wasn’t. For the first time he realized there was a stigma attached to foster kids and abandoned kids. He never dated the girl again, nor did he want to. He was proud of his parents and he hated that the seed of doubt had been planted in his mind.
In college he fell in love for the first time. Rachel said she loved him, too. They started to make plans and they talked about children. He’d told her that he didn’t want to have children of his own. He tried to explain that he felt it was selfish of him to bring his own children into the world while there were so many others who needed a good home. She informed him quickly that she wasn’t raising someone else’s troubled kids.
He saw her in a different light then, but realized that he was asking a lot of her and broke it off. He was glad he found out her opinions before instead of after the marriage, though. A love he thought was forever died suddenly. That was an awakening in itself. The most powerful love he’d ever known was the love his parents had given to foster kids. It was selfless. Empowering. He saw it every day of his life as he was growing up.
So many abused and abandoned kids had come through their home. Under Ma’s and Pa’s love and care he watched battered kids grow strong, confident. All it took was one caring person to change a life.
He wanted to do that—to give back what he’d been given as a child. Ever the optimist, he had given love another try. Bethany worked at the courthouse and he saw her often. They talked about the future and she told him he was a wonderful man for wanting to help others, especially children. He relaxed, feeling secure in their love. Soon he asked her to marry him and he was happy in the knowledge that he’d found someone who understood him.
Her girlfriends had thrown them a big engagement party. There were a lot of people there whom Tuck didn’t know and he was eager for the evening to end. Toward midnight, he went in search of Bethany. She and a couple of her friends had disappeared about thirty minutes before.
He went upstairs to the bedrooms. A door was slightly ajar and he heard her voice. He thought they were talking girl talk and he didn’t want to intrude, but then he heard his name and something kept him rooted to the spot.
Even today he could remember the conversation almost word for word. Hannah, Bethany’s friend, said how brave Bethany was for agreeing to Tuck’s plans of taking in foster kids and not having any of their own.
“Oh, please,” Bethany had said. “Tuck doesn’t mean any of that stuff.”
“He seems pretty serious to me.”
“After we’re married, I can change his mind, and if I accidentally get pregnant, well, oops.”
Tuck pushed opened the door then and as they’d stared at each other, they’d known it was over. That pain cut deep and his trust in women took a tumble. He didn’t want a woman to change him or pay lip service to his wishes and plans. He wanted a woman to love him for who he was and he’d finally accepted that wasn’t going to happen. So he decided he could achieve his dream alone.
He took a swallow of beer, putting the past out of his mind. His thoughts strayed to the little boy. Tuck had called the hospital and they said he’d been treated, sedated and was resting comfortably. He’d go to the hospital first thing in the morning.
He heard a car drive up, but he didn’t move. It was probably Eli. Living so close together, they had keys to each other’s houses. Eli would check the house first then the back porch.
“Hey, Tuck. We thought we’d come for a visit.” The French door behind Tuck opened and Eli stepped out onto the porch with his six-month-old son, Jesse, in his arms. He had a diaper bag slung over one shoulder.
“Hi.” Tuck smiled at his nephew, a replica of Eli except for the blond hair, which was like his mother’s. Tuck held out his hands and Jesse wiggled to get to him. Eli plopped Jesse onto his lap.
Tuck raised him into the air and the baby gurgled loudly. “I see him almost every day and each time he seems to get bigger.” In that respect Jesse took after Eli, who was over six feet, well built and muscled.
“I know. It’s hard for Caroline to cart him around in the carrier.” Eli tousled his son’s hair. “So how was your day?”
Tuck told him about the little boy.
“Ah, man. That’s bad.”
“I’ll check on him again tomorrow. I hope they find him a good home.”
“They will.” Eli shook his head at the whole ugly mess. “I need a beer.” He turned back into the house. “Want one?”
“I got one,” Tuck replied, pointing to his beer on the table.
Jesse was fascinated with Tuck’s shirt pocket, sticking his fingers in and out, chewing on his fingers and then doing it again.
“You’re one lucky little boy,” Tuck told him. “You have parents who will never let you down.”
Jesse bumped up and down on Tuck’s knees and made cooing sounds. Unable to resist the baby, Sam reared up on Tuck’s thigh, wagging his tail. Jesse wriggled trying to get to the dog. Smiling, Tuck let him touch Sam and Jesse’s excitement grew.
Eli came back, a Bud Light in his hand. “Do they even know who the little boy is?”
“They’re investigating now.”
Jesse gurgled again, drawing their attention.
Eli sat on the edge of the other rocker, watching his son. “I’m thinking about calling him Jess. I know Jesse was on Pa’s birth certificate and Caroline liked it at the time, but now that he’s older I like Jess. It’s what everyone called Pa, anyway.”
Tuck rolled his eyes. “Could you be more transparent?” Eli and Caroline had decided to name their son after Eli and Tuck’s foster father.
“What?”
“Jesse sound too feminine for you?”
Eli took a swallow of beer. “Maybe.”
Tuck bounced the boy on his knee. “What does Caroline think of the idea?”
“She rolled her eyes just like you did.”
Tuck laughed, and it felt good to talk nonsense with his brother. “Pa said as he grew older everyone started calling him Jess. It will probably be the same with Jesse.”
“Yeah. And Caroline won’t think I’m a macho pig.”
“Caroline doesn’t ever think that about you.”
“Hmm. She understands me better than anyone.”
Tuck raised an eyebrow. “And believe me that’s not easy.”
“Come on, I’m a big old teddy bear these days.”
Tuck just grinned. Caroline had changed his brother for the better. He was softer, more approachable. He and Caroline were good for each other. Tuck envied that. He wasn’t jealous because he was happy for them. They’d found something rare—true love.
He wasn’t so jaded by past experiences that he didn’t believe in love anymore. He did.
