shifted her gaze from the branches to his laughing face, meaning to chide him for such foolishness, but her gaze became entangled with his, and her breath caught, the words dying.
Ben’s eyes, blue as a summer sky, seemed to darken as he studied her face. His gaze had lingered on her lips. And then his lips had found hers, and a totally unexpected joy exploded inside her.
She’d never known how long they’d stood there, exchanging kisses, laughing that it had taken them so long to recognize the feelings between them, talking about a wedding. When she’d finally slipped into the house and up to her room, she’d held the warm assurance of his love close against her.
And the next day he’d been gone, leaving only a note for his parents saying he was going to see something of the world.
Anna tried to shake off the memories. She seldom let herself relive them, because the aftermath had seemed so painful. No one knew about her and Ben, so she’d had to pretend that her pain was only for Ben’s family, not for herself.
After three years, it should have become easier. One night—that was all she had to block from her memories.
A final check around the center, and she was ready to go. She was just slipping on her coat when she heard a car pull up by the front door.
Anna frowned. One of their Englisch clients? No one was scheduled to come in today. She could only hope it wasn’t an emergency.
Footsteps sounded on the porch, and she hurried to the door. She flung it open almost as soon as the knock sounded and stumbled back a step, the familiar room spinning around her.
The man standing on the porch wore boots, jeans and a black leather jacket zipped up against the cold, but he wasn’t an Englischer. He was Benjamin Miller.
* * *
Of all the ways Ben had thought about his homecoming, the one he hadn’t pictured was coming face to face with Anna Zook. She’d changed—that was his first automatic thought. He’d left behind a tender girl whose face had glowed with the impact of first love. Now he faced a woman who wore her maturity like a cloak around her.
“Anna.” He said her name heavily, embarrassment and sorrow mixing in his tone. He didn’t doubt he’d hurt her when he’d left. She had plenty of reasons not to welcome his return. “It’s been a long time.”
The words seemed to jolt her out of a daze. “Three years,” she said tartly. “None of us have forgotten.”
She seemed already armed against his return. Maybe that would make things easier. Whatever else happened here in Lost Creek, he couldn’t hurt Anna again.
“I guess not.” He gestured toward the door. “Mind if I come in?”
For an instant he thought she would slam it in his face. Then she nodded and stepped back, standing silent as he entered.
He looked around with appreciation. “The birthing center wasn’t finished yet when I left. It looks good.”
“Your father and brothers did fine work on building it just as your mamm wanted.”
Was that a reminder that he hadn’t been here to help? Probably so. He turned slowly to face her, letting his gaze drift over her. The honey-brown hair seemed to have lost its glints of gold, but maybe that was because it was December, not August. He’d always picture her under the apple tree on a summer night, her heart-shaped face tilted toward his, her green eyes lit with love.
“You’ve changed.” It was inadequate, but it was the only thing he could think to say.
“People do in three years.” She glanced at his leather jacket and jeans. “You have.”
She couldn’t know how much. If Anna’s face showed her added maturity and assurance, his must be a map of disappointment and betrayal.
Time to leave behind this fruitless conversation and move on to the family. “Is Mamm at the house?”
Anna nodded, warily it seemed. “She went over a few minutes ago. We’ve finished with the patients for today, unless there’s an emergency.”
“I guess I’d best go and face the music, ain’t so?” The familiar Pennsylvania Dutch phrase fell easily from his lips after training himself not to use it. He half turned toward the door and found that his feet didn’t want to move. Coward, he told himself.
Still, his gaze sought Anna’s face again. “My family—is everyone well?”
“So far as I know.” She bit her lower lip, as if she’d like to say something else but restrained herself.
“If you’re ready to go, I’ll walk over with you.”
She hesitated, and Ben recognized her reluctance. He opened the door, waiting, and Anna walked out with him.
The farm he’d grown up on spread out before him, the grass turning brown with winter’s cold, the fruit trees bare. Resting, Daad would have said. Everything rested in winter, building up strength for the spring.
Funny. He’d never expected to cherish the most common of sights—the spring wagon parked beside the red barn, the windmill spinning in the strong breeze, the chickens pecking at the earth inside their pen, hunting for a forgotten bit of grain.
He’d left because he’d thought he didn’t belong here. He’d learned the hard way he didn’t belong in the outside world, either.
Could he come home again? They’d reached the back door that led into the kitchen. He was about to find out.
Anna hesitated on the step. “Maybe I should wait. Give you time with the family...”
“Mamm always said you were part of the family. There’s no reason I can see to back off now.” He may as well face all the people he’d disappointed at the same time. He seized the doorknob, turned it and stepped inside.
Daad and Joshua were sitting at the table. Mamm stood at the stove. All three of them turned to stare, seeming immobilized with shock. He waited, all the words he’d rehearsed deserting him.
Daad recovered first. He set down his coffee mug with a thud, his keen blue eyes fastened on Ben’s face. Daad looked much the same—lean and wiry, his skin weathered from working outside. His beard was a little longer, a little grayer, that was all.
“So,” he said. “You’ve come back.”
It wasn’t exactly the welcome given to the prodigal son, but he guessed it would have to do. “Ya,” he said. “If you’ll have me.”
Daad’s face was impassive. “It’s your home.”
As if he’d been waiting for Daad’s reaction, Joshua scrambled to his feet, grinning. “It’s gut to see you, Ben.”
“Can this be my little bruder?” Ben grabbed his shoulder. “You’re near as big as I am.”
“What do you mean, near as big? I am as tall, ain’t so?” Joshua, the youngest, had always been eager to catch up with his brothers.
“Maybe
