gestured to the tree. “What about the lights?”
“They’re on a timer. The apartment is as maintenance-free as I can make it. I’m gone so much.” She reached for the handle of her rolling bag.
He started toward her. “Let me get that.”
“Why? It’s my suitcase.” She released the handle, though, as if sensing he wouldn’t take no for an answer.
“But you’re my guest.” He came up beside her and grasped the handle.
“Your guest?” Her eyebrows lifted. “I thought I was your independent contractor.”
“You would have been if you’d allowed me to pay you.” Instead of kissing her, which was what he wanted to do, he rolled the suitcase across the thick carpeting to the door. “But now that you’ve insisted on doing the job for free, that makes you my guest.”
She followed him to the door. “I think you’re bossier than you used to be, Cole.”
“No, I’m not. I’ve always been this bossy.” Or so he’d been told by his siblings.
“Maybe you’re right.” Once they were out the door, she locked up and dropped the keys in her messenger bag. “I might not have noticed it because we spent so much time in bed, and I kind of like a man to be bossy in bed.”
His sharp intake of breath was pure reflex. He couldn’t have stopped himself from doing it if someone had put a gun to his head.
“Whoops. Did I say that out loud?”
He turned to her, his heart racing. “Yes, ma’am, you did.” He couldn’t tell from her expression if she’d truly slipped up or if the comment had been deliberate, like her line about the cat. She seemed unapologetic as she met his gaze, so he suspected the latter.
She quickly confirmed his suspicions. “I’m trying to figure you out, Cole, and I’m having a very tough time doing it. Sometimes, when you look at me, it’s like the old days, as if you’re ready to gobble me up. But then you turn all logical and businesslike, and claim that the only thing you care about is shoring up the database. Which is the real you?”
He gave the only answer he could come up with. “Both.”
“What the heck does that mean?”
“It’s complicated.”
“Apparently. And you seem really stressed about it.”
“That’s because I am.” How he hated to admit that.
She took a deep breath. “Okay. Can you explain what the issues are? Because I didn’t get that explanation ten years ago, and I’d appreciate hearing it now, before we hop on that plane.”
He wondered how he’d ever expected to get involved with her on a business level and keep it from morphing into something more personal. Of course it would. They’d been together less than an hour and it already had.
Facing her, he realized he’d missed a blindingly obvious fact. “That’s why you hacked in, isn’t it? To get that explanation.”
“Yes, it is. So if you’ll tell me, then I’ll go fix your computer system. All will be well.”
If only it were that easy. “Do you trust me?”
“In some things, yes. In other things, no.”
“Fair enough. I deserve that. Let me put it this way. Do you trust me to want the best for you?”
Her answer was a long time coming, but at last she nodded. “Of course you want the best for me. You’re a nice guy. But the problem with that is you can’t always know what’s best for me. I’m a far better judge of that than you are.”
“I’m sure that’s true in general. But in this particular situation I’m confident I know what’s best. You and I aren’t meant to be together.” Even though he knew that with a white-hot certainty, saying it cut like a knife.
She didn’t seem to like hearing it, either. “Why not?”
“I can’t tell you that. You have to trust me to know what I’m talking about.”
“Okay, look, before we walk down the hallway and get on the elevator, I need to know at least this much. Are you involved in criminal activity?”
That made him smile.
“It’s not funny! I care about you, but I’m not willing to be an accomplice!”
“You care about me?” The words warmed him more than he could say.
“Of course I do.” Her voice softened. “I’ll never forget our time together. Which is why, now that I’m about to turn thirty, I wanted closure on that relationship. I hacked in to get your attention and an explanation. You probably wish I hadn’t.”
“I’m not sorry you hacked in.” That popped out before he’d known he was going to say it, but once he had, he knew it to be true. This episode promised to be a challenge, but having a chance to see her again and talk with her was worth any inconvenience. He never tired of looking into her hazel eyes and imagining the wheels turning in that amazing brain.
“I’m glad you’re not sorry. Neither am I.” Without warning, she stepped forward and pressed her lips to his.
He’d been hanging tough until that moment, but as her velvet mouth made that achingly familiar connection, he came unglued. Her suitcase toppled to the floor when he let go of the handle, but the resulting clatter barely registered because he had Taryn in his arms again. A herd of reindeer could have stampeded through the hallway and he wouldn’t have noticed.
With a groan, he pulled her close, enveloping the whole package, including her bulky parka and her messenger bag. She could have been wearing a space suit for all he cared, as long as he had access to her sweet lips. This kiss, this Taryn kiss, had been ten years in the making, and he was desperate for it.
As he reveled in the remembered pleasures of her mouth, his world clicked into focus for the first time in ages. He hadn’t realized how blurred his view had been, but holding her made one thing crystal clear. She was the only woman he’d ever loved.
He was still cruising in the land of infinite joy when she grasped the back of his head in both hands.
Holding on tight, she drew back, depriving him of that amazing connection. “Open your eyes.”
He obeyed. In his current state of mind, he would have jumped from the eighteenth floor if she’d commanded him to.
“Tell me the truth, Cole. Are you a crook?”
He had to clear his throat before he could talk. “No.”
“Then what’s the problem?”
With his arms around her and his mouth inches from hers, he couldn’t think straight. She was the only person he’d ever known who could short-circuit his brain. “I can’t tell you.”
