helped her unbuckle her helmet and held it as she shook out her hair. The sky was a deep blue, the scalding sun was trying its best to break through his sunscreen, and all around them cactuses sprang like gnarly hands from the dusty ground.
They’d left Esme playing on the beach with Jess and some other kids, and he’d seized his chance to get Sara alone—finally.
‘They’re so smooth and weird-looking,’ she said about the rocks, stepping forward along the dusty path.
He couldn’t help but see her bikini bottoms through her sarong; the curve of her ass. ‘How did they get here?’
‘No one really knows,’ he said. Some people think aliens brought them here.’
She smiled. ‘“ET phone home”?’ Her fuchsia sarong was billowing softly around her in the breeze. God, she was so beautiful. He could tell she didn’t really know it. He wondered if there had been anyone serious in her life, since Esme’s dad, and felt a sharp twinge of jealousy.
Sprinting onto a nearby rock ahead of her, he held a hand down. On the top of the huge, flat boulder, he watched Sara’s face as she looked at Aruba, stretching out beneath their feet. They were about three kilometres from the capital, Oranjestad, where the ship was docked.
‘On a clear day you can see Venezuela from here,’ he told her, taking in the dusty browns, and then the emerald-greens and clear blues of the waters beyond. ‘The first inhabitants from the Arawak tribe used to climb on these boulders and watch for storms on the eastern horizon.’
Sara lifted her sunglasses to her head and looked at him. ‘You always did absorb this kind of stuff like a sponge. No wonder you took this job.’
He smiled, ran his eyes over her lips. ‘How long did you say you’ve been doing these cruises?’
‘This is only my second.’
He brushed a strand of hair from her face, gently. It coiled around his fingers. She didn’t move, but she averted her gaze. Did he make her uncomfortable out here? Memories were funny things. He wanted to say he remembered the curves of her body, the way she’d used to moan when he pressed kisses on her ticklish tummy. But she’d made it quite clear that she wanted things to stay professional between them. He had to respect that.
‘I know you love to see the world, but I still don’t get why you’re here—working, I mean.’
Sara lowered herself onto the rock and he did the same. She hugged her sarong-wrapped knees to her chest.
‘You were pretty married to your family’s practice, from what I recall.’
He was quiet for a moment and the birds sang in the silence.
‘My father died two years ago,’ he told her, watching a warbler flit from a tall bush. ‘I put a locum in—just to get away for a while, you know? I did the cruise and really enjoyed it, and they asked me back for a second this year.’
‘I’m so sorry.’ Sara put a hand to his on top of his raised knee. Her voice was tight. ‘About your dad. Fraser, I didn’t know.’
‘It was a heart attack.’
He missed his father, of course—he’d grown up worshipping the guy—but he’d never come to terms with the fact that his dad had resented his and Sara’s relationship six years ago. Dr Philip Breckenridge had been an excellent doctor, but managing the finances of the practice had never been his strong point.
The money Fraser’s late grandfather had left in trust for him was to have been released to him when Fraser qualified, on the proviso that he spent it to further his career. By pumping it back into the practice, Fraser would appease the practice trustees and save his parents from an uncertain retirement.
But when he’d gone to tell Sara he needed some time to concentrate on qualifying, so the money for the practice could be released, even knowing it wasn’t great timing because her mother had just died, she’d already made her mind up.
‘We should just call it a day, Fraser. It’s too crazy right now; everything is changing.’
Her movement beside him startled him back to the present. Sara had turned to face him, cross-legged on the rock.
‘I mean it, you know; I really am sorry about your dad, Fraser.’
‘Thank you.’
‘I know what it’s like to lose a parent.’ She curled her fingers around his, holding both his hands in the space between them.
His mind flashed back to them walking hand in hand around Edinburgh Castle, taking photos of each other on the cannons. She’d known grief herself then, of course, and he’d wanted to keep on helping her through it. He’d wanted her with or without all the problems surrounding them at the time.
But when he’d gone to London to see her, shortly afterwards, to tell her that he missed her and ask if they could figure things out somehow, he’d seen her with that...that guy.
‘So, you live at home with your dad?’ he asked her now. ‘Because of Esme?’
He dropped her hands, took a bottle of water from his pack and took a swig, then splashed some against his face and chest.
‘That’s one of the reasons,’ she said.
He noticed her eyes giving his abs an appreciative glance through his open shirt. He handed her the water.
‘Haven’t you ever moved in with a boyfriend, or...fiancé or anything? What about Esme’s father? I saw you with him once, you know.’
Sara’s eyes grew wide. She paused with her lips to the bottle and he realised he probably shouldn’t have admitted it.
‘You saw us?’ she said. ‘When?’
He shrugged. ‘I’m assuming it was him. I came to see you in London a couple of weeks after you left. You’d already made it obvious you wanted to move on, but I guess I thought I could change your mind. I saw you with him outside that restaurant in your street...’
‘You really did that? Came to London to see me?’ She looked grief-stricken all over again for a moment. ‘I can’t believe you did that.’
He could see he’d upset her, but he had to ask. ‘Would it have made a difference? If you’d seen me?’
She was quiet. ‘I don’t know. That was the one and only time we met, Fraser. We spent one night together and then he left the country for a job without ever knowing I got pregnant. It was a stupid thing to do, but I was still grieving for mum, and missing you, and for once in my life I’d had way too much to drink...’
‘You don’t have to explain.’
‘So Esme wasn’t exactly planned—not that I have any regrets.’
‘Of course not. She’s incredible, Sara.’
‘She really is. I never knew I could love another human so much after...’
She trailed off, but he knew what she was going to say. After him.
