I don’t want to go to mad people,” Alice answered.
“Oh,” said the Cat: “but we’re all mad here. I’m mad. You’re mad.”
“How do you know I’m mad?” inquired Alice.
“You must be,” said the Cat, “or you wouldn’t be here.[103] Do you play croquet with the Queen to-day?”
“I would like it very much,” said Alice, “but I haven’t been invited yet.[104]”
“You’ll see me there,” said the Cat, and vanished.
Suddenly it appeared again.
“By-the-way, what became of the baby?” wondered the Cat. “I forgot to ask.”
“It turned into a pig,” Alice quietly said.
“I thought so,” said the Cat, and vanished again.
Alice waited a little but it did not appear, so she walked in the direction of the March Hare’s house. “I’ve seen hatters before,” she said to herself; “the March Hare will be much more interesting, and perhaps as this is May it won’t be absolutely mad – at least not as mad as it was in March.” As she said this, she looked up, and there was the Cat again, sitting on a tree.
“Did you say pig, or fig?” asked the Cat.
“I said pig,” replied Alice; “and could you please stop appearing and vanishing so suddenly?”
“All right,” answered the Cat; and this time it vanished slowly, beginning with the end of the tail, and ending with the grin, which remained in the tree for some time.
“Well! I’ve often seen a cat without a grin,” thought Alice; “but a grin without a cat! It’s the most curious thing I ever saw in my life!”
And she walked to the March Hare’s house. She saw it quite soon: the chimneys looked like ears and the roof was covered with fur.
Chapter 7. A Mad Tea-Party
There was a table under a tree in front of the house, and the March Hare and the Hatter were having tea at it: a Dormouse[105] was sitting between them, fast asleep.[106]
The table was large, but the three[107] were all together at one corner of it: “No room![108] No room!” they cried out when they saw Alice. “There’s a LOT of room!” said Alice indignantly, and she sat down in a large arm-chair at one end of the table.
“Have some wine,” the March Hare said in an encouraging tone.
Alice looked all round the table, but there was nothing on it except tea. “I don’t see any wine,” she remarked.
“There isn’t any,” said the March Hare.
“Then it wasn’t very polite of you[109] to offer it,” said Alice angrily.
“It wasn’t very polite of you to sit down without invitation,” said the March Hare.
“I didn’t know it was YOUR table,” said Alice; “it’s laid[110] for much more than three.”
The party sat silent for a minute. The Hatter spoke first. “What day of the month is it?” he said, turning to Alice: he had taken his watch out of his pocket, and was looking at it, shaking it, and holding it to his ear.
Alice thought a little, and then said “The fourth.”
“Two days wrong![111]” noted the Hatter. “I told you butter couldn’t help!” he added looking angrily at the March Hare.
“It was the BEST butter,” the March Hare replied. He took the watch and looked at it unhappily: then he put it into his cup of tea, and looked at it again: but he could only repeat, “It was the BEST butter.”
“What a funny watch!” Alice remarked. “It tells the day of the month, and doesn’t tell the time!”
“Why should it?[112]“inquired the Hatter. “Does YOUR watch tell you what year it is?”
“Of course not,” Alice replied readily: “but that’s because it stays the same year for a long time.”
“So does MINE,[113]” said the Hatter.
“I don’t quite understand you,” Alice said, as politely as she could.
“Well, you know, we quarreled with Time last March – just before HE went mad – ” (pointing at the March Hare,) “ – it was at the great concert given by the Queen of Hearts where I had to sing.[114] I hadn’t finished the first part of the song when the Queen shouted: “He’s murdering the time! Off with his head![115]”
“Oh, how cruel!” exclaimed Alice.
“And since that,” the Hatter went on sadly, “it’s always six o’clock now.”
A bright idea came into Alice’s head. “Is that why so many tea-things are here?” she asked.
“Yes, that’s it,” said the Hatter with a sigh: “it’s always tea-time, and we’ve no time to wash the things.”
“Then you move round all the time, I suppose?” said Alice.
“Exactly so,” said the Hatter.
“But what happens when you come to the beginning again?” Alice decided to ask.
“Let’s change the subject,” the March Hare yawned. “I think the lady will tell us a story.”
“I’m afraid I don’t know any,” said Alice.
“Then take some more tea,” the March Hare told Alice very seriously.
“I’ve had no tea yet,[116]” Alice replied in an offended tone, “so I can’t take more.”
“You mean you can’t take LESS,” said the Hatter: “it’s very easy to take MORE than nothing.”
Alice helped herself to some tea and bread-and-butter.[117]
“I want a clean cup,” suddenly said the Hatter: “let’s all move one place on.
or you wouldn’t be here – или тебя бы здесь не было
I haven’t been invited yet – Меня еще не пригласили
Dormouse – соня (Сони – мелкие и средние по размерам грызуны, внешне похожие на мышей или на белок; эти ночные животные держат пальму первенства по продолжительности сна)
fast asleep – крепко спала
the three – эти трое
No room! – Нет места!
Then it wasn’t very polite of you… – Тогда с вашей стороны было невежливо…
it’s laid – он (стол) накрыт
Two days wrong! – Ошиблась на два дня!
Why should it? – А с чего это оно должно?
So does MINE – Мои (часы) тоже
where I had to sing – где мне пришлось петь
Off with his head! – Отрубить ему голову!
I’ve had no tea yet – Я еще не пила чай
Alice helped herself to some tea and bread-and-butter – Алиса налила себе чаю и взяла бутерброд с маслом
