tree, the flowers falling into piles of light purple and scattering across the wood planks like pressed flowers in a painting. She’d been reading an article about early pregnancy on the internet on Joe’s tablet when she heard his hybrid SUV pull into the garage and shortly after he came through the gate in the backyard.
Did he know she was out here? Or, more likely after last night, maybe he wanted to avoid her by coming through the back way, hoping she’d be inside.
“Hey,” he said, all smiles, as if nothing monumental had occurred between them last night.
“Hi. You’re home early.”
He came toward the deck but didn’t come up, keeping a safe distance between them, placing a foot on the second step and leaning a forearm over his knee. “One of the perks of owning your own business is that I call the shots. It was a slow day, so I took off early.”
