her teeth across her lower lip, she admitted quietly, “And that was true. I wasn’t myself that night.”
For a long time, Holden had let himself believe that.
Now, cognizant of the tension that charged the air between them, he studied the mixture of regret and longing in her eyes. Found himself theorizing before he could stop himself, “And maybe you were yourself, Libby. Maybe your instincts were right.”
Another shadow crossed her eyes. “What are you saying?”
Holden looked at the gold broken-heart pendant shimmering against the delicate ivory of her skin. Lower still, he could see the hint of cleavage in the V neckline of her black cashmere sweater dress. “That if I hadn’t been such a gentleman … If I had allowed us to follow through on our urges …”
Maybe she wouldn’t have held him at arm’s length all this time. Maybe they could have shrugged off that flare of desire and gone back to being friends. Kissed and found out there was no chemistry between them, after all. Or argued and cleared the tension that way.
Instead, they had been adult about it. Distant. Careful. Unerringly polite. And tense as could be.
Libby studied him with a brooding look. “I know you’re trying to be gallant here, Holden. But we have to face facts. I was the one who wanted to kiss you that night. Not the other way around.”
Noting the raw vulnerability in her expression, Holden felt his heart go out to her all over again.
He realized it was his turn to be honest. No matter how much it complicated their lives. “You’re wrong about that, Libby,” he told her hoarsely.
His gaze lingered on her, as he paused to let his words sink in. “I would have given everything I had that night to see where that burst of physical attraction would lead.”
She shook her head. “But we couldn’t because I was a wreck. In some ways I still am a wreck.”
Not sure what she meant, Holden stared at her.
Libby lifted her hands. “It’s this house, Holden. The dealership. I can’t be either place without feeling like Percy’s wife.” Her voice caught and her lower lip trembled. “That’s the real reason I can’t stay here in Laramie. If I do, I’ll never be able to move on.”
As Holden looked around, he saw what she meant.
The home was brimming with signs of Percy and his folks, and the generations who had lived here before that.
It was clearly a Lowell domain.
Holden recalled that Libby had suggested a few small changes after they had taken over the residence, when Percy was still alive. All had been gently but firmly refused. Libby, in her usual genial way, had stopped bringing up the subject. And although she could have redecorated since Percy died, she hadn’t. Probably because it would have felt disloyal, an insult to his memory, or disrespectful to his wishes.
No wonder she felt trapped, Holden mused sympathetically. He edged closer. “You want to get married again?”
Determination stiffened her slender frame. “Of course. I want to fall in love. I want to have kids. I want to feel like everything good is still ahead of me.”
Everything she would have had, Holden thought, on a fresh wave of guilt, had her husband still been alive.
“Then you’re going to have to do a lot more than just sell the dealership and the house,” he told her sternly. “You’re going to have to start dating again.”
Libby eyed him mockingly. “Thank you, Dr. Phil.”
“I’m serious.”
“I know you are.” Her hips swaying provocatively, she strode past him toward the kitchen.
Like every other room in the house, it had been decorated long before Libby arrived on the scene. And although the color scheme was okay—if you liked bleached oak cabinets and beige walls—the once top-of-the-line appliances were definitely showing their age. As were some of the wall hangings and wooden blinds.
“The only problem is, no one will ask me out.”
She hit the switch, flooding the room with light, then headed for the fridge.
Holden followed her lazily. Glad she had decided to do something to distract them from the new tension between them, he watched her rummage through the contents until she emerged with a chocolate-and-peppermint Yule log from the local bakery.
His mouth watering for more than the sweet, he settled against the counter.
“That’s because you’re still putting out the I’m-a-widow-and-therefore-off-limits-to-anyone-with-any-sensitivity vibe.”
Libby stood on tiptoe to reach the dessert plates. “I am not.”
He came forward to help her, steadying her with a hand to her waist. “Yeah … you are.” He finished getting the dishes down for her. “But we can fix that.”
Her lips pursed stubbornly. “How?” she asked, cutting two slices and handing him one, complete with a fork.
Holden settled opposite her at the table. Their knees touched momentarily. Regretting the contact—and the sizzle of warmth it engendered—he pulled back and continued to focus on solving her problem. “By finding you a rebound guy.”
Libby frowned. “I get that you’re trying to help me, but why would you want any other guy to sign up for that—after what you went through with your ex?” She scowled protectively, like the close friend she had once been before their ill-fated kiss-that-never-quite-happened. “Heidi broke your heart! To the point that you’ve never dated seriously since.”
“I haven’t dated seriously because I haven’t found the right woman,” Holden corrected bluntly. “But I should put myself out there if I want to move on, too. And I do.”
Libby went very still. “What are you suggesting?”
Holden’s spirits rose as the idea took on momentum. “That we both shake off the rust. Get back in the game.”
Libby licked the frosting off the back of her fork. “By that you mean …?”
“Go out to dinner. Attend holiday parties. Really celebrate the season. Who knows? If you and I get back in the habit of dating again, it might give us both a whole new outlook on life.”
Libby’s soft lips took on an enticing curve. “Meaning what?” she murmured cynically. “I might be so content I won’t want to sell the dealership and move out of town?”
He grinned at her sarcasm and lifted a palm. “I’m just saying …”
Silence fell as the notion stuck. They studied each other.
Libby took the last bite of her dark chocolate cake, savoring the sweet decadence. “So, cowboy with all the answers, how do you propose I find my rebound man?”
Chapter Three
“You’re
