a moment of weakness Anna wished they could go back to those early days.
‘What are you thinking?’ he asked, observing the change in her expression.
‘Nothing,’ she said flatly. ‘I was just remembering, that’s all.’
‘So you’ve not forgotten how it used to be?’
‘No. Of course I haven’t! Have you?’
‘No. I haven’t forgotten either,’ he told her, and could have gone on to remind her that during their last year at university all his hopes and dreams had been formed and she had demolished them with just a few words. But what was the point? It had all been long ago…
‘We’ve both missed out on many things since then,’ he said gravely, ‘and I still don’t know why.’
At that moment the moon appeared again and he saw her expression in its light. ‘What?’ he asked. ‘What’s wrong, Anna?’
‘Nothing,’ she said quickly. Desperate to lighten the moment, she pointed to an ancient stone building beside the river. ‘That’s an old water mill. It isn’t used now, of course, but it’s a favourite with local artists.’
‘I can imagine it would be,’ he said absently, still concerned about how she’d looked a moment ago. But it was clear that she wasn’t going to tell him what was wrong so he said easily, ‘I seem to have seen quite a few things tonight, but one thing you haven’t shown me is where you live. When do I get to see that? I’d like to be able to picture you there when I’ve gone.’
‘Another time maybe,” she promised. ‘I’ll show you round some time, but I think maybe we should call it a day now.’
She was feeling too emotional to take him into her smart little dwelling. Outside in the cold it wasn’t hard to keep at a distance but in a more confined space she couldn’t guarantee anything.
* * *
When she arrived home James was on the point of putting the ironing board away and on the kitchen table was a neat pile of newly ironed laundry.
‘You didn’t have to do that,’ she protested.
‘I know,’ he replied. ‘Just the same as you don’t have to look after me and mine, but you do.’ He observed her keenly. ‘I liked Glenn. It takes some guts to do what he’s been doing.’
‘Yes, it does,’ she agreed, and wondered what was coming next.
‘How would you feel if I offered him a temporary locum position in the practice until he’s decided what he wants to do permanently?’ he asked, choosing his words carefully. ‘I feel he could be just what we need if he agrees. I will have to consult Georgina, of course, though I can’t see her objecting to more help around the place. It’s what you think of the idea that I’m most concerned about. Would you want him living in the village, working in the practice, back in your life to some degree?’
Anna was gazing at him open-mouthed. ‘I know you’ve been thinking of employing a locum for some time,’ she croaked, ‘but Glenn! You hardly know him.’
‘That may be true,’ James pointed out equably, ‘but you know him so it will depend on what you say whether I offer him the position.’
She took a deep breath. Was this the moment to tell James just how close she and Glenn had once been? That he had once been the love of her life, but because she couldn’t give him children she had sent him away?
Or was it the time to burden herself with another secret, this time kept from James, and let him go on thinking she and Glenn were just casual friends? Otherwise he would be devastated to know just how much the operation had ruined her life and it might show through when he was in Glenn’s company. It didn’t seem as if there was much of a choice.
She took a deep breath. ‘You are putting me on the spot, asking me to give my opinion. Glenn and I were close once but we drifted apart, like students do, and as you know I haven’t seen him in a long time. But I can tell you one thing with regard to how good a doctor he will be. I have a very clear picture of that. I’m confident that you would find him extremely capable and caring. He would be an asset to the practice. Glenn sailed through every exam and was top of his year at university.
‘We would be fortunate to have him on board and I would say go for it if that is what you want. But don’t expect anything to change as far as I’m concerned. My life is mapped out and I don’t anticipate taking any side turnings. Just so you know, he’s offered to take the children and me to the Hollyhocks Tea Rooms tomorrow afternoon after I’ve shown him the lake. But before you get any crazy ideas, we’ve no plans to socialise after that.’
‘And if I offer him the job?’
‘It will be between the two of you. Just make sure he realises that I had nothing to do with it, and give some thought to where he is going to stay if he accepts.’
‘Well, the spare bedroom here has an en suite, as you know, so I can accommodate him temporarily if he accepts my offer. I don’t think having the kids around would bother him. It’s easy to see he’s good with children, and you are only next door.’
‘I can see that your mind is made up,’ she said, still bemused by this latest turn of events.
‘Only if you are in favour of the arrangement, and don’t forget he has yet to be asked.’
‘Yes, I know, and if he agrees it probably won’t be for long. He’ll soon be off on his travels again. So, yes, it’s all right by me, and now I’m going home or I’ll never be up on time in the morning.’
‘Promise me you won’t stay awake, worrying,’ he begged, ‘as nothing may come of it.’
‘I’ll do my best,’ she said, and went to have a peep at Polly and Jolly before going to the annexe next door. As she looked down at them, beautiful and innocent in sleep, Anna felt peace descend on her.
She might have just done the wrong thing, but wasn’t it better to keep up the charade of Glenn being just an acquaintance rather than never to see him again? That was what would have happened if she’d told James not to offer him the position.
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