The Woman In The Mirror. Rebecca James
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After lunch, the three of us venture into parkland. The lawns at Winterbourne would once have been impeccably tended, but now, as I observed in the Rolls when we first approached, they are hopelessly overgrown. Creepers straggle across the paths; chipped stone planters are covered in moss, and two lion heads at the top of a run of steps have ears and eyes missing, stolen by the elements. The topiary is melted out of shape and the whole impression is one of a garden underwater, liquid and strange. Behind us, Winterbourne rises in giant, eerie magnificence. I hear the sea, an incessant, rhythmic breath as it washes into shore.
‘This afternoon,’ I tell them as we take the path to the wood, ‘we’re going to draw a picture.’ I’m invigorated by the day: the sun, the sky and the birdsong.
‘Like a flower?’ says Constance.
‘Like a fox,’ says Edmund.
‘A flower would be easier to draw than a fox,’ I say, ‘because we need to be able to really look at it. We’re going to look at it in incredible detail, and keep looking at it as we draw, so that we can reproduce as accurate a likeness as possible.’
‘It has to be still, then,’ says Edmund.
‘That’s absolutely right. One can draw a moving thing, of course one can, but one isn’t able to study it with as much care.’ We pick our way over a twisted tree branch. The children are used to coming this way for they step over it easily, while I am obliged to stop and adjust my skirt. ‘Tom found a dead fox,’ says Edmund. He collects a stick and pokes the ground with it. ‘He’s always finding dead foxes.’
‘Edmund!’ Constance covers her ears.
‘It’s all right, Constance.’ I smile. ‘Nature is red in tooth and claw.’
‘I don’t like it.’
‘Could I draw a dead fox?’ says Edmund.
‘You could if you wanted. But it’s rather morbid, don’t you think?’
‘But I could study it, in detail, then, as you say. It wouldn’t be able to get away from me. It wouldn’t be able to run away.’
‘True. But when you looked at your picture afterwards, you wouldn’t think of the fox as living, would you? You wouldn’t remember how clever you were to reproduce its detail as it rushed through the wood. You’d remember it as a body.’
‘And you’d hate to look at it,’ says Constance. ‘It would make you sad.’
‘I suppose,’ says Edmund. A neat frown puckers his childish brow. ‘But Father has his case of birds – those stuffed crows on the landing. They used to scare us, didn’t they, Connie? We’d run past them with our eyes shut in case they jumped out and pecked us! People like to look at those, and that’s the same thing, isn’t it?’
I spy a place for us to sketch, a soft clearing, surrounded by flora.
‘It depends on the person,’ I say. ‘Everybody likes different things. Hence the multiplicity of art.’
‘What does multiplicity mean?’
‘A big collection, full of variety.’
‘I’m going to draw a flower,’ says Constance.
‘That’s boring,’ says the boy.
‘In your opinion,’ I tell him. ‘And that’s what we’re talking about. Art is preference. Art is personal. Constance prefers the flower, while you prefer the fox. Neither is right or wrong. It’s about what you wish to see in the thing you’re looking at. Do you wish to observe a living soul, or do you wish to capture it?’
Edmund thinks about it for a moment. Then he smiles cunningly and says,‘May we draw you, miss?’
‘That isn’t really the object of the exercise.’
‘Alice is a pretty name,’ interjects Constance.
‘Thank you.’
‘I wish I were called Alice.’
‘Constance is lovely. It means for ever.’
‘That’s what Mummy used to say.’
The mention of their mother catches me off guard. Another detail, another candle held up to the frozen mist I hold in my mind. What did Mrs de Grey look like? Was she fair, like me, or dark like her husband? She must have been very beautiful, I think, to have such beautiful children and to have attracted a man like the captain.
It is a relief to reach the clearing, and to incite the children to sit and open their sketchbooks. Perhaps it is the ghost of Mrs de Grey still clinging to our collective mood, or perhaps it is the sheer sweetness of their faces as they gaze hopefully up at me, but before I know it I have agreed to Edmund’s request and am sitting opposite on a blanket, preparing to be drawn. ‘Wait—!’ calls Constance, and she jumps up and brings a daisy to me, which she threads through my hair.
‘There,’ she says, kissing my cheek. ‘Now it’s perfect.’
‘Be kind to me, won’t you?’ I say.
‘We’re always kind,’ says Edmund.
New York, present day
Quakers Oatley Solicitors
St James House
Richmond Square
Mayfair
London W1—
Ms Rachel Wright
Apt 243E
West 27th Street, NY—
9 September 2016
Dear Ms Wright
Re: Winterbourne Hall, Polcreath, Cornwall
It is with regret that I write to inform you of the death of your aunt Constance de Grey, who passed away at her ancestral home in the early hours of Sunday morning.
I am conscious that this might come as something of a surprise, as I believe you were unaware of your connection with the Winterbourne Estate. Nonetheless, as the de Grey family solicitor, it is my duty to inform you that, being Miss de Grey’s next of kin, the park and all its land and contents now fall directly into your possession.