be in the middle of the chaos your sisters create.”
Jett hadn’t considered things all that chaotic, not like when the whole clan got together. Holidays were especially nuts, but in a terrific way.
Natalie handed him his hot dog, and he ate it in two bites. She lifted his cola for him to take a drink then returned it to the cup holder.
As if they’d been coordinating this sort of thing for years, they worked in complete harmony. On a gut level, Jett had known that it would be like this with her. Hopefully this trip would convince her of the same.
But if he came on too strong, if he got too insistent, she’d bolt. He knew it. It was another of those contrasts he’d mentioned: she had no inhibitions in bed, but outside of sex, he’d never seen a woman so skittish of commitment.
Somewhere in her past, someone had hurt her.
Now, with the distant relationships of her family, she had few people to count on.
For at least the near future, he’d be by her side, protecting her, sharing with her, just being with her.
And with that thought in mind, Jett prompted, “The scary part?”
While gathering her thoughts, she fed him a chip. “Around our house, everything was always solemn and circumspect. After my mother left us, we usually only saw our father when he needed to lecture us on something or when his social affairs required that he trot out the sterling offspring.”
Jett felt sick at such an upbringing, but even more than that, the way she’d said her mother “left” them—not that she’d passed away but that she’d left—caused him concern.
“There were very few meals with my father,” Natalie told him, “but when he was there, it was silent. We were at the table to eat, not to joke, not to bother him. We had to show perfect manners.”
Yet she’d eaten pizza at his table with a stray dog under her feet. “That sucks.”
She lifted her hot dog in a salute. “For Dad, the idea of eating fast food in a car while traveling would be obscene.”
“Fuck it.” Fuck him. “I’m having a good time.”
Natalie laughed as she fed him another chip. “Me too.”
She didn’t realize he was dead serious. Bad weather and road conditions aside, he was finally getting her to open up. He’d brave hell for that, so what did icy roads matter?
“When we did see Dad at home, it was in passing, as he was on his way out to another appointment. Sometimes he’d be gone for days, even a week or more. He didn’t keep us apprised of his itinerary, but when he wasn’t around we just assumed he was off on business.”
“He sounds like an unfeeling prick.”
She laughed again, but this time there wasn’t much humor in the sound. “That about covers it.” Her laugh faded to a secret little smile.
Enjoying the sight of that, Jett asked, “What?”
“I was thinking of my sister.” She shook her head with the memory. “Dad’s library was one of the rooms off-limits to us, so of course, that’s where Molly liked to go. I told her I didn’t care about his stupid library, but the truth was, I didn’t dare go in there.”
Lethal rage put a stranglehold on Jett. “What would he have done if he’d found you there?”
Natalie stroked his arm in comfort. “He didn’t abuse us physically, Jett. Not ever. Dad’s idea of punishment was a threat to separate us.”
And since they had only each other, that threat would be worse than anything else. “Separate you how?”
“Boarding school, summer camp, things like that. Looking back, I realize those were idle threats because Dad never spent money on things like that for us. He says that he wanted us to grow up independent of his wealth and social standing. He wanted us to make our own way.”
“So you attended public school?”
“Yes. We aced classes and we were always well dressed, because anything less would have reflected on him. But the extracurricular stuff that helps you bond with peers, like band or dance or drama…no way. I think that’s why Molly turned to books.”
“As an escape?”
“Yes. And it turned out well since she’s now a very popular writer.”
Jett could hear the pride whenever Natalie talked of her sister, but he knew that Natalie must have been equally influenced by the conditions of her life. “Why’d you become a teacher?”
The defroster ran on high, and still it could barely keep the ice off the windshield. More and more cars and trucks were showing up in ditches and over the median. Buddy now treated them to the resonance of a doggy snore. The weather outside the SUV served to blanket them in a unique form of intimacy. Jett could almost hear his own heartbeat, and hers.
For only a moment she looked out the side window, but then she turned her gaze back to Jett, searching for understanding, for things he desperately wanted to give her.
“I always remembered how it felt,” she whispered. “All though school, I was different when I shouldn’t have been. Unlike the kids who had real issues, my life was charmed.”
Would she always be so hard on herself? “Your issues were real.”
Natalie shook her head, and her hands fisted. “Not really, not like the kid who’s being physically abused at home, or the child with a physical or mental deformity. Even compared to the kids who were just unpopular because they weren’t as pretty or as well-to-do as some of the others, I was better off.” She stared at Jett. “Kids can be so damn cruel, when being a kid is hard enough.”
That bothered Jett because for him, life had been pretty fantastic. He couldn’t remember ever being singled out for any unfavorable reason. Usually just the opposite.
His classmates had liked him; he’d been one of the popular kids.
He’d done his fair share to combat bullies, and whenever possible he’d gone out of his way to befriend the kids who were ostracized. But then, he’d had parents who taught him sympathy and compassion in the same way that they’d encouraged him in everything from sports to education to…any damn thing he’d ever wanted to do.
“So like my sister, I’m glad for what my upbringing brought me. It’s taught me how to recognize the kids who are really troubled, and now I’m in a position to help. At least most of the time.”
“Most of the time?”
“There was one boy…he was so withdrawn, so antagonistic. I knew something was wrong, but I didn’t realize how bad it was. He wouldn’t confide in me, and I couldn’t reach his mother on the phone.” She squeezed her eyes shut. “He was homeless, Jett. His dad had passed away and his mother took off on her own, and he had…no one.”
Despite the treacherous conditions of the icy road, Jett reached for her hand. “You can’t know everything about everybody, honey. Kids are good at hiding things,
