The Hotter You Burn. Gena Showalter

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The Hotter You Burn - Gena Showalter Original Heartbreakers

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room with a drawing tablet in his hand, “why didn’t she stay with us?”

      “Ruth works hard. She probably wanted to rest or write letters before she went to bed.”

      Nellie, his quiet Nellie, said, “She could have stayed and written her letters here.”

      “Tomorrow we’ll ask her to stay.”

      But would she? Levi had the sudden urge to follow her, to ask her to stay tonight. But he sat, the final snick of the Dawdi Haus door latch echoing above the children’s voices.

      * * *

      Ruthy leaned back against the kitchen door before heading down the short hall to the Dawdi Haus. The kitchen had been cozy and warm, and the lantern hung over the table had enclosed them all within its light. The scholars bent to their studies, Waneta copying recipes, Elias and Nathan sharing sections of The Budget—they were a family, but not her family. From the table-flat farmland outside the window, to the stark stiffness of the girls’ kapps, to the flat tones of their words, every moment she spent with Levi Zook’s family showed her just how far from home she really was.

      But this is where God wanted her to be, wasn’t it? And she was needed here. Even after this short time, she could see how much this family needed her help, especially the girls and little, lonely Sam. Several times during the day he would come to her and she would take quick breaks from her work to sit down and hold him on her lap while he chatted with her or showed her his drawings. His little-boy body had molded into hers, showing her how he missed the comfort of a mother’s arms.

      They all missed their mother, even Elias and Waneta.

      Ach, and she missed her own mother, even though they had only been parted a short time. But she could still write, and she knew she could visit whenever it was convenient. Her mam was only a train ride away.

      With that thought she hurried into the Dawdi Haus and relit the fire in the stove. She retrieved her writing desk from the bedroom and sat at the little kitchen table, as close to the fire as she could get.

      Putting the ink bottle on the side of the stove to warm it, Ruthy took out a sheet of paper and her pen, composing a letter to Mam in her head as she waited.

      Her first week had gone well, she would write. Waneta was a sweet girl and a joy to work with. Martha had loved learning to make pies. Nellie had come to her wanting to learn to purl so she could knit a pair of stockings for her dat, but Ruthy had convinced her to start out with a blanket for her doll to practice the stitches. Nancy had come home from school yesterday with snow inside her boots, complaining that David had pushed her into the ditch on the way home. The boys... She didn’t know any of them very well yet, except Sam.

      And then there was Levi. What would she tell Mam about Levi Zook?

      Ruthy picked up the bottle of ink and shook it as she considered this problem. The ink was almost warm enough to use.

      Levi hadn’t lied to her, but Mam and Dat would say he misled her by not telling her how many children he had. They would ask if she wanted to stay on, knowing he had kept that important information to himself.

      She smiled to herself. Of course she was going to stay. Ten children seemed like such a large number...until she started getting to know them. Now that she had met them, had seen how much they all longed for a mother in their lives, she couldn’t bear to think of leaving them.

      But... Ruthy shook the ink bottle again, and then brought it to the table and uncorked it. She filled her pen as she considered something that had been hovering at the back of her mind. What if there was something else Levi had forgotten to tell her?

      What if he already had a new mother chosen for his children and he had only hired her so the house would be orderly and running well before his new wife came to live here? She wouldn’t be surprised. Just because he hadn’t been successful in courting that other woman Waneta had told her about didn’t mean he didn’t have his eye on someone else. A man like him wouldn’t stay single very long.

      And if she got along well with the new wife, perhaps she would be asked to stay on. A new wife would need a helper, ja?

      The clock’s ticking echoed in the silent room. It was a pipe dream at best. When Levi married again, she would have to move on. Find another position as a housekeeper, or a mother’s helper...

      A tear fell, raising a spot on her paper. Ruthy quickly crumpled the sheet and threw it into the stove. She couldn’t send a letter home with a tearstain on it, could she?

      Home. Would she ever know the sweetness of her own home again?

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