you as a Sullivanthauros, should you claim to be a member of that extinct race.”
Then two little weasels—a boy weasel and a girl weasel—came into the bower and threw their school-books at the squirrel so cleverly that one hit the King upon the nose and smashed his cigar and the other caught him fairly in the pit of his stomach.
At first the monarch howled a bit; then he wiped the tears from his face and said:
“Ah, what delightful children I have! What do you wish, my darlings?”
“I want a cent for chewing gum,” said the Girl Weasel.
“Get it from the Guinea-Pig; you have my assent. And what does my dear boy want?”
“Pop,” went the Weasel, “our billy-goat has swallowed the hare you gave me to play with.”
“Dear me,” sighed the King, “how often I find a hair in the butter! Whenever I reign people carry umbrellas; and my son, although quite polished, indulges only in monkey-shines! Uneasy lies the head that wears a crown! but if one is scalped, the loss of the crown renders the head still more uneasy.”
“Couldn’t they find a better king than you?” enquired the WoggleBug, curiously, as the children left the bower.
“Yes; but no worse,” answered the Weasel; “and here in the jungle honors are conferred only upon the unworthy. For if a truly great animal is honored he gets a swelled head, and that renders him unbearable. They now regard the King of the Jungle with contempt, and that makes all my subjects self-respecting.”
“There is wisdom in that,” declared the WoggleBug, approvingly; “a single glance at you makes me content with being so excellent a bug.”
“True,” murmured the King, yawning. “But you tire me, good stranger. Miss Chim, will you kindly get the gasoline can? It’s high time to eradicate this insect.”
“With pleasure,” said Miss Chim, moving away with a smile.
But the WoggleBug did not linger to be eradicated. With one wild bound he cleared the door of the palace and sprinted up the entrance of the Jungle. The bear soldiers saw him running away, and took careful aim and fired. But the gold-plated muskets would not shoot straight, and now the WoggleBug was far distant, and still running with all his might.
Nor did he pause until he had emerged from the forest and crossed the plains, and reached at last the city from whence he had escaped in the balloon. And, once again in his old lodgings, he looked at himself in the mirror and said:
“After all, this necktie is my love—and my love is now mine forevermore! Why should I not be happy and content?”
Ozma of Oz
1. The Girl in the Chicken Coop
5. Dorothy Opens the Dinner Pail
15. Billina Frightens the Nome King
17. The Scarecrow Wins the Fight
18. The Fate of the Tin Woodman
A Record of Her Adventures with Dorothy Gale of
Kansas, the Yellow Hen, the Scarecrow, the Tin
Woodman, Tiktok, the Cowardly Lion and
the Hungry Tiger; Besides Other Good
People too Numerous to Mention
Faithfully Recorded Herein
Author’s Note
My friends the children are responsible for this new “Oz Book,” as they were for the last one, which was called The Land of Oz. Their sweet little letters plead to know “more about Dorothy”; and they ask: “What became of the Cowardly Lion?” and “What did Ozma do afterward?”—meaning, of course, after she became the Ruler of Oz. And some of them suggest plots to me, saying: “Please have Dorothy go to the Land of Oz again”; or, “Why don’t you make Ozma and Dorothy meet, and have a good time together?” Indeed, could I do all that my little friends
