intensity. ‘Ah, here’s Mum.’
Janine appeared, laying her hand on Amos’s shoulder. ‘I wondered where you’d vanished to,’ she said. ‘Time to go in.’
Before leaving Amos gave Freya a significant look, to remind her of the secret she’d promised to keep. She smiled and nodded. Reassured, he turned away.
When she was alone Jackson appeared from behind the tree where he had been lingering.
‘I had a feeling you were there,’ she said.
‘I’m glad I was,’ he said. ‘I can hardly believe what I’ve just heard. He actually admitted that he could have been wrong. Who’d have thought he’d ever admit to hearing that talk you had with your mother?’
‘Especially given what she said about him.’
‘Why? What did she say? I knew he’d eavesdropped that night, because I saw him. But I don’t know what he heard.’
‘Mum told me she had some doubts about him...whether they had a future together.’
Jackson whistled.
‘You mean she might be thinking of leaving him?’
‘That was the hint.’
‘But women don’t leave Dad. He leaves them. Heaven knows he’s left plenty of them over the years.’
‘But not any more,’ Freya observed. ‘Suddenly the positions are reversed and he’s the one who might be left. That’s why he’s seemed so different recently. It must have given him a nasty shock, but only in his pride. I doubt if his feelings were hurt.’
‘I don’t know. I’ve often wondered if he feels things more than he lets on, because he sees emotion as a weakness. Of course that’s why he swore you to silence. He’d die rather than have Janine know he heard her threatening to dump him.’
‘Pride again,’ she mused. ‘I almost feel sorry for him.’
‘And that’s something you must never let him suspect.’
‘I know. He’d regard pity as an insult. Poor Amos. And yet—Jackson, was I wise to promise not to tell Mum? Will I be able to keep that promise?’
‘Well, you know, one of the lessons Dad taught me was that wisdom sometimes lies in knowing when to break your word.’
‘Yes, I can imagine him saying that.’
‘There may come a day when she’s entitled to know. But not just yet. For now there’s something I want to say.’
He hesitated, as if unsure how to go on. She gave him a questioning look and he seemed to make up his mind. ‘Thank you for being so good to him tonight. The way you told him that everything was all right, that you’re not pining for Dan—that was very kind.’
‘I’m fond of Amos,’ she said. ‘Oh, I know I get mad at him sometimes, about his habit of insisting on his own way, but it’s nice that he wants me in the family—even if I can’t say yes.’
‘Was it true? What you told him? That you’re over Dan? That maybe you never really loved him?’
‘Of course it’s true. I’ve told you before, several times.’
‘Yes,’ he murmured, almost to himself. ‘You keep saying it.’
‘I’m not weeping and wailing because a man didn’t want me. I’ve got a life to live, and I’m living it very comfortably on my own. So if Amos ever asks you about me, you tell him that he did no harm and I’m perfectly happy.’
‘Fine, I’ll tell him he did no harm.’
‘And that I’m happy.’
‘Are you sure about that?’
‘Are you doubting me? I said happy and I meant happy—especially with all that money coming my way.’
‘And money equals happiness? You’re beginning to sound like him.’
‘Well, maybe he gets it right sometimes.’
‘Don’t!’ he said fiercely. ‘Don’t talk like that. It isn’t you.’
‘It could be the new me. I told you, I’m exploring new horizons and some of them are great fun. Goodnight, Jackson.’
‘Goodnight,’ he said as she walked away. ‘Goodnight—goodbye? I wonder which...’
* * *
They were close to finishing the project. Near the end of the next day Jackson was glad to slip away for a breather.
As if drawn by magnets he wandered to the statue of Horus and stood looking up at it, recalling the first time he’d seen it. A bird elevated in such a way might have looked ridiculous, but it didn’t. Rearing up to more than twice his own height, its sharp beak impressive against the sky, it suggested only power and danger.
He thought of Amos, a man with white hair and an elderly face, who carried the same aura. The grasping ferocity that had imbued his life and his career was always there, threatening in the background. In that he was undoubtedly Horus.
The light was fading. The others were almost ready to leave and soon he must join them. But first there was something he must do. Leaning back, so that he could confront the creature rearing above him, he spoke.
‘I had to come here,’ he said. ‘You seem to call me. You’re just like my father. He won’t leave a fellow alone either. Even after we all grew up he could never understand that we were independent. “Come here...” “Do that... ” “Marry the woman I’ve chosen for you...”’
Then marry her, whispered a voice in his head. You know you’re in love with her.
‘No way!’
Yes, you are. You’ve been trying not to admit it but maybe it’s time to face facts. She touched your heart when she clung to you in despair.
‘That was because I felt guilty.’
Was that the only reason? Maybe you just like being needed.
‘Even if you’re right—it’s too late now, isn’t it? She’s still snubbing me. She does it with smiles and charm, but a snub is a snub. I’m being kept firmly on the outside. It’s not just because of our quarrel. We’ve kind of made friends again. But more recently she’s backed off since the night I kissed her. I only meant to be kind and free her from Tommy—I did, honestly. I wasn’t thinking of anything more.’
Don’t kid yourself.
‘Well, maybe just a little. All right, more than a little. But she wouldn’t look at me after everything that’s happened.’
Don’t give up so easily. Perhaps your moment has come.
The words were so clear he could almost swear that a real voice had spoken.
