lie sat like a rock in her belly, but she was too proud to admit that she did want more. She wanted everything, not just sex. She wanted to be with him the next day and the next. She wanted him to be a part of Chance’s life. But most of all she wanted his love, something she knew she would never have.
Chapter Six
He had sworn never to hurt Andrea again, yet that’s exactly what he had done by acting as though touching her had meant nothing. In reality it had meant everything.
On the return home the silence in the car had been stifling, and as soon as they pulled up in the drive, Andrea had gathered her belongings and exited the car without speaking. Only, she had not returned to the house. But Sam knew precisely where she had gone.
He could not let so much go unsaid between them. He would need to attempt once more to explain why he could promise her nothing. Perhaps he should tell her about his impending marriage to Maila so she would understand his resistance. Though the young woman meant nothing to him, he felt honor bound to his commitment. He doubted Andrea would understand, yet she needed to hear the truth.
As he set out on the path that led through the fields, the air was heavy with mist, almost stifling, and so were his thoughts as he silently rehearsed what he would say to Andrea. But when he came upon her seated on the blanket facing the pond, her elbows resting on bent knees and her beautiful face cast in the light of a half-moon, everything he had thought to say vanished.
Quietly he came up behind her and dropped to his knees, then circled his arms around her. “I knew I would find you here.”
When she shuddered, he wondered if he should let her go. Instead he held her tighter. “Are you cold?” he asked.
“No. I’m just having a strong sense of déjà vu.”
Sam moved around to face her and took her hands into his. He was uncertain where to begin but decided seven years ago would be an appropriate place to start. “I am sorry for leaving you without an explanation after Paul’s funeral. I feared that if you’d asked me to stay, I wouldn’t have been strong enough to deny you, and I knew that I must.”
She turned her face to the stars. “Let’s not go there tonight, Sam. You did what you thought you had to do.”
He drew in a sharp breath. “I do also wish to apologize for my behavior in the car. It was unfair to you.”
Inclining her head, she surveyed him a moment with soulful blue eyes. “You’ve told me all along that you don’t want me, so you have nothing to be sorry for.”
He released a frustrated sigh. “I do want you. I have never stopped wanting you.”
Her expression brightened somewhat, yet she still looked wounded. “You have a strange way of showing it.”
He attempted a smile. “I thought it was quite evident.”
Finally Andrea’s smile returned, a smile that had stayed with him over many days. Would stay with him always. “Okay, so maybe it was a little obvious.” Her features went solemn once again. “But that’s just a physical reaction, Sam. It doesn’t really mean anything.”
Framing her face in his palms, he said, “You have no idea how much you mean to me. How much you have always meant to me. But I cannot promise you anything.”
“I told you I don’t expect any promises.” She pulled his hand away and held it against her breast. “Life is so very short. No one can predict what will happen tomorrow. We both know that. I’m only asking for here and now. I just want to be with you. And when it’s over, then we’ll both move on with our lives knowing that we’ve found some joy in each other one more time.”
Sam considered what she was saying and then considered his marriage contract. Arrangement, he corrected. Only verbal to this point. His father had called because of that impending contract. Maila’s father was growing impatient with his absence, a greedy man willing to sell his daughter into a union for the sake of finances.
Maila was several years younger and a virtual stranger to Sam. The two times they had met, she had barely spoken to him and only then to give her vow that she would try to produce a son although he sensed that prospect wasn’t all that appealing to her. But Sam already had a son—a cherished child mothered by a woman for whom he cared deeply. A woman who now offered herself to him without condition. At the moment all he could consider was forgetting his obligations and turning his attention to that woman one last time.
“Are you certain you want this, Andrea?”
“Are you saying you’re willing to consider it?”
“As I told you before, I fear hurting you.”
“You’ll only hurt me if you keep acting as if there’s nothing going on between us, if you deny me this opportunity to be with you again in every way.”
“Are you not worried that I will disappoint you?”
Rising from the blanket, she began once more to undo her blouse and slipped it completely away. She then removed her shorts and panties, leaving her cloaked only by the night. “Do I look worried to you?”
“No. You look exquisite.” And she did, more captivating than he remembered. Priceless perfection. All his, if he so chose.
Heat surged through him and settled in his groin. A deep, abiding heat that made him hard and desperate to be inside her once more. That frantic need forced all consideration of the consequences from his brain. He only knew that he could no longer resist her.
Coming to his feet, he stood before her and tugged his shirt over his head. When he reached for the snap on his fly, Andrea stopped him with a gentle hand. “Let me do it. You didn’t give me the opportunity last time. In fact, I recall we didn’t completely remove our clothes.”
“True, but we were in a hurry.”
She slid his zipper down slowly. “Not tonight.”
When she had him completely undressed, they continued to stare at each other in the muted light until Sam could stand it no longer. He reached for her and she moved easily into his embrace. He held her a long while, relishing the soft feel of her bare skin against his raging body. Then he kissed her with all the yearning he felt in his soul, with all the need he had harbored since that final moment they were together seven years ago.
The kiss born of emotion soon turned to a kiss of sheer desire. Andrea pressed harder against him, meeting his tongue thrust for blessed thrust. Determined to show her more pleasure, he broke the kiss and settled his lips on her delicate throat then worked his way downward.
She sighed as he plied her breasts with tender kisses. She whimpered as he bent and traced a damp path down her belly with his tongue. She moaned as he fell to his knees and took her with his mouth.
With her hands gripped tightly in his hair, she swayed slightly as he explored the soft folds with his tongue, holding fast to her hips to steady her. But with every sound that escaped her lips, every tremor that ran through her body, he, too, began to feel unsteady. When she tensed and her breathing halted, Sam slipped a finger inside her to prolong her climax, to experience with his own hands the pleasure she now enjoyed.
As her knees began to buckle,
