Perelandra. C. S. Lewis
Чтение книги онлайн.
Читать онлайн книгу Perelandra - C. S. Lewis страница 14
![Perelandra - C. S. Lewis Perelandra - C. S. Lewis](/cover_pre337522.jpg)
‘I was young yesterday,’ she began, but he did not hear the rest of her speech. The meeting, now that it had actually come about, proved overwhelming. You must not misunderstand the story at this point. What overwhelmed him was not in the least the fact that she, like himself, was totally naked. Embarrassment and desire were both a thousand miles away from his experience: and if he was a little ashamed of his own body, that was a shame which had nothing to do with difference of sex and turned only on the fact that he knew his body to be a little ugly and a little ridiculous. Still less was her colour a source of horror to him. In her own world that green was beautiful and fitting; it was his pasty white and angry sunburn which were the monstrosity. It was neither of these; but he found himself unnerved. He had to ask her presently to repeat what she had been saying.
‘I was young yesterday,’ she said. ‘When I laughed at you. Now I know that the people in your world do not like to be laughed at.’
‘You say you were young?’
‘Yes.’
‘Are you not young today also?’
She appeared to be thinking for a few moments, so intently that the flowers dropped, unregarded, from her hand.
‘I see it now,’ she said presently. ‘It is very strange to say one is young at the moment one is speaking. But tomorrow I shall be older. And then I shall say I was young today. You are quite right. This is great wisdom you are bringing, O Piebald Man.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘This looking backward and forward along the line and seeing how a day has one appearance as it comes to you, and another when you are in it, and a third when it has gone past. Like the waves.’
‘But you are very little older than yesterday.’
‘How do you know that?’
‘I mean,’ said Ransom, ‘a night is not a very long time.’
She thought again, and then spoke suddenly, her face lightening. ‘I see it now,’ she said. ‘You think times have lengths. A night is always a night whatever you do in it, as from this tree to that is always so many paces whether you take them quickly or slowly. I suppose that is true in a way. But the waves do not always come at equal distances. I see that you come from a wise world … if this is wise. I have never done it before – stepping out of life into the Alongside and looking at oneself living as if one were not alive. Do they all do that in your world, Piebald?’
‘What do you know about other worlds?’ said Ransom.
‘I know this. Beyond the roof it is all deep heaven, the high place. And the low is not really spread out as it seems to be’ (here she indicated the whole landscape) ‘but is rolled up into little balls: little lumps of the low swimming in the high. And the oldest and greatest of them have on them that which we have never seen nor heard and cannot at all understand. But on the younger Maleldil has made to grow the things like us, that breathe and breed.’
‘How have you found all this out? Your roof is so dense that your people cannot see through into Deep Heaven and look at the other worlds.’
Up till now her face had been grave. At this point she clapped her hands and a smile such as Ransom had never seen changed her. One does not see that smile here except in children, but there was nothing of the child about it there.
‘Oh, I see it,’ she said. ‘I am older now. Your world has no roof. You look right out into the high place and see the great dance with your own eyes. You live always in that terror and that delight, and what we must only believe you can behold. Is not this a wonderful invention of Maleldil’s? When I was young I could imagine no beauty but this of our own world. But He can think of all, and all different.’
‘That is one of the things that is bewildering me,’ said Ransom. ‘That you are not different. You are shaped like the women of my own kind. I had not expected that. I have been in one other world beside my own. But the creatures there are not at all like you and me.’
‘What is bewildering about it?’
‘I do not see why different worlds should bring forth like creatures. Do different trees bring forth like fruit?’
‘But that other world was older than yours,’ she said.
‘How do you know that?’ asked Ransom in amazement.
‘Maleldil is telling me,’ answered the woman. And as she spoke the landscape had become different, though with a difference none of the senses would identify. The light was dim, the air gentle, and all Ransom’s body was bathed in bliss, but the garden world where he stood seemed to be packed quite full, and as if an unendurable pressure had been laid upon his shoulders, his legs failed him and he half sank, half fell, into a sitting position.
‘It all comes into my mind now,’ she continued. ‘I see the big furry creatures, and the white giants – what is it you called them? – the sorns, and the blue rivers. Oh, what a strong pleasure it would be to see them with my outward eyes, to touch them, and the stronger because there are no more of that kind to come. It is only in the ancient worlds they linger yet.’
‘Why?’ said Ransom in a whisper, looking up at her.
‘You must know that better than I,’ she said. ‘For was it not in your own world that all this happened?’
‘All what?’
‘I thought it would be you who would tell me of it,’ said the woman, now in her turn bewildered.
‘What are you talking about?’ said Ransom.
‘I mean,’ said she, ‘that in your world Maleldil first took Himself this form, the form of your race and mine.’
‘You know that?’ said Ransom sharply. Those who have had a dream which is very beautiful but from which, nevertheless, they have ardently desired to awake, will understand his sensations.
‘Yes, I know that. Maleldil has made me older to that amount since we began speaking.’ The expression on her face was such as he had never seen, and could not steadily look at. The whole of this adventure seemed to be slipping out of his hands. There was a long silence. He stooped down to the water and drank before he spoke again.
‘Oh, my Lady,’ he said, ‘why do you say that such creatures linger only in the ancient worlds?’
‘Are you so young?’ she answered. ‘How could they come again? Since our Beloved became a man, how should Reason in any world take on another form? Do you not understand? That is all over. Among times there is a time that turns a corner and everything this side of it is new. Times do not go backward.’
‘And can one little world like mine be the corner?’