She’d hardly slept, her thoughts going round and round in circles. She’d regretted dismissing Hal so coldly and wished the words unsaid. Her husband was an unkind man and she feared him more now that he had become a harsh stranger, barely speaking to her unless absolute necessary, than she had when he had visited her bed and abused her both physically and verbally.
When he looked at her now she saw calculation in his eyes and wondered what he was planning.
Feeling close to desperation, she sat down at her desk and wrote a short note to Hal, begging him to meet her again in the park. She wanted to apologise, to make her peace with him and try to explain why she could never be the wife for him even if she were free. How could she when she feared that her husband had destroyed her ability to respond to physical love?
Lethbridge had abused her both physically and mentally; the physical scars were slight and soon mended, but she feared that he had made it impossible for her to welcome a man’s kisses...his loving...even if that man were the only one she’d ever loved.
When Hal had kissed her in the gardens on the day of Jenny and Adam’s wedding, she’d wanted to melt into his arms but then, suddenly, a feeling of fear and revulsion had made her draw back. How could she bear anyone to touch her intimately after...? Even the thought turned her cold and caused an acid sickness in her throat.
Her mind told her that it would be different with Hal, because he was a gentleman and he loved her, but her body had learned to fear the intimate side of marriage.
Somehow, she must explain to Hal. Tell him that she loved him, but could never accept him as a lover. She could never bear anyone to touch her again for she was soiled...shamed beyond bearing.
Her eyes filled with tears as she sealed her letter and summoned Sally. Even though she knew the future held nothing for her, she longed to see Hal just once more...
Madeline encountered her husband as she went downstairs just after noon the following day. She had been hoping to escape to the park, where, if he’d received her letter, she hoped Hal would come to meet her. Her heart raced with fear for she saw her husband’s icy eyes and knew he would question her about her intentions.
‘You know that the Marquis of Rochdale is dining with us this evening, Madeline. You should wear the green gown I had made for you in Paris—and do not wear a fichu in the neck. Instead, wear your diamonds.’
‘I do not like that gown, it is too low and reveals too much. It makes me look like a whore,’ Madeline said, her cheeks flushed. Did he intend to humiliate her? ‘The marquis...he is not what you think him, Lethbridge. He may think...he may believe I wear the gown for his benefit.’
‘That is exactly what I wish him to believe,’ Lethbridge said. ‘If he wants to touch or kiss you, you should allow it. I want something from him and if he wants you, then he may have you. You have given me nothing and I may as well get some benefit from all you have cost me.’
Madeline stared at him in horror, her worst fears confirmed. ‘Am I to understand that you would condone...a liaison between us?’
‘Why not?’ her husband sneered, his thick lips curving unpleasantly. ‘You are of no use to me. I might as well lie with a block of wood. Rochdale has something I desire more than I ever desired you, madam. If he will take you in exchange, then good luck to him.’
‘How dare you suggest such a thing to me?’ Madeline cried in utter disgust. ‘You have gone too far, Lethbridge. I shall not do what you ask and I shall leave you. By insulting me so you set me free of any debt of honour I felt towards you. Our marriage is at an end. I no longer owe you any duty.’
‘Damn you,’ he muttered and moved towards her. One hand grabbed her wrist and she saw that he was considering whether to strike her. ‘No, I shall not punish you yet. I would not have you ill before he takes what he wants. But after he has done with you, I shall teach you to obey me. You will not defy me again, madam.’
‘No, I shall not allow it. No matter what you threaten. I shall run away—’
‘Then I’ll lock you in your room until he arrives.’ Lethbridge grabbed her by the hand and started to drag her with him, out into the hall and up the stairs.
Madeline struggled against him, crying out as his fingers dug into her soft skin, but although the servants saw her struggling none attempted to help her. They dared not. He would have them thrashed and they would be dismissed without a reference, cast out without hope of finding another employer. It was useless to ask for help and she did not, though she fought him all the way, but to no avail. He was much too strong for her. She was thrust into her bedchamber, her husband standing in the doorway, glaring at her.
‘Make yourself ready to receive the marquis this evening,’ Lethbridge growled before the door closed. ‘Please him or I shall beat you until you weep for mercy—and I’ll ruin your father.’
‘You may do what you wish to me,’ Madeline said defiantly. ‘I shall run away as soon as I can and you may do your worst.’
‘If you think to run to your lover, think again,’ Lethbridge muttered. ‘I know who he is and I shall kill him.’
‘I have no lover.’
‘I saw you with him in the gardens at Miss Hasting’s wedding—and you’ve been seen with him in the park and other places. Do not try to deny it, madam. I had not decided what to do to him, but it would be better to have him dead. Then you will not have foolish ideas of escaping me by running to Ravenscar.’
Madeline gasped, feeling the colour drain from her face. He knew of Hal! His words were not merely bluff or vain threats this time—she’d been seen in the park with Hal.
‘Yes, I see your guilt and by it you seal his fate,’ Lethbridge said. ‘Tonight you will play the whore for my guest. If you do not, you know what will happen.’
Hearing the door slam and the key turn, Madeline sagged with despair. Hal was in danger. It hardly mattered what her husband did to her now for if Hal were lost to her for ever she did not care if she died.
Sinking down on the edge of the bed, she bent her head and wept. She should have gone with Hal when she had the chance.
Lethbridge would give her to the marquis in return for something he craved. Clearly, he no longer valued her and, perhaps, wished to be rid of her. Was he planning to bring his bastard here—and his mistress? Or did he simply wish to be free of a wife whom he thought of as useless? If she were forced to lie with the marquis, her husband could claim that she had betrayed her vows and divorce her. She would be utterly ruined and ostracised from society.
It was a fiendishly clever plan for he gained something he craved and rid himself of an unwanted wife in one swoop.
‘My lady, you must come now,’ Sally’s voice called to her. Madeline looked towards the dressing-room door and saw her maid beckoning to her. ‘Your husband has gone out and we have a carriage waiting for you—but you must come quickly before he returns.’
‘Sally, you know what he would do to you if he catches us?’
‘I would give my life for you,’ Sally said and smiled bravely. ‘I have packed a bag for you, my lady.
