if he suddenly remembered that they weren’t normal would-be grandparents discussing their imminent grandchild. Anneliese thought the same thing.
She’d allowed herself to think about how she and Edward would react to the news that Beth was having a baby and this scenario had never figured in her imaginings.
‘It is wonderful,’ Edward went on, ‘that something nice is coming out of all of this.’
‘You talk like there has just been a natural disaster and none of us are responsible for it,’ Anneliese snapped. ‘There’s nothing natural about it at all. You cheated on me, left me for Nell. Nell! For God’s sake, how could you do that, Edward? Nell was our friend. I used to feel guilty inviting her over all the time, in case you were fed up of there being a third wheel at dinner. How stupid of me: you loved having her here. I was probably the one you wanted to get rid of.’
‘No, it wasn’t like that,’ Edward said.
‘Well, what was it like? You know, now that you’re here, you can answer some questions.’
She sat on the edge of one of the chairs opposite him and glared at him.
‘When did you start screwing my friend? Please tell me – not that I expect you’re going to tell me the truth,’ she went on. ‘Because you won’t, will you? That’s one of the rules of infidelity, isn’t it?’
‘No,’ he said.
‘Yes,’ she argued. ‘You make it sound like it was only going on five minutes and then, eventually, I’ll learn you’ve been together months, years, so that everything I thought was real wasn’t real at all. Talk about a recipe for making someone go mad. That’s what I keep doing, Edward: thinking of the past and what bits were real and what bits involved you faking happiness so you could spend more time with Nell.’
Anneliese slipped into the seat properly. She’d intended to sit on the edge in case she wanted to run out of the room because she couldn’t stand to look at him any longer, but the weariness came over her again.
‘Were you together at Beth’s wedding, for example?’
‘No,’ he shouted.
‘Well, when then? Christmas?’
He didn’t answer.
‘OK,’ said Anneliese. ‘Christmas then: you were together at Christmas. So when before Christmas did it start? Just tell me, so that I can draw a line under the time you were with her and remember the memories before that, because they were real. I hope they were real.’
Another thought occurred to her. Had there been somebody else, other women? A man who could cheat once, could have cheated before.
‘Was there anyone else, before Nell?’
‘No,’ he said. ‘There was never anyone else. I wish you didn’t think that of me –’
‘You mean you wish I didn’t think badly of you,’ Anneliese interrupted. ‘How can I not think badly of you, Edward? You cheated on me. If our marriage was so terrible, you should have told me. You could have given me a choice. But you didn’t. You played a game, where you stayed with me and waited for someone else to come along.’
That was one of the biggest injuries, she realised with stunning clarity. Instead of walking away from their marriage, he’d waited, thoughtfully watching. ‘Is that what you did?’ she demanded. ‘Waited, while looking around for someone, and Nell just happened to fit the bill?’
‘It wasn’t like that,’ he said. He leaned forward and put his head in his hands. ‘It wasn’t like that at all. You were…’
‘Oh, my fault again, right,’ said Anneliese bitterly. ‘I behaved in a particular way or I wasn’t what you wanted, and that’s why you had to look elsewhere.’
‘No,’ his voice was getting harsher. ‘I’m not saying it’s your fault. I’m saying we, we as a couple, had drifted apart, that’s all. I was vulnerable.’
‘Vulnerable to what?’ she demanded. ‘Vulnerable to Nell boosting your ego, telling you how fabulous you were?’
He flushed and she sensed that she’d made a direct hit. ‘That’s not a relationship, Edward. That sounds like something schoolgirls do. You’re so wonderful, Edward, why don’t you leave your boring wife to live with me? You know what, I wish you happiness.’
She pushed herself off the seat. She didn’t want to sit in the same room as him any more, there was no point. He wasn’t going to answer any of the questions she needed answers to, and this was too raw to talk about. She’d been doing it for Beth and, in truth, if Beth had understood either of them better, she wouldn’t have pushed them into this.
‘Edward, why don’t you go. We have nothing to say to each other.’
He got to his feet obediently. ‘I’m so sorry about Lily,’ he said. ‘I know it must be terrible for you. I know how much you loved her.’
‘Don’t talk about her like she’s already dead,’ snapped Anneliese, ‘because she’s not.’
The look Edward shot her was of pity. Anneliese turned around and went upstairs into her bedroom, slamming the door. She heard a car door bang shut and then the sound of tyres on the drive as Edward drove away.
Two weeks ago, Edward had been everything to her. They’d spent hours together, happy, content in each other’s company, or so she’d thought. Except that they hadn’t been happy, apparently. If it hadn’t been for a simple migraine that made her come home unexpectedly, she mightn’t have ever known that. The randomness and powerlessness of life hit her again. Why had she been so stupid as to think she had any control of her own life, because she didn’t.
‘Here we are,’ Jodi said as she drove over coral azalea petals lying like confetti on the driveway.
‘Oh my,’ breathed Izzie, as she caught sight of the house for the first time. It was early afternoon and bright sunlight painted the graceful façade of the house with a pale, shimmering gold. Set in the middle of a bower of trees and overgrown gardens, Rathnaree was like a graceful bride on her wedding day: no matter how lovely everyone else looked, your eyes were drawn only to her. ‘It’s beautiful.’
They parked beside the estate agent’s car and Izzie began to wander around the garden, touching shrubs and small statues, admiring it all, astonished at this beauty, something she’d grown up so close to and yet had never seen. Here, buried under a Japanese maple and covered with lichen, was a marble goddess with a half-smile on her soft lips.
Izzie ran her fingers over the smooth stone. Rathnaree was from another world and yet Izzie’s own family had been a part of it. To think that her family had worked here in this amazing house, her grandmother and her great-grandmother. And all these years it had remained undisturbed, preserved as if waiting for her to walk in.
‘Come on, Izzie,’ said Jodi, who’d seen the gardens and just wanted to get inside.
In
