beach and told himself that this was the life he had chosen. And he had chosen it carefully. He never wanted to be tied down, or have people reliant on or beholden to him.
Not his patients—he fixed what he could and let them get on with their lives.
Not his family—they all knew how that had worked out.
And certainly he did not need someone who decided what he might want to eat for breakfast!
Damned cheek, Zack decided, and headed back to the hotel.
He went to the bar because it really was that easy, only it wasn’t so easy tonight because he didn’t want company.
Only his own.
Back up to his room he went and the bed had been turned down, the towels and soaps all replaced, and Zack found himself kicking his backpack across the room.
IT HURT.
Far, far more than the end of any other relationship ever had.
Even though Zack would insist that it hadn’t been a relationship because he didn’t do that type of thing.
‘Men!’ Freya said to Cleo as they stood in the little patch of garden early one morning, more than a week after their row.
She carried her back up the stairs and, instead of driving to work, Freya decided that she would run. She hadn’t run all week, she’d been huddled on the sofa at night with Cleo and busy with work by day.
It was time to get back on track with her schedules. She had a change of clothes at work so she pulled on her running gear and put in her earphones and did what she loved to do. She arrived at work all hot and sweaty and stood bent over in the stunning foyer.
‘James will have you using the side entrance,’ Zack said as he went past, and Freya actually laughed.
She wasn’t the prettiest sight for such expensive surroundings but she felt better for a run and glad that she and Zack were almost at the point they could acknowledge each other in passing.
There was a meeting with James this morning and Zack would be there so Freya wasn’t looking forward to it one bit.
She walked into the changing rooms and they were like a luxury spa. There was soft music and fluffy towels and Freya stepped under the delicious jets of water, and then everything shifted.
Her legs started to shake and Freya went dizzy. She didn’t even turn off the taps, she just stepped out and grabbed at a towel then sat on the bench with her head down.
‘Freya?’
She could hear Stephanie’s voice and it seemed to be coming from a long way off, except her face was right next to her ear.
‘I’m okay,’ Freya said.
‘You’re ever so white.’
‘I just need a moment,’ Freya said. ‘Could you get me some tea?’
The waiting rooms all had oolong tea, kept warm by a candle, and little glasses and so it was just a couple of moments before Stephanie returned.
By then Freya had put on a robe and was a bit more together. ‘Sorry about that,’ she said.
‘It’s fine.’ Stephanie smiled. ‘I saw that you ran in. Maybe you overdid it.’
‘Maybe,’ Freya said, and she felt a twist of indignation because she knew the implication behind Stephanie’s words. She had, in fact, underdone things this week but it was always there, the feeling that everyone was waiting for her to slide back into ways of old.
Even James, Freya thought.
They made no mention of her past, it was a subject he avoided, but she could always see the concern in his eyes.
She didn’t need it.
And it was one of the things she had loved about Zack. He hadn’t raised his eyes at her ways, he had let her be, and she missed him so much.
So much.
Over and over she tried to tell herself it had just been a few weeks, that you couldn’t fall in love in that time, and certainly it wasn’t love if it was unrequited.
‘I’m fine now,’ Freya said, and put down the little cup but she knew she was going to throw up. ‘Honestly.’
Please, go now, she thought.
Freya walked to the toilet and closed the door and she wished Stephanie would leave as she threw up the tea as quietly as she could.
No, Freya thought, she hadn’t overdone her run—the nausea and dizzy spells were for different reasons altogether.
How the hell could she ever tell Zack that she was pregnant?
Freya put on her grey dress with capped sleeves and did her hair and make-up and then she had another glass of tea and that one was nice.
Feeling a whole lot better, she arrived at the meeting room.
‘Where’s Zack?’
‘He’s talking to your good friend Mila about another patient.’
Freya ignored the dig and James got down to business and said he would, as of today, be starting to put out the feelers for a new cardiac surgeon to replace Zack. ‘Already?’
‘Well, if they have to give notice. I just asked Zack if he’d go on a month-to-month contract but he said no, he’s out of here at the end of March.
‘And it’s February today.’ James said.
So it was.
‘Morning.’ Zack came into the meeting room with no apologies for being late and she and James shared a small smile.
He was such an arrogant bastard.
Even down to the fact they were having this meeting in a meeting room when usually they’d be in James’s office for such things.
Zack played second fiddle to no one.
‘I can’t stay long,’ Zack said. ‘I’ve got a patient that’s not doing well on NICU.’
‘I heard,’ James said. ‘Are you going to operate?’
‘I don’t know. I’ve just spoken with Mila and we’re trying to schedule Bright Hope patients. I want to squeeze an ablation onto the end of the Sunday list on the fourteenth.’
‘That’s Valentine’s Day.’ James raised an eyebrow. ‘Won’t you want to be finishing up early?’
‘Same as any other day to me,’ Zack responded. ‘I’m an incurable unromantic.’
James
