she thought ruefully, and she almost smiled—but, of course, she didn’t. She simply held Ruby until the sobs receded, until Ruby tugged away and grabbed a handful of tissues. That was a bit late. Em’s shoulder was soaked, but who cared? How many times had Em ever finished a shift clean? She could count them on one hand. She always got her hands dirty, one way or another.
And it seemed, so did Oliver, for he was still there. Most consultants would have fled at the first sign of tears, Em thought. As a breed, surgeons weren’t known for their empathy.
He’d risen, but he was standing by the door, watching, and there was definitely sympathy. Definitely caring.
He was holding the two halves of his laptop. The screen had completely split from the keyboard. And the screen itself … smashed.
‘Whoops,’ she said, as Ruby blew her nose.
He glanced down at the ruined machine. ‘As you say, whoops.’
And as Ruby realised what he was holding, the teenager choked on something that was almost a laugh. ‘Em’s smashed your computer,’ she said, awed. ‘Do you mind?’
‘I can’t afford to mind.’
‘Why not?’ She was caught, pulled out of her misery by a smashed computer.
‘Priorities,’ he said. ‘You. Baby. Computer. In that order.’
‘What about Em?’ she asked, a touch of cheekiness emerging. ‘Is she a priority?’
‘Don’t you dare answer,’ Em told him. ‘Not until you’ve checked that your computer is covered by insurance. Ruby, if you’re rethinking your plans to adopt …’
‘I think … I might be.’
‘Then let’s not make any decisions yet,’ she said, hurriedly. Surely now wasn’t the time to make such an emotional decision? ‘Let’s get this operation over with first.’
Ruby took a deep breath and looked from Oliver to Emily and back again. ‘Maybe I do need a bit of time,’ she conceded. ‘Maybe a sleep … time to think.’
‘Of course you do.’ She pulled up her covers and tucked her in. ‘Ruby, nothing’s urgent. No decisions need to be made now. Just sleep.’
‘Thank you. And, Dr Evans …’
‘Mmm?’ Oliver was about to leave but turned back.
‘I hope your computer’s all right.’
‘It will be,’ he said. But it wouldn’t. Em could see the smashed screen from where she stood. ‘But even if it’s not, it’s not your problem,’ he said, gently now, almost as a blessing. ‘From here on, Ruby, we don’t want you to worry about a thing. You’ve put yourself in our hands and we’ll keep you safe. Em and I are a great team. You and your baby are safe with us.’
His lovely, gentle bedside manner lasted until they were ten feet from Ruby’s door. Em closed the door behind her, looked ahead—and Oliver was staring straight at her. Vibrating with anger.
‘You’re planning on talking her out of keeping her baby?’
The turnabout from empathy to anger was shocking. The gentleness had completely gone from his voice. What she saw now was fury.
She faced him directly, puzzled. ‘What are you saying? I didn’t. I’m not.’
‘You are. She’d decided on adoption but now she’s changing her mind. But you stopped her.’
‘I didn’t stop her. I’d never do that.’ She thought back to the scene she’d just left, trying to replay her words. ‘I just said she had time …’
‘You told her not to make a decision now. Why not? Right now she’s thinking of keeping her baby. You don’t think it’s important to encourage her?’
‘I don’t think it’s my right to direct her one way or another.’ She felt herself getting angry in response. ‘All I saw in there was a frightened, tired kid who’s facing major surgery tomorrow. Who needs to stay calm and focused. Who doesn’t need to be making life-changing decisions right now. She’s already decided enough.’
‘But maybe when you’re emotional, that’s the time to make the decision. When she knows she loves her baby.’
‘She’ll always love her baby.’ Em was struggling to stay calm in the face of his anger—in the face of his accusation? ‘Ruby is a seventeen-year-old, terrified kid with no family support at all. If she decides to keep this baby, it’ll change her life for ever. As it will if she gives it up for adoption. What I did in there—and, yes, I interceded—was give her space. If she wants to keep her baby, she’ll need every ounce of strength and then some.’
‘She’ll get support.’
‘And she can never be a kid again. But, then, after this, maybe being a kid is no longer an option. But I agree, that’s none of my business. Oliver, is this discussion going anywhere? I’ve been away from the birthing suites for over an hour and I don’t know what’s going on. I may well be needed.’
‘You won’t influence her?’
‘Why would I influence her?’
‘Because you believe in adoption.’
‘And you don’t? Because of what happened to you when you were a kid?’ Anger was washing over her now. Yes, she should get back to the birthing suites but what was it he was accusing her of? ‘Get over it, Oliver. Move on. Not every adoptive mother is like yours, and not every birth mother is capable of loving. There’s a whole lot of grey in between the black and white, and it’s about time you saw it.’
‘So you won’t encourage her to adopt?’
‘What are you expecting me to do?’ She was confused now, as well as angry. She put her hands on her hips and glared. ‘Are you thinking I might pop in there, offer to adopt it myself and get myself another baby? Is that what you’re thinking?’
‘I would never—’
‘You’d better not. A midwife influencing a mother’s decision is totally unethical. How much more so is a midwife offering to adopt? I’ll do neither. I have my kids, Oliver, and I love them to bits. I have no wish for more.’
‘But Gretta’s going to die.’
Why had he said it? It had just come out, and he could have bitten his tongue from his head. Em’s face bleached white and she leaned back against the wall for support.
Dear heaven … What sort of emotional drop kick was he? Suggesting one kid was going to die so she was lining up for another? Where had the thought come from?
It was confusion, he thought. Maybe it was even anger that she’d got on with her life without him.
Or maybe it was sheer power of testosterone washing through him—because the woman who should be his wife was looking at him as if he was a piece of dirt.
Where to start with apologies?
