Doubts and longings did not beset her. She was content within her sphere: a destined queen of the home. And yet she could not be accused of being old-fashioned. None would dare to despise her. She was what Hilda could never be, had never long desired to be. She was what Hilda had definitely renounced being. And there stood Hilda, immature, graceless, harsh, inelegant, dowdy, holding the letter between her inky fingers, in the midst of all that hard masculine mess,—and a part of it, the blindly devoted subaltern, who could expect none of the ritual of homage given to women, who must sit and work and stand and strain and say ‘yes,’ and pretend stiffly that she was a sound, serviceable, thick-skinned imitation man among men! If Hilda had been a valkyrie or a saint she might have felt no envy and no pang. But she was a woman. Self-pity shot through her tremendous pride; and the lancinating stab made her inattentive even to her curiosity concerning the purpose of Janet’s visit.
III
“I came to see Mr. Cannon,” said Janet. “The housekeeper downstairs told me he was here somewhere.”
“He’s engaged,” answered Hilda in a low voice, with the devotee’s instinct to surround her superior with mystery.
“Oh!” murmured Janet, checked.
Hilda wondered furiously what she could be wanting with Mr. Cannon.
Janet recommenced: “It’s really about Miss Gailey, you know.”
“Yes—what?”
Hilda nodded eagerly, speaking in a tone still lower and more careful.
Janet dropped her voice accordingly: “She’s Mr. Cannon’s sister, of course?”
“Half-sister.”
“I mean. I’ve just come away from seeing her.” She hesitated. “I only heard by accident. So I came over with father. He had to come to a meeting of the Guardians here, or something. They’ve quarrelled, haven’t they?”
“Who? Miss Gailey and Mr. Cannon? Well, you see, she quarrels with every one.” Hilda appeared to defend Mr. Cannon.
“I’m afraid she does, poor thing!”
“She quarrelled with mother.”
“Really! when was that?”
“Oh! Years and years ago! I don’t know when. I was always surprised mother let me go to the class.”
“It was very nice of your mother,” said Janet, appreciative.
“Is she in trouble?” Hilda asked bluntly.
“I’m afraid she is.”
“What?”
Janet suddenly gave a gesture of intimacy. “I believe she’s starving!”
“Starving!” Hilda repeated in a blank whisper.
“Yes, I do! I do really believe she hasn’t got enough to eat. She’s quarrelled with just about everybody there was to quarrel with. She suffers fearfully with rheumatism. She never goes out—or scarcely ever. You know her dancing-classes have all fallen away to nothing. I fancy she tried taking lodgers—”
“Yes, she did. I understood she was very good at housekeeping.”
“She hasn’t got any lodgers now. There she is, all alone in that house, and—”
“But she can’t be starving!” Hilda protested. At intervals she glanced at the inner door, alarmed.
“I really think she is,” Janet persisted, softly persuasive.
“But what’s to be done?”
“That’s the point. I’ve just seen her. I went on purpose, because I’d heard.... But I had to pretend all sorts of things to make an excuse for myself. I couldn’t offer her anything, could I? Isn’t it dreadful?”
They were much worried, these two young maids, full of health and vigour and faith, and pride and simplicity, by this startling first glimpse into one of the nether realities of existence. And they loyally tried to feel more worried than they actually were; they did their best, out of sympathy, to moderate the leaping, joyous vitality that was in them,— and did not succeed very well. They were fine, they were touching—but they were also rather deliciously amusing—as they concentrated all their resources of solemnity and of worldly experience on the tragic case of the woman whom life had defeated. Hilda’s memory rushed strangely to Victor Hugo. She was experiencing the same utter desolation—but somehow less noble—as had gripped her when she first realized the eternal picture, in Oceana Nox, of the pale-fronted widows who, tired of waiting for those whose barque had never returned out of the tempest, talked quietly among themselves of the lost—stirring the cinders in the fireplace and in their hearts.... Yet Sarah Gailey was not even a widow. She was an ageing dancing-mistress. She had once taught the grace of rhythmic movement to young limbs; and now she was rheumatic.
“Nobody but Mr. Cannon can do anything,” Janet murmured.
“I’m sure he hasn’t the slightest idea—not the slightest!” said Hilda half defensively. But she was saying to herself: “This man made me write a lie, and now I hear that his sister is starving—in the same town!” And she thought of his glossy opulence. “I’m quite sure of that!” she repeated to Janet.
“Oh! So am I!” Janet eagerly concurred. “That’s why I came.... Somebody had to give him a hint.... I never dreamt of finding you, dear!”
“It is strange, isn’t it?” said Hilda, the wondrous romance of things seizing her. Seen afresh, through the eyes of this charming, sympathetic acquaintance, was not Mr. Cannon’s originality in engaging her positively astounding?
“I suppose you couldn’t give him a hint?”
“Yes, I’ll tell him,” said Hilda. “Of course!” In spite of herself she was assuming a certain proprietorship in Mr. Cannon.
“I’m so glad!” Janet replied. “It is good of you!”
“It seems to me it’s you that’s good, Janet,” Hilda said grimly. She thought: “Should I, out of simple kindliness and charity, have deliberately come to tell a man I didn’t know... that his sister was starving? Never!”
“He’s bound to see after it!” said Janet, content.
“Why, of course!” said Hilda, clinching the affair, in an intimate, confidential murmur.
“You’ll tell him to-night?”
Hilda nodded.
They exchanged a grave glance of mutual appreciation and understanding. Each was sure of the other’s high esteem. Each was glad that chance had brought about the meeting between them. Then they lifted away their apprehensive solicitude for Sarah Gailey, and Janet, having sighed relief, began to talk about old times. And their voices grew louder and more free.
“Can you tell me what time it is?” Janet asked, later. “I’ve
