this and take a deep breath. You look awfully pale.”
“I’m okay.” Lindsey accepted the glass and drank, her hands shaking.
He gave her a moment to gather her thoughts. “Why are you here, Lindsey?”
She bit down on her lower lip, a small nervous laugh escaping her. “Don’t worry, Gavin. This is not a social call. I didn’t come back—”
“I didn’t mean it like that.” His heart squeezed at her cryptic tone. The Lindsey he knew never sounded cynical—not like him.
She inhaled a fortifying breath and he gestured toward the door. “Do you want to go somewhere and talk?”
Her brown eyes studied him pensively, and he remembered too late she’d asked him the same question the last time she’d seen him. He’d just testified against a murderer, only the man he’d testified against had threatened retribution to him and everyone Gavin knew. He’d immediately relived his childhood fears. Only this time he wasn’t the kid. He was the man whose loved ones had been threatened. He’d panicked and told her he didn’t want her. Didn’t want a relationship. Marriage. A family. Ever.
“Your office is fine. I came here…to ask for your help.” Her voice sounded stronger, but her fingers fumbled over the handles of her leather purse as if she were reconsidering the idea.
He stroked his beard with his chin, faintly aware her hand followed the movement. “What kind of help do you need? Money? Legal advice?”
“No.” Her eyes darted toward the closed door. “I need your services as a detective.”
“You came here to report a crime?”
“Sort of…yes.” Her back stiffened as if she didn’t know where to begin.
He’d seen the same nervous reaction when she’d confessed about her ex-husband’s illegal activities. “Take your time, and tell me what happened.”
She nodded, seemingly grateful for his encouragement. “I…I had a baby a few weeks ago.”
His heart thundered in his chest, his mind automatically ticking away the months.
The air caught in his lungs.
“But the doctor told me my baby died. I think he may have lied,” she continued in a shaky voice. “And I want you to help me find him. Or at least find out the truth. To find out if my baby is alive.”
The air caught in Gavin’s lungs. He leaned against the front of his desk and folded his arms. “Tell me something, Linds.”
She lifted her heart-shaped face to stare into his eyes. “What do you want to know?”
“Was the baby Faulkner’s, or…was he mine?”
Chapter Two
Lindsey bit down on her bottom lip, her stomach churning. All the way to the precinct she’d stewed over what to tell Gavin. Should she lie? Tell him the baby was her ex’s?
Gavin had claimed emotions muddied a man’s judgment. Would it be better if he didn’t know the truth?
“Lindsey?”
She was a terrible liar. And if he knew the baby was his, maybe he’d search even harder for him.
He leaned so close his breath brushed her cheek. “Is the baby Faulkner’s or mine?”
She looked into his eyes, the dark smoldering depths lurking with questions, and she heard the tension in his husky voice. He deserved to know the truth.
“The baby is yours.”
His dark gaze pierced her to the core. “You’re sure?”
She nodded slowly, her voice low. “He was six weeks early.” She glanced down at her hands and knotted them in front of her. “The last time I slept with Jim was the night before I signed the final divorce papers. He came by to try to make amends. I felt guilty over our failed marriage.” Lindsey shrugged, trying to remember all the reasons she’d given in to Jim that night. The next day he’d threatened her, had thought he’d won her loyalty back, but she’d seen through his manipulation and felt ashamed for letting him use her. She had to testify against him.
“When was that night?”
“Two months before…before that night with you. Besides, Jim always took extra precautions. He was adamant about that…. He…didn’t want children.”
Silence descended upon them with a chilling bleakness. Gavin dropped his gaze to the floor, then leaned back, half sitting, half propping himself on the front of his desk. His dark blue shirt stretched tight across his massive shoulders. “Why…Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I tried to. I called and left messages but you never returned my calls.” Anger, swift and hard, pressed against Lindsey’s vocal chords. “I didn’t expect anything from you, Gavin, not money, not support, certainly not marriage. I know we were both upset about Jim finding the safe house and we let things get out of control. Still, I thought you had a right to know. But you avoided me and when I came to the courthouse…”
“Jesus.” He reached for her, his expression pained, but she shrank away. “I had no idea that’s why you’d come.”
Lindsey stood and backed away from him, wrapping her arms around herself, her voice brittle, “No, don’t…don’t touch me, Gavin. Don’t make excuses.” She let the anger and pain from all those lonely months drive her. “The day I finally cornered you at the courthouse, you wouldn’t even talk to me. I’d even written you a letter, but you said you didn’t want to see me again, that you didn’t want marriage or babies. Ever. So I threw the note in the trash outside the courtroom that day.”
His gaze jerked back to hers, pinning her with the force of his emotions. Hurt, anger, remorse. He started to speak, but Lindsey cut him off.
“I didn’t come here to renew our relationship. I know the one night we shared meant nothing to you, and I didn’t intend to trap you into marriage or make you accept responsibility for a baby you didn’t want.”
A vein pulsed in his forehead, but he didn’t argue.
“I’m not asking anything from you now except to find out if my son is alive.”
“Our son,” he said in a deadly calm voice.
“Yes, our son.” She raised her chin a notch, forcing herself not to think about the pain he might be feeling. “All I want is for you to help me find my son and bring him home. Then we’ll be out of your life. Forever—just like you requested the day I tried to tell you I was pregnant.”
His shoulders went rigid and for a brief minute, fear knotted her stomach. She’d seen Gavin wrestle her ex-husband the night he’d attacked her. But Gavin had never been anything but gentle toward her. He rolled his shoulder as if it hurt, the overly long strands of his hair brushing his collar. He looked as if he hadn’t slept in days, too. She wondered what kind of case he’d been working on, then felt like kicking herself for caring.
As
