standing by the maître d’s desk, waiting for her. His hair was shiny as a crow’s wing, like his mom’s, his back to her, as he was talking to someone. Oh, crap, it was Jessica Dunn. Great. No one made her feel less attractive than Jessica, who probably had never even heard of Microfiber Slim-Nation undergarments.
Faith had dressed for the occasion, oh, yes. One does not meet one’s gay ex-fiancé without looking fantastic. Her cutest San Francisco dress, a bright yellow confection with good seaming and tulle flowers bunched along the hem. In SF, it had seemed like sunshine itself; now, seeing Jessica dressed in black skinny jeans and a black V-neck sweater, Faith felt like a giant kindergartener. Well. At least she had on slutty shoes.
Now or never, Faith, her brain instructed, sounding like Mrs. Linqvest, who’d often whipped out stories of Eve’s pain in childbirth to better terrorize the kids. Faith opened the door, the handle cold in her damp palm.
Jeremy turned around, and his eyes went soft. “Hey,” he breathed.
“Hi there, stranger,” she said, her voice sounding false. Then she hugged him, and oh, crikey, he felt so good. Three and a half years apart, and she remembered everything about him, how they fit together, her cheek against his shoulder, the hard, smooth muscles of his back, the soft brush of his hair against her cheek, the smell of Old Spice (again...how could he be gay and wear Old Spice? Or had that been a clue?).
She’d loved him so much. The best man she knew...and the man who’d lied to her for years. Who’d allowed her to think they’d have everything.
Faith pulled back and gave him a smile, which shook a little at the corners. Jeremy’s eyes were wet, too.
“You got even more beautiful,” he said a little unsteadily.
The words caused the lump in her throat to swell. “And you haven’t changed a bit.” But he had, a little. There was a sadness around his eyes, and a few very appealing crow’s-feet had sprung up, making him even more handsome.
“Hi, Faith,” Jessica said, a tinge of impatience in her voice, like she’d had enough of the reunion.
“Hi, Jess. Nice to see you.”
Jess cocked an eyebrow. Really, she and Levi had been the perfect couple. Maybe they could go into business. Condescending Looks, LLC. “Come on, I have your old table for you.” She led them through Hugo’s to the table by the window. Jeremy held her chair, just like old times. Jess handed them menus like she was giving out Oscars, then asked if they knew what they wanted to drink.
“How about a bottle of the Fulkerson dry Riesling?” Jeremy said. “Got any left?”
“We do.”
Jeremy smiled at Faith. “They beat us out of the platinum last year. Don’t tell my parents I ordered it. They’ll kill me.”
A twinge of nervous irritation zipped through her. The man had left her on the altar; now he wanted to joke about wine like they were old chums. Out on the lake, boat lights winked and bobbed. The hum of the restaurant patrons made the silence between them a little less awkward.
Her lessons on dressing well seemed to have stuck with Jeremy; he looked like a model for Ralph Lauren now, a red V-neck sweater over a cream-colored button down, dark washed jeans. His hair was a little shorter than it used to be, and it suited him.
“So Levi told me he’s seen you a couple times,” he said.
“Yes. Good old Levi,” Faith said, managing to keep the snark out of her voice. “You two are still close?”
“Oh, yeah.” Jeremy put the napkin in his lap, then took a deep breath. “I’ve been really nervous about seeing you,” he admitted. “I woke up at four this morning.”
So they’d been awake at the same time. Funny, that.
“It’s been a while,” she said, surreptitiously wiping her damp hands on her napkin.
Jeremy pressed his lips together. “I guess I was a little worried about how you’d feel. If you’d slap my face or throw your drink at me.”
“Hi, Dr. Lyon!” called a plump woman with pinkish hair. “My knee is so much better! It should be, with all the fluid you drained out of it!”
“Oh, good, Dolores. Glad to hear it.”
“Two hundred cc’s! I think I hold a record!” the woman said gleefully.
“Could be.” He glanced at Faith. “Sorry. Where were we?”
“Drink-throwing and slaps,” she said. “Thanks for the ideas.”
Jeremy gave a crooked smile and rubbed his chin. “Can we get that out of the way? Do you hate me?”
“No, Jeremy. Of course not. I told you that, right after the wedding. A few times. More than a few.”
“Yeah, you did,” he said. “But that was in the early days. I thought maybe as time went on, you’d get...I don’t know. Angry. You never wanted to see me when you were back in town, so...”
There was a long pause. “I needed to get over you,” she said as quietly as she could. “It wasn’t because I hated you. It was because I loved you.”
His eyes filled again, and he nodded.
“Hey, Doc!” someone called. “Oh, lord, you’re with Faith! Hi, Faith, honey!”
“Hi,” Faith said. Clearly, meeting in public had been a bad idea. “I have no idea who that is,” she murmured.
“Joan Pepitone,” Jeremy murmured. “Big Frankie’s mom.”
“Are you two getting back together?” Frankie’s mother asked.
“No, Mrs. Pepitone,” he said. “Just having dinner.”
“Okay, then,” she whispered. “I’ll leave you two kids alone.”
“Anyway,” Faith said. “It wasn’t anything but—”
“Here we go!” Jessica announced, sticking the bottle in Jeremy’s face so he could see the label.
Jeremy nodded, and Jess began uncorking the bottle.
There were times when Faith really hated all the rituals that went along with wine. Jeremy picked up the cork; it wasn’t crumbly. Jessica poured him an ounce; he swirled and smelled it, then nodded. Jess poured Faith a glass, then Jeremy, then started reciting the specials.
“Jess, if you don’t mind, we’ll let you know when we’re ready, okay?” Jeremy said, smiling up at her.
“Sure, pal,” she said. “Take all the time you want.” She gave Faith a look that wasn’t nearly as warm as the one she’d just leveled at Jeremy and finally left. Couldn’t have been more than a size four, just in case she wasn’t already a pain in the butt.
Faith straightened out her cutlery, then took a sip of wine, smiling awkwardly at Jeremy. He smiled back. All smiles, all the time.
“Jeremy,”
