stand any more of this. He should have talked with her sooner, done something sooner. But what? What did you tell your best friend who after ten years fell back into mourning the loss of her boyfriend? If there was a self-help book, he would have bought it by now. He hated seeing her unhappy, but she was her own worst enemy. She was the one keeping herself from happiness—real happiness, not the contrived happiness she had been living with for the last decade. She was only fooling herself. She deserved more than this.
And he definitely couldn’t handle this latest development. He was wound too tight.
When she’d walked into the kitchen this morning with her rumpled clothes, her curls going in every direction and a false eyelash stuck to her cheek, everything in him had wanted to continue what they had started the night before.
The moment her eyes met his and he felt the embarrassment she felt, he’d known he was being foolish. It could never, ever happen. He set his mind back on course, but the frustration and tension were too difficult to ignore. Instead of pushing her against the counter and kissing her the way he wanted to, he’d snapped at her and argued over cereal.
Josh shook his head. Apparently, this was how he was going to handle this situation: by being a grouch and pissing her off. Great idea, Josh. Real brilliant.
The image of Micah’s flaming hair spread out on his pillow left him breathless. Add in the fact that she was wearing his T-shirt and he was positive this had to be the most beautiful sight he had ever seen. He could feel the desire begin to take form deep in his gut as an intense urge pulled him closer. His hand moved on its own accord, desperate to touch the flames. If he touched would he get burned?
Josh yanked his hand back from her. Of course he would! Last night was proof enough for him. He was definitely playing with fire here.
He turned to leave, having done was he was supposed to and checked on her, making sure she was still breathing.
“Josh?”
Her sleepy voice almost did him in. Standing at the doorway with his back to her, he answered, “Yes?”
“What time is it?”
He found himself turning at the question. She rolled over in the bed and pushed her hair out of her face. He glanced at his watch. “A little after two.”
“Two in the afternoon?” She sat up in the bed, her curls in wild disarray, making her impossibly irresistible. He could not stand to look at her anymore, so he turned back and headed in the direction of the living room.
“Yup. You slept the day away. You want anything to eat? I just ordered a pizza.”
“Sounds good.”
He flipped on the TV, hoping to find something to distract him, but it wasn’t working. Micah helped herself to some water and came to sit next to him on the couch. He was aware of every move she made, every fidget, every sigh.
She wanted to talk. That much was obvious. But what was he supposed to say? In one stupid moment of weakness, he had brought about a whole new world of awkwardness between them. He’d really screwed this one up. Now he couldn’t look at her without seeing her eyes wide in shock and horror, her lips raw from his kiss. The mere task of sitting within two feet of one another on a couch watching television had adopted all sorts of new complications. Ten years of hard work thrown out the window in an instant.
He had to figure out some way to control the damage he had done. Ignoring it, as if it hadn’t happened, could only last so long. She would bring it up eventually. He needed to have a plan in place for when she did.
“So...”
She let the word stretch out, accentuating the resounding discomfort that sat between them.
Well, that didn’t last long. Don’t go there, Mike. Don’t go there.
“That kiss last night...”
She went there.
“And I thought I was the one who had too much to drink! Ha! No one was paying any attention to you. I had no clue you got that handsy when you drank.”
What? He’d only had one drink last night, but he wasn’t about to correct her. It would be so easy to blame it on the alcohol.
“You do always leave the bar with a girl. Never thought I would be added to that never-ending list of hookups.” She laughed again. There was an unmistakable pit in his stomach brought on by guilt.
“Obviously, we both had a little too much to drink. Honest mistake.” Stop talking, Mike. The look he sent her said as much.
“Okay, fine. I’ll drop it. It will be our little secret. Never to be talked about again. No one ever has to know. It will be like it never happened.”
He narrowed his eyes, but didn’t even have to look at her for her to get the point.
“Yeah. Sorry.”
Hopefully that would be the last time it was brought up. They had talked about it, gotten it out in the open. Good enough. Right?
She kept fidgeting. She tucked her feet under her and turned in his direction. Every inch of him was aware of every minute move she made. At least he should be grateful she had stopped talking.
“I had the weirdest dream last night...”
Josh released a deep sigh as he continued to flip through the channels, not really seeing what was flashing before him on the screen. He needed to get her home.
“Okay, fine. I won’t tell you about it.”
Now he was making her mad again. He was on a roll.
“No. Tell me.”
“I was just trying to start a conversation. You know I can’t handle awkward silences. Are you in a bad mood or something?”
“No.”
The silence that stretched between them was uncomfortable, and, well, excruciatingly painful. Minutes later she let out a frustrated sigh.
“I need a shower. Do you mind?”
Of course I mind! I don’t need any visuals of you in my shower!
Too late. The visuals were already there.
“Go ahead. Towels are in that small closet in the hall.”
He tried not to map out her movements based on the sounds coming from the bathroom, but no amount of control could stop his mind from picturing the hot water washing over her porcelain skin. The kiss from the night before had set this runaway train in motion. It was impossible to stop it now.
He shook his head to clear the image, but it was only replaced by another when he heard the water shut off. She had to be drying off at this point. How could he have fallen so far as to be envious of a drop of water or even a towel?
Stop now! This was dangerous territory. Frustration built at his obvious lack of self-control when it came to his thoughts concerning Micah. It threatened to boil over as she stepped out of the bathroom, a cloud of steam surrounding her.
She
