The Trouble with Luv'. Pamela Yaye
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When all the guests were taken care of, the volunteers fixed themselves a plate and sat down wherever there was a vacant seat.
“Spend time getting to know the people at your table,” Xavier had encouraged, when he was giving last minute instructions. His eyes had circled the room and then lingered on Ebony’s face. “The only difference between the people eating here tonight and us is that they fell on hard times and didn’t have the necessary support system to survive. Inside, we are all the same. We all want to be loved, supported, cared for and cared about. Make the people who walk—” Xavier had swept a hand toward the hallway “—in here tonight feel special. Talk to them. Ask them questions. Listen earnestly to what they have to say. For a lot of them, it’s been months or even years since they had a quality meal and a meaningful conversation.”
Xavier’s words of encouragement played in Ebony’s mind now. He was asking the impossible. She couldn’t even look at her tablemates without shuddering, let alone engaging them in conversation. Mariana, the pencil-thin woman to her left, smelled like she had bathed in vodka. And every time she opened her mouth to put food in, some spilled out. Chester, who sat on her far right, was no better. He had a set of utensils, but pretended they weren’t there. He scooped up vegetables with his callused hands. Cut meat loaf with his fingers. Slurped his cream of mushroom soup. His shaggy facial hair was soiled with dirt and now remnants of his meal. When he guzzled down his drink, and then belched loud enough to shake the entire church, Ebony pushed away her plate. I’ll eat when I get home.
She caught Xavier watching her, and managed a weak smile.
“Are you going to eat the rest of your food?”
Ebony redirected her eyes to the beige-skinned man with the fatherly voice. “No, you go ahead.” When she handed him her plate, he grinned broadly, revealing badly stained teeth. “Old Man Griffin’s the name,” he told her. “Thanks.”
He tossed a handful of shrimp into his mouth. “Suppa’ sure is good, miss. Lady.”
Realizing he was referring to her, she said, “Glad you’re enjoying it.” Sister Bertha had seen to it that all the guests washed their hands and faces with soap, but to remove the grime out from Old Man Griffin’s fingertips called for something a little stronger than regular soap. It looked like the man needed some extra-strength bleach.
“We gonna get dessert?”
“I think I saw some chocolate swirl cheesecake around the back.”
“Chocolate swirl cheesecake! My old lady used to make that…was good…real good. Haven’t had dat in a long while.”
“Where is she?”
He shoveled macaroni into his mouth. “Don’t know for sure.”
“What happened?” Ebony asked in a quiet voice. She was about to withdraw her question, when the older man dropped his fork, propped his elbows up on the table and started to talk.
Ebony, and the other people at the table, listened quietly as Old Man Griffin shared from his past. He recounted how his life had taken a turn for the worse with clear detail and emotion. It was the winter of 2001, three months after September 11th. People were still scared. The economy was crumbling. Jobs were hard to come by. But the construction industry was flourishing. He loathed the cold weather, but he needed a steady paycheck. It was his third day on the job, the coldest day of the year, and he was battling the flu. A gust of bitter wind had rocked his scaffold, and in the blink of an eye, he slid off and landed hard on his back. Neck and facial injuries and a broken back had ended his construction career. He scratched his head. “Da foreman said I wasn’t en…entittl…”
“Entitled,” Ebony corrected.
“Thank you, miss. Lady. Da foreman said I wasn’t entitled to any cump…cumpens—”
“Compensation?”
He smiled his thanks. “Yes, dat’s it. He said I wasn’t entitled to any compensation because temporary workers aren’t covered for disability insurance or health benefits.” He fell silent for a few seconds. “Those damn welfare checks weren’t enough to feed my pregnant wife and two small kids. It was hell. I couldn’t get another job until my back healed and I couldn’t send my old lady out to find work, either. When we couldn’t pay da rent da second month, our stupid landlord kicked us out.”
Old Man Griffin twiddled with the napkin holder. Unshed tears pooled his black-brown eyes. He wiped his nose with the back of his hand, pushed the pain back to its rightful place and said, “We didn’t have anywhere to go. My wife’s cousin took pity on us and let us stay with her and her family for a month, and then we had to go.”
“And you don’t know where your family is now?” Ebony asked.
“My old lady took da children to her people down south…I think they’re in one of da Carolinas, I’m not sure. I haven’t seen or heard from dem in a year. Her family never thought I was good enough for her anyways.” He hung his head, but the anguish in his voice was unmistakable when he said, “I miss dem kids, especially the baby. She was just a few weeks old when my wife left. She’s three now and don’t even know her own daddy.”
“At least your ma didn’t toss you out on the street so her pimp could move in.”
Ebony swung her head to the right. Her gaze landed on the slight adolescent-looking girl with the chalk-white lips sitting next to Amelia. The girl reminded her of Halle Barry in New Jack City. The stringy blond hair. Cheap makeup. Too-short skirt and stretchy blouse. Ebony didn’t know what drug she was abusing, but it was obvious she was a slave to something.
“Back in the day, I was the most popular girl in school. All the brothers wanted to get with me. Jocks. Pretty boys. Geeks.” She snorted. “Today, those boys wouldn’t touch me with a ten-foot pole.”
Silence fell over the table. In the silence, Ebony searched for the right thing to say. “There are places you can go and get help. Agencies. Shelters. Community Centers. They’ll get you off the street, help you stay clean and give you a fresh start.”
“There’s no help for me. Ma used to say I’d never amount to anything. Told me I’d end up turning tricks like her. Said it was in my blood.” With a flick of her head, she said, “Guess she was right.”
Ebony extended a hand. “I’m Ebony. What’s your name?”
“Why do you care?” The woman’s eyes hardened, and her shoulders arched like she was gearing for a fight. She took in Ebony’s perfect hair, flawless complexion and polished nails. “You must feel pretty good about yourself, huh? Serving poor black folk. I bet you think you’re better than us. All dressed up in designer clothes and shit.”
It took a lot for Ebony to get embarrassed. But when a hush fell over the room and people at surrounding tables gawked at her, she felt her face flush. She didn’t dare look over at Xavier; she could feel the heat of his angry stare right