seemed to tower over Lisa. Awkward tension vibrated between them until he stepped toward the buffet.
Searching for some topic of conversation, Lisa asked, “Where will your daughter be going to school?”
Alan picked up an old-fashioned glass and tipped the lid from the ice bucket. “She has to make up her mind soon. I’ll find out when I get back to the ranch next week.”
“I imagine it’s hard to be away from your family when you travel for work.”
Although Lisa had told herself from the moment of Timothy’s birth that he was no longer hers, although she’d given him to Brian and Carrie so he’d have a secure future where hers had been uncertain, she’d still missed him terribly when she’d gone off to college. She’d thought once she’d started her own life she could put her past behind her and move on. That had included reconciling herself to the fact that although she’d given birth to a son, he was no longer hers and she was not a mother. But even her heavy load of course work hadn’t been able to make her forget about Timothy, though her resolve had always been strong and sure. She had done what was best for him. Thankful that Brian and Carrie were letting her stay involved in his life, she knew that the dull ache in her heart might never go away. But she’d always be a backup to Brian and Carrie. She just hoped as Timothy matured and learned the truth, he’d understand. Most of all, she hoped that he’d forgive her.
“I have been away a lot the past six months,” Alan replied. “Most of the time I’ve been working up here in Portland with Brian. I bought a condo in the fall to cut back on hotel bills.” He flashed the crooked grin that made Lisa’s toes curl in her boots.
He’s married, she scolded herself. No toe-curling allowed.
“Did I hear you say you got a new apartment?” he asked, glancing at her.
Alan had apparently been in and out of Brian’s life for the past six months, but she didn’t know what Brian might have told him. So she treaded carefully.
“Yes, I’m furnishing it, little by little. I dropped over tonight because Carrie had some extra things in the attic she thought I could use.”
“Brian and Carrie are a great couple. Truth be told, I never thought I’d want a partner, but Brian’s got great instincts and something else that’s hard to find these days—integrity.” He poured Scotch into his glass and then soda. “Can I fix you something?” he asked when he was done.
That surprised her, and he must have seen it in her expression.
“What? You think a man can’t fix a drink for a lady? Believe me, whenever Christina stays with me, I hear about the changing roles of men and women. I think she even did a paper on it.”
“Stays with you?” That sounded as if—
“Yes. I’ve had joint custody with my ex-wife since Christina was ten.”
“You’re…divorced?”
“Yes, I am.”
The toe-curling was back double-time now. “Maybe I will have a club soda,” she murmured.
“Ice?” he asked.
She nodded, then watched as his very large, tanned hands took the tongs and dropped three cubes into the glass. After he unscrewed the lid, he poured in the soda. He and Lisa reached for a lime slice at the same time. His fingers were hot, and when her skin touched his, she became hot, too. She knew a flush rose to her cheeks as she pulled back and let him add the fruit to her glass. When he handed it to her, she was careful that their fingers didn’t meet.
“Your lunch date looked like an interesting guy,” Alan remarked nonchalantly.
“Craig and I have known each other since…” She stopped. “For a long time.”
“You dated through college?”
“No. We kept in touch, but with him in Portland and me at college, we went our separate ways.”
“But now you’re back and he’s here, too.”
Was Alan fishing or just making conversation? She had the feeling he was going to cast out a few more lines, and she didn’t want to answer his questions. They were going to be working together, and she didn’t want him to be judging her while they were. And he would judge her if he found out about Timothy. She was sure of it. She did not want Brian’s friend looking at her as the homeless, unwed mother she’d once been. Maybe it was pride on her part, but she was trying to create a future.
“I’m going to see if Timothy finished his snack. Maybe I can read him a bedtime story before dinner. If you’ll excuse me…”
After a long, studying look, Alan tipped his glass to her. “Bedtime stories are almost as important as goodnight kisses. Enjoy.”
His words lingered as she went to the kitchen to find Timothy. Alan sounded as if he understood. He sounded as if he knew the importance of being a father.
One more reason to keep her past a secret.
During dinner, Alan’s gaze kept going back to Lisa again and again, in spite of his intentions to have a pleasant meal with Brian and Carrie and ignore the young woman who’d been in and out of his thoughts all afternoon. Damn it, she had a pretty face. Yes, she had glossy hair he’d love to run his hands through. Yes, she had a curvy figure that looked wonderful in low-slung jeans. And those boots—
He stabbed a bite of cake as if it might run away from him. He wanted a few questions answered. He and Brian weren’t close friends—not yet, anyway—but he’d been here for dinner before and there had never been any talk about Lisa Sanders. Yet here she was, acting as if she was a relative of some kind.
“So, Lisa, have you always lived in Portland?”
After a quick glance at Brian, she wiped her mouth with her napkin and seemed to consider an answer carefully. Finally she revealed, “I lived in Seattle with an aunt for a couple of years. But I was born in Portland and I always considered it my home.”
“She’s a friend of the family,” Carrie added casually. “We watch out for her.”
So they weren’t related. “You’re very good with Timothy,” Alan remarked. “I thought maybe Carrie had hired you to help out so you could earn extra money for college.”
The two women exchanged a look.
“I help out because we’re friends,” Lisa answered quietly.
There was an uncomfortable silence that Alan didn’t understand. Then Carrie focused her attention on Lisa. “Speaking of being friends, I have a favor to ask you.”
Lisa grinned. “Uh-oh. Let’s see. You want me to help with the spring charity auction.”
“Hmm, that would be great if you could, but that wasn’t what I had in mind right now. I’m in a pickle. My guest for Saturday canceled.”
Alan was aware that Carrie hosted a live Saturday morning talk show in the area. About Portland usually consisted of human interest stories or timely events.
“How
