“...Drew’s gone to be with Jesus.”
Micah’s world collapsed. Her father held her tight as the gut-wrenching sobs took over. She felt robbed of air, robbed of thought. Robbed. It couldn’t be real. This couldn’t be happening. He was just with her. He had just kissed her good-night a couple hours ago.
It was all a lie! This was not happening! It couldn’t be true. It was his birthday! People weren’t supposed to die on their birthdays. Eighteen-year-olds weren’t supposed to die, period.
No. No. No. No. No. This couldn’t be real.
Micah jolted awake, sweat forming on her brow. She reached for her teddy bear, drawing comfort from it as the tears began to fall. Crying was her only way to release all of the emotions she still felt so vividly. No one would ever understand it. Even she didn’t understand how after years without Drew, the pain could just return with such vengeance.
Her mother had told her that grief was a unique emotion, that everyone’s experience was different. Some lasted longer than others. It was obvious the plan wasn’t working. Josh had been right. She had no way to control the dreams, and as long as the dreams kept coming the pain would never fully go away.
“Oh, Drew. Why do you keep doing this to me?”
She couldn’t handle it anymore. She desperately wanted to move on. It was only bringing up more pain and it hurt too much. She was drowning here, drowning in painful memories.
Josh couldn’t stop thinking about the conversation he’d had with Jamie. Was he just coming up with excuses? He had always been aware that deep down he had feelings for her. But what was he supposed to do about that?
Nothing. That’s what. He couldn’t act on them. It wouldn’t be right. He couldn’t take advantage of their years of friendship—no matter what he felt.
He needed a distraction, something that would take his mind off of Micah for longer than an afternoon. He needed to get a date. And soon.
He walked toward the exit of the fire station, his shift over.
“Excuse me.”
“Yeah?” Josh looked up to find a cute blond-haired woman standing next to the fire truck holding a cake. Distraction found. Wow, that was quick! “How can I help you?”
“The fire you guys put out yesterday was at my parents’ house. I just wanted to thank you. Because of you guys, my parents are alive. I can’t tell you how grateful I am.” She came closer to him, batting her eyelashes. “Here. I baked a cake for the station.”
“That wasn’t necessary, but we’ll take it, anyway. I, for one, have quite a sweet tooth.” He looked down at the cake as she handed it to him. Chocolate, frosted with the worst attempt at “thank you” written across the top. The u looked strange, different from the rest of the word. He inspected it closer, trying not to appear rude, but it had him curious. She started to giggle. He looked up to find her blushing bright pink.
“I have to make a confession. I ran out of white frosting so I used toothpaste at the end.”
“Oh.” What the heck? Toothpaste? It both grossed him out and made him laugh. “And just what made you think toothpaste would be a good idea?”
“Well, I figured that way your sweet tooth would be both satisfied and cleaned. Win-win.” A big white smile crossed her face. This girl was going to be fun.
“My name’s Josh Taylor. I don’t think I caught yours.”
“That’s funny. My name’s Taylor, too.” She flashed him a flirty grin that clearly showed she was interested. So was he. He would just have to talk to her about her multipurpose use of toothpaste.
“Well, come on in, Taylor. I’m sure the guys would love to meet you. And let’s not tell them about the toothpaste. That will be our little secret.”
He led the way into the firehouse to the common area. The guys were lounging on couches watching ESPN when they walked in the room. “Hey, guys. This is Taylor. She brought us a cake.”
That caught everyone’s attention. He couldn’t be sure if it was Taylor, the cake or the combination that brought them all to attention with a chorus of “Hi, Taylor.”
“We responded to the fire at her parents’ house yesterday.”
“Which one?”
“The one on Ninth.”
“Oh. How are they doing?”
“Good. They lost a lot of things, but it can all be replaced. We’re just happy they are both safe.”
“Do you have time for a piece of cake?” one of the guys asked her.
“No. I’ve got to get going. Thank you, though.”
“Thank you.”
“I just came to drop off the cake and tell you how much my parents and I appreciate all you did.”
“That was really sweet of you.” Craig, one of the youngest at the station, began to approach her and Josh knew he had to step in.
“Here, I was on my way out, too. I’ll walk you out.”
“Thank you. That would be nice.”
Josh guided her out of the room with a lightly placed hand on her back, staking his claim to the other guys. He glanced over his shoulder to see Craig stick his finger in the frosting, and the subsequent facial expression once he tasted the toothpaste mixed with fudge. Yummy.
“You didn’t get a piece of cake.”
He was hoping she had not noticed that.
“I’ll text them to save me a piece. I’ll be back later.” A lie. He didn’t want a piece of that cake. Not after knowing what she had used.
“Oh, good.” When they made it to the front entrance, she stopped and turned to him. Her eyes dropped to the floor for a moment before turning them up to look at him. “I’m not usually this forward...but would you like to get coffee or something sometime?”
“Yeah. I’m up for that.” They exchanged numbers quickly before she went her way and he went his. Man, he hoped this distraction worked. This was how he had handled it for the last decade. So why did he get the strong feeling it wouldn’t work this time?
* * *
Taylor sat across from him in the cozy restaurant; a question resonated in her big blue eyes. Was she asking him a question? Shoot. What did she just say? She sat there, waiting for a response from him.
She tried again. “What are some things you like to do?”
She was so sweet and innocent. She had no idea he wasn’t listening to her. He felt guilty. He should feel guilty.
