we went to the store ’n I taked a nap—’’
‘‘You and Kristin,’’ Derek corrected her.
‘‘Yeah.’’ The little girl was completely unfazed. ‘‘An’ nen I played wif Play-Doh!’’
Kristin smiled grimly to herself as she stuffed her work in her briefcase and walked toward the front of the house. Had he thought she was exaggerating about Mollie’s new name for her?
Derek still stood in the foyer holding Mollie in his arms. His daughter had his face sandwiched between her two tiny hands as she looked intently into his eyes and Kristin’s heart contracted at the sight of the two dark heads so close together. Quietly, she picked up her jacket. ‘‘Hi. I just took the meat loaf out so you can have dinner right away.’’
Derek stared at her, his blue eyes dark and shuttered. ‘‘You’re not eating with us again?’’
‘‘No. I have a board meeting tonight.’’ Since she’d finished college, she’d sat on the animal sanctuary’s board of directors.
His eyebrows rose. ‘‘That doesn’t start until seven. You have plenty of time.’’
She couldn’t hold the eye contact as she started around him, expecting him to move out of her way. But he didn’t move, and his broad shoulder was too close to the door for her to pull it open. Taking a deep breath, she met his gaze with a defiant one of her own. ‘‘No, thank you. Excuse me.’’
‘‘Are you ever going to have supper with us again?’’ He moved aside, but acted as if he hadn’t even heard her and his tone was so aggressive she nearly took a step back before she caught herself.
‘‘I don’t know,’’ she said cautiously. This angry man wasn’t a Derek with whom she was familiar. He was normally one of the most unflappable people she knew. Of course, half the time he walked around in a fog, thinking about something to do with the animals he treated, she thought tenderly. Then she squelched her mental wanderings. Derek was still standing there waiting for an answer. ‘‘Probably. Mollie’s birthday is coming up in a few months. I’ll make something special for her that night.’’
‘‘September! That’s three months away.’’ Both she and Mollie jumped when he bellowed. Mollie immediately started to cry, and the anger in his face turned to helpless concern as he rubbed her little back. ‘‘I’m sorry, Munchkin. I didn’t mean to scare you.’’
‘‘D-daddy, don’t yell at Kristin,’’ Mollie said. She still had tears in her eyes but the little treble voice was firm.
Derek’s mouth dropped open. ‘‘She sounds just like you!’’ he said accusingly.
Kristin knew that wasn’t a compliment but she wasn’t prepared for the hurt that sliced through her. Deb had been sweet and quiet and charming. If she’d ever raised her voice or issued an ultimatum, Kristin couldn’t remember it and she sincerely doubted Deb had ever defied Derek in their entire life together. She, Kristin, couldn’t be more different from Derek’s beloved wife.
Leaning forward, she dropped a kiss on the little girl’s forehead. ‘‘See you tomorrow, honey,’’ she murmured. The action brought her far too close to Derek and she hastily pulled back and escaped before he could point out any more of her deficiencies.
* * *
Her phone rang just as she was getting out of the shower that evening. She wrapped a bath sheet around her and sprinted for her bedroom, where the closest handset was. ‘‘Hello?’’
‘‘We have to talk,’’ Derek said without preamble.
‘‘There isn’t anything to talk about.’’
‘‘You know that’s not true,’’ he said. ‘‘Kris, you can’t just cut yourself out of Mollie’s life so suddenly. She depends on you.’’
‘‘It’s not like I’m moving to California. I’ll be two miles away.’’
‘‘But she sees you almost every day.’’
‘‘All right.’’ She threw an exasperated hand into the air even though he couldn’t see her. ‘‘I’ll come by a couple days a week and have lunch with her after you get a new sitter.’’ She made an effort to soften her tone. ‘‘That way she won’t feel like I’m abandoning her.’’
‘‘I wish you wouldn’t do this.’’ His voice was soft and persuasive.
She wavered, nearly succumbing to the plea. But then she recalled the way he’d refused to take her seriously yesterday. ‘‘I have to,’’ she said equally softly. ‘‘I need to start living my own life, Derek. And so do you.’’
‘‘What does that mean?’’ There was a note of suspicion in his tone now.
She sighed. What could she say that would persuade him to stop trying to change her mind? ‘‘We spend far too much of our free time together.’’
‘‘So?’’
‘‘So we each need to learn to live alone.’’
‘‘Yesterday you wanted to marry me.’’
‘‘Yes,’’ she said steadily, ‘‘I did.’’ If he was trying to get her goat, he was succeeding. ‘‘But you made your position crystal-clear so I might as well accept it.’’
‘‘I think you’re punishing me for telling you no.’’
‘‘I am not!’’ she said indignantly. ‘‘I just think it’s time we all moved on. Deb’s been gone almost three years, and we’ve floated along in the same arrangement we had before she died. It can’t be good for any of us and if it isn’t going to be permanent, then we need to recognize that. I want a family of my own someday and no man is going to be interested in me as long as I’m so involved with you and Mollie.’’ Lordy, she hoped he didn’t take that statement at more than face value. She was already feeling humiliated enough without having him know that she had feelings for him.
There was a heavy silence on the line and she held her breath. Derek could barely stand to have his wife’s name mentioned; how was he going to react to that statement?
Then he sighed. ‘‘Maybe you’re right,’’ he said quietly. ‘‘It isn’t fair of me to monopolize you indefinitely. You’ve been so wonderful with Mollie that it was easy for me to forget you have your own life to live.’’
‘‘Thank you.’’ She had to work to keep her throat from closing up. This was a poor second-best option if she couldn’t have him. It was the hardest thing she’d ever had to do in her entire life. ‘‘I have to go. See you Monday.’’
‘‘Kris?’’ She loved the way he said her nickname. No one else had ever called her that.
‘‘Yes?’’
‘‘I don’t want to lose touch. Promise me you won’t dump us completely.’’
She laughed, perilously close to tears again. ‘‘I’d never do that. You and Mollie are
