when she told him her news?
Get rid of it straight away. The words rebounded inside her.
And she realised with a sudden, frightening thud of reality that that wasn’t what she wanted at all. She wanted this baby.
‘When you’ve sorted the situation, phone me back.’ Alexi hung up and glanced over at her.
For a moment there was silence between them.
She wanted their child, and she wanted Alexi to take her into his arms and tell her that everything would be OK.
She really was losing her grip on reality now, she thought angrily, because when she told him her news there was no way that was going to happen.
‘So, how was the shopping?’ Alexi took his jacket off and she was momentarily distracted by the sheer power of his body, the way his broad shoulders tapered down to the narrow hips.
‘It was OK.’ She tried to smile coolly.
‘Did you get what you wanted?’
The question and the way his eyes flicked over her made the tension inside her escalate.
‘Yes, thanks.’ Somehow she managed to sound controlled.
She looked around her. Through an open doorway she could see a large double-bed. Swiftly she pulled her gaze away from that and concentrated on the lounge area where they were standing.
White, curving leather furniture followed the round contours of one side of the room, and to the other side large sliding doors gave a spectacular view out over a private deck and swimming pool. The soaring Manhattan skyline in the distance was a dramatic backdrop.
‘You looked deep in thought outside the door.’ The sudden observation made her look back at him with a frown.
‘What do you mean?’
He waved towards a security monitor on the wall that showed the outside corridor, and she realised he’d been watching her when she’d stood outside.
‘There are cameras all over the place.’ He looked at her with a wry smile. ‘Part of the new security measures we have introduced.’
‘Very Big Brother,’ she said flippantly.
‘It has its uses.’ He glanced at his watch. ‘I ordered us lunch, by the way. I took a wild guess at what you would want.’
‘Did you? How very cavalier of you.’
Alexi glanced over and his eyes held a sudden gleam of amusement. ‘The house salad … and a side order of fries. Sound about right?’
It was what she had always ordered when they were having a working lunch. And she had always joked that she shouldn’t eat the fries, but that they were her one sin for the afternoon. And Alexi would smile and say we’ll see about that!
She didn’t want to remember things like that. She didn’t want to remember the ease and the passion between them—because it hadn’t been real, she reminded herself fiercely. And it didn’t help with this situation now.
She shrugged. ‘To be honest, I’m not really that hungry.’
He frowned. ‘Are you still feeling ill?’
‘No, I’m not ill.’ She looked away from him. ‘But you’re right, I should eat something. Thanks.’
Before he could comment further there was a knock on the door.
It was the staff with their lunch. Katie was very glad of the interruption. She watched as a table was put out on a shady part of the deck and laid with a pristine-white cloth and silverware. The scene looked inviting and intimate—nothing like a working lunch.
This was probably the best time to tell him. The knowledge thumped through her as they were left alone again.
Alex held the door open for her to precede him out to the table, and she practised the words in her head: Alexi, I think I’m pregnant. But don’t worry, I’ll deal with it myself.
The pronouncement filtered through her like ice water.
Being a single mother was going to be hard … really hard. Just say she made all the same mistakes her mother had made? Just say she went from one bad relationship to another and her baby never knew security, never knew a loving father. She stopped the panic-stricken thoughts before they could start to get a grip.
This wasn’t helping. Lots of women brought up children alone and they made a brilliant job of it. She would be one of those women—she was nothing like her mother.
‘Glass of wine?’ Alexi asked.
‘I won’t, thanks. We have a lot of work to get through this afternoon,’ she said firmly.
‘Always so sensible,’ he murmured.
She didn’t feel particularly sensible, she felt like she was drowning in a sea of reckless uncertainty. But she forced herself just to smile. ‘That’s one of the reasons you like having me around, isn’t it? Or so you used to tell me.’
‘One of the reasons … yes.’ His dark eyes seemed to burn into her. ‘The other reason is that you blend sexy with sensible so well. It’s a unique combination, very hard to resist.’
The husky words jarred inside her.
‘Don’t mock me, Alexi.’
He frowned, something in her tone touching him. She looked very young suddenly, and very vulnerable. ‘Katie, I wasn’t mocking you,’ he said quietly.
For a few short moments the air between them seemed to overflow with emotions that Katie couldn’t fathom. All she knew was that she wanted to go into his arms so badly that it hurt.
But there was no going back, she reminded herself firmly, especially now.
If she allowed him to touch her, allowed him to take her to bed, it would just be sex. Alexi had nothing to offer her in the way of commitment. There would always be the next conquest waiting for him.
Their eyes clashed across the table.
And maybe now wasn’t the right time to tell him about the baby. She didn’t think she was strong enough; her emotions were all over the place, and she needed to be really sure about what she wanted before she could discuss it with him.
She sought for a means of escape and found it in work. ‘How do you think my ideas went down at the meeting today?’ she asked, taking off her jacket, trying to act as if she didn’t notice the mood between them.
Alexi knew that she was deliberately hiding behind work. His eyes flicked down over her, noticing how her white shirt was unbuttoned just enough to show the lacy curve of her bra. He felt the heat of desire escalate inside him, and he wondered if he should allow her to hide from the real agenda between them quite so easily.
Then he looked back into her eyes and saw the glimmer of answering need, mixed with a sudden helplessness. It
