way.
Gayle Turcotte, apparently recognizing how much the revelation had hurt Ashley, had been careful not to make any further mention of her son’s life in Seattle whenever their paths had crossed. She’d certainly never mentioned the baby girl that Cam’s wife had given birth to.
Madeline Carrington-Turcotte, according to the updated class list she’d inadvertently crumpled in her fist.
Cam had always been very traditional, so she would bet that the hyphenated name was his ex-wife’s idea. Just because Ashley had been foolish enough to doodle “Ashley Turcotte” inside the cover of her notebooks when she was in high school didn’t mean another woman would feel the same way about taking her husband’s name.
In any event, she and Cam had broken up more than twelve years earlier, so she knew it was ridiculous to feel so hurt by the knowledge that he’d had a child with another woman. But that knowledge failed to lessen her sense of betrayal.
Because when Cam had left her, one of the reasons he’d given for ending their relationship was that he didn’t want the life she’d envisioned for them—not yet.
“I’ve decided to go to Seattle,” he told her.
Ashley stared at him, feeling as if the very ground beneath her feet had begun to crumble. “Washington?”
He nodded. “Their School of Medicine is one of the best in the country.”
“But—” She didn’t quite know what to say, how to respond to something that he’d obviously already decided upon, and without even discussing it with her “—but you have at least three years before med school.”
“I know. But staying here, going to a university closer to home, it will only delay the inevitable.”
Inevitable? What was it that he thought was inevitable?
Ashley didn’t ask, because in her heart, she was afraid she already knew the answer. But she pushed aside her fears.
“There are good medical schools that aren’t on the other side of the country. Like Northwestern and Cornell. Even Chapel Hill would be better than Washington.”
“I want to go to Washington.”
She’d heard the finality in his voice, and her eyes had filled with tears. “You’re breaking up with me.”
He glanced away. “This is for the best, Ash.”
“Best for who?” she demanded.
“For both of us. Do you think this was an easy decision for me to make?”
“How would I know—since you never talked to me about it?”
“Because I knew you would try to convince me to stay. And because I was afraid I would let you.” He reached out and took her hands. “Because there’s a part of me that wants nothing more than to stay here with you.”
The seemingly heartfelt words and the warmth of his touch failed to thaw the icy numbness that had taken hold of her.
She managed to speak, though she didn’t manage to disguise the anguish in her tone when she asked, “Then why are you leaving?”
“Because we want different things, Ash. Being a doctor has been my dream for as long as I can remember.”
“You said you wanted to get married.”
“I do,” he agreed. “Someday. But I’m nowhere near being ready to make that kind of commitment yet. I’m not even close to thinking about being a husband or a father.”
As it turned out, that wasn’t exactly true.
Because only a few years later, before Ashley had even graduated from teacher’s college, he had married. He’d become someone else’s husband. And now she knew that he’d become a father, too.
He’d had the family she always wanted, and she was still alone.
Ashley wiped the tears from her cheeks, reminding herself that she wasn’t going to be alone forever. Despite her initial appointment at PARC having to be rescheduled, she was going to have a baby. And while she couldn’t deny a certain amount of disappointment that her child wouldn’t also have a father, she’d made her decision.
She wouldn’t regret that the baby she’d so often dreamed of having with Cam Turcotte would never be. And she absolutely wouldn’t let herself consider the possibility that his return to Pinehurst could change anything. Especially now that she knew he already was a father.
The ring of the bell jolted her out of her reverie. She hastily wiped the last of the moisture from her cheeks, pasted a smile on her face and opened the door to greet her new students.
She wasn’t sure how she made it through the day, but when the bell sounded at three o’clock, Ashley nearly wept with relief.
It took a few more minutes, of course, to ensure all the kids had their agendas and the assortment of documents that always went home on the first day. But the halls eventually emptied and quiet descended, and Ashley sank back into her chair.
“One day down, only one hundred and eighty-something to go.”
Ashley looked up, startled to see her sister in the doorway. Megan rarely ever came to the school to see Ashley, and the fact that she’d done so now indicated that she had something on her mind.
“One hundred and eighty-six,” Ashley told her. “But what dragged you out of the lab in the middle of the day?”
Megan practically floated into the room. She wasn’t usually the floating type, but she was obviously excited about something so Ashley tried to muster some enthusiasm for her.
“I had an appointment this side of town.” Megan came further into the room, some of the sparkle in her eyes fading as she looked more closely at her sister. “But let’s talk about what’s going on with you first.”
Ashley shook her head. She couldn’t talk about it. She didn’t know what to say, how to explain.
“Come on, Ash. You love the first day of school. I thought you’d be ready to go out and celebrate the beginning of a new year with a great big chocolate fudge brownie sundae at Walton’s.”
“Let’s just say that the day didn’t go exactly as planned.”
“I don’t understand.”
She sighed and pushed her class list across the desk. Megan picked up the page, frowning. Then her eyes widened.
“Madeline Carrington-Turcotte?”
Ashley nodded. “Cam’s daughter.”
“Oh, Ash.”
“She’s
