shied away from the memory. He would not permit that to happen again. Stephanie had reminded him of how it could be, and she had proved to him how much more it could be. A foretaste of his future, though of course, it would be a future without Stephanie in it.
His mind rebelled at this thought too. Rafiq shook his head at himself in exasperation. Why couldn’t he simply enjoy what he had while he had it! A woman who spoke to him, as if she saw straight through his princely façade. No one had ever dared do that before. She forced him to look at the world afresh. His plans for Bharym and his people were no longer hazy, but shifting sharply into focus. The weight of his guilt was as heavy as ever, but it was no longer an intrinsic part of him. He carried it still, but it was a separate burden, one which he was preparing to discard for ever.
When the sickness was cured. When the Sabr was won. He had faith in Stephanie. What he lacked was faith in himself. Gazing out the high window, Rafiq saw that the stars had made their appearance. The sky was inky blue. It was very late. Like Stephanie, he would learn from his mistakes. Like Stephanie, he would be become a different person.
* * *
Waiting for Rafiq at the stables the next afternoon, Stephanie was finding it difficult to remind herself that she was the Royal Horse Surgeon awaiting the Prince. Studying herself in the mirror last night, back in the harem, she had seen a wanton woman. A sensual woman, who was beginning to understand just exactly what the word sensual meant. When she touched him. When he touched her. There was a mutual delight in it. Last night, their bodies had communed. Their physical differences were fascinating, but their identical responses even more so. Pleasure echoing pleasure.
Last night had not satisfied her curiosity, merely whetted her appetite. She had learned that lovemaking was about looking and touching and talking and listening, it was the taste of his skin and scent of him, and the shivering sensations they triggered and shared. She smiled to herself. Pleasure. Mutual pleasure. Those illustrations were no longer shocking, they were intriguing. She still wasn’t convinced by Tail of the Ostrich, but Love’s Fusion—yes, she could imagine that, and the other one, where his body was nestled into her back—that was a very delightful image indeed. Her body delighted Rafiq, and Rafiq’s delight delighted her. It was a heady feeling, knowing the effect she could have on him, it made her want to experiment further. It made her feel oddly powerful.
Though it also meant that now, watching him cross the courtyard towards her, she was struggling to suppress all these feelings, and to remember that she was a Royal Horse Surgeon with a difficult task to perform. She felt so different, yet he looked exactly the same. Ridiculously handsome. Sinfully attractive.
Stephanie got to her feet, pulling her keffiyeh over her face before he could read her thoughts. ‘The horses are ready, Your Highness. Let us make haste.’
* * *
After an hour examining the stallions’ enclosure, Stephanie could find no evidence to back up her theory, but was reluctant to admit defeat. ‘We must be missing something. Every case of the sickness has occurred seven or eight days after one of the stallions has been brought into the stables to cover a mare. Batal was infected because he was with Anadil when she was covered.’
‘But we have lost only one stallion. And there has not been a case of sickness every time,’ Rafiq said. ‘If it is the water, as you suggest...’
‘I know, they would all be infected. It doesn’t make sense, yet there is a logic to it, Rafiq. It is the only discernible pattern. We must be missing something obvious.’
‘Well, whatever it is, we are not going to find it today. It is too hot to ride back at the moment, let’s rest in the shade for a time.’
On the other side of the enclosure, away from the horses, the oasis was beautifully tranquil. The air was sweetly scented, the palm-covered island in the centre of the pool a lush haven. Perched on the low stone wall of the little bridge, Stephanie could see her reflection in the still blue waters, with Rafiq standing beside her, frowning over at the high wall. He wore English-style leather riding breeches today, and long boots. His shirt was white, with wide sleeves, open at the neck. He had discarded his headdress as soon as they had arrived. His hair was dishevelled, clinging damply to his brow, just as it had yesterday in the library, when he was naked and aroused. And then naked and sated. She had brought that about. Just thinking about it made her feel giddy. So she’d better stop thinking about it.
A breeze flitted through the palm trees, making them rustle. In the paddock, one of the stallions whinnied. Rafiq sat on the wall beside her. Beneath them, the water was crystal clear, like a mirror.
Exactly like a mirror. There was her face and Rafiq’s side by side. He smiled at her. She smiled back. Their heads drew closer until their temples touched.
‘I have been giving what you confided in me last week regarding your past a great deal of thought,’ he said. ‘I cannot accept that you were in any way to blame. Surely there must be some way of bringing this man who seduced you to book.’
‘Rafiq, I made love to him because I wanted to, and it was, frankly, now that I know better, a disappointing and frankly dreadful experience, but that is beside the point. It was my choice, and until lately I have deeply regretted it.’
‘What has made you think differently?’
Stephanie chose her words carefully. ‘I too have thought about it a great deal since last week, more clearly than I have been able to since it happened. Distance gives perspective, and hindsight is a marvellous thing. You know, I wasn’t unhappy working with Papa, but I was beginning to question whether I wanted to spend my entire life doing so. I was looking for something more, something different, although I couldn’t articulate what it was. Perhaps that’s one of the reasons I thought myself in love, I don’t know. But I do know that if I had not taken the path to ruin, I would not have been granted this opportunity, for Papa would never have permitted me to come to Arabia otherwise. What I’m trying to say, in a very roundabout way, is not that I would gladly make the same mistake again, but having already made it, I need have no more regrets.’
‘But that man...’
‘Rupert is weak, and he is dishonourable, and he is a liar The world did not extract a punishment from him for those sins, while I was forced to pay beyond price by my shame, but it’s that same shame which has obliged me to take responsibility for my own life. My total lack of judgement still takes my breath away. I will never, ever be so stupid again. But I’m done with looking over my shoulder, I want only to look forward, to the future. So I’m not in the least bit interested in revenge. Do you see?’
‘To be done with regrets, to be done with looking back—yes, that I do understand.’
Though his eyes were hooded, his tone was bleak. ‘Fear not, I will help you cure this sickness,’ Stephanie said, touching his knee. ‘You will win the Sabr as you promised you would.’
Her words, to her relief, had the desired effect. He smiled. ‘I cannot help but wish that blackguard could be punished for what he did to you, but I cannot bring myself to regret the fact that it has led to your presence here in my kingdom.’
Their shoulders were touching. And their arms. And their thighs. Her heart began to race. He turned to her and stroked her hair. ‘Last night was utterly delightful.’
‘Yes,’ Stephanie said with a sigh, ‘it was. Will we ascend another step some time soon?’
He kissed her tenderly. ‘Soon enough, but we both have business to attend to, and I will not rush this business. You are a woman who deserves to be
