throw little William away.
I pulled my eyes from her face, pale in the silver light. She loomed above me, tall in life, taller in the portrait. Her dress fell in cascades of lace-froth: the artist had caught it well. He made it look real.
The open shutters let in a chill and I felt a cold beyond any autumn frost. My skin rose in tiny bumps. She couldn’t throw William away. Only William wasn’t there any more … I took a step back toward the open window.
‘Sweet Jesu …’ I blinked away tears.
Mother’s eyes followed me.
‘Jesu wasn’t there, Jorg,’ she said. ‘Nobody came to save us. You watched us, Jorg. You watched, but you didn’t come to help.’
‘No.’ I felt the window sill cold against the back of my knees. ‘The thorns … the thorns held me.’
She looked at me, eyes silver with the moon. She smiled and I thought for a moment she would forgive me. Then she screamed. She didn’t scream the screams she’d made when the Count’s men raped her. I could have stood that. Maybe. She screamed the screams she made when they killed William. Ugly, hoarse, animal screams, torn from her perfect painted face.
I howled back. The words burst from me. ‘The thorns! I tried, Mother. I tried.’
He rose up from behind the bed then. William, sweet William with the side of his head caved in. The blood clotted black on his golden hair. The eye that side was gone, but the other held me.
‘You let me die, Jorg,’ he said. He spoke it past a bubbling in his throat.
‘Will.’ I couldn’t say any more.
He lifted a hand to me, white with the trickles of blood darkest crimson.
The window yawned behind me and I made to throw myself back through it, but as I did something jolted me forward. I staggered and righted myself. Will stood there, silent now.
‘Jorg! Jorg!’ A shout reached me, distant but somehow familiar.
I looked back toward the window and the dizzying fall.
‘Jump,’ said William.
‘Jump!’ Mother said.
But Mother didn’t sound like Mother any more.
‘Jorg! Prince Jorg!’ The shout came louder now, and a more violent jolt threw me to the floor.
‘Get out of the fucking way, boy.’ I recognized Makin’s voice. He stood framed in the doorway, lamplight behind. And somehow I lay on the floor at his feet. Not by the window. Not naked, but in my armour still.
‘You were jammed up against the door, Jorg,’ Makin said. ‘This Robart fellow told me to come running, and here you are screaming behind the door.’ He glanced around, looking for the danger. ‘I ran from the South Wing for your blasted nightmare did I?’ He shoved the door open wider and added a belated, ‘Prince.’
I got to my feet, feeling as if I’d been rolled on by Fat Burlow. There was no painting on the wall, no Mother, no Will behind the bed.
I drew my sword. I needed to kill Sageous. I wanted it so badly I could taste it, like blood, hot and salt in my mouth.
‘Jorg?’ Makin asked. He looked worried, as if he was wondering if I’d gone mad.
I moved toward the open door. Makin stepped to block me. ‘You can’t go out there with a drawn sword, Jorg, the guard would have to stop you.’
He didn’t stand as tall or as wide as Rike, but Makin was a big man, broad in the shoulder and stronger than a man should be. I didn’t think I could take him down without killing him.
‘It’s all about sacrifice, Makin,’ I said. I let my sword drop.
‘Prince?’ He frowned.
‘I’m going to let that tattooed bastard live,’ I said. ‘I need him.’ I glimpsed my mother again, fading. ‘I need to understand what game is being played out here. Who exactly the pieces are and who the players are.’
Makin’s frown deepened. ‘You get some sleep, Jorg. In the bed this time.’ He glanced back into the corridor. ‘Do you want some light in there?’
I smiled at that. ‘No,’ I said. ‘I’m not afraid of the dark.’
19
I woke early. A grey light through the shutters showed me the room for the first time: big, well-furnished, hunting tapestries on the walls. I uncoiled my fingers from my sword hilt, stretched and yawned. It didn’t feel right, this bed. It was too soft, too clean. When I threw the covers back they knocked the servant-bell from the bedside table. It hit the flagstones with a pretty tinkling then bounced onto a rug and lost its voice. Nobody came. That suited me fine: I’d dressed myself for four years. Hell, I’d rarely undressed! And what rags I had would be put to shame by the meanest of servant smocks. Even so. Nobody came.
I wore my armour over the grey tatters of my shirt. A looking-glass lay on the sideboard. I let it lie there face down. A quick run of fingers through hair in search of any louse fat enough to be found, and I was ready to break my fast.
First I threw the shutters open. No fumbling with the catch this time. I looked out over the execution yard, a square bounded by the blank walls of the Tall Castle. Kitchen-boys and maids hastened across the bleak courtyard, going about their various quests, blind to the pale wash of the sky so high above them.
I turned from the window and set off on my own little quest. Every prince knows the kitchens better than any other quarter of his castle. Where else can so much adventure be found? Where else is the truth spoken so plain? William and I learned a hundred times more in the kitchens of the Tall Castle than from our books on Latin and strategy. We’d steal ink-handed from Lundist’s study and sprint through long corridors, leaping down the stairs too many at a time, to reach the refuge of the kitchens.
I walked those same corridors now, ill at ease in the confined space. I’d spent too long under wide skies, living bloody. We learned about death in the kitchens too. We watched the cook turn live chickens to dead meat with a twist of his hands. We watched Ethel the Bread pluck the fat hens, leaving them naked in death, ready for gutting. You soon learn there’s no elegance or dignity in death if you spend time in the castle kitchens. You learn how ugly it is, and how good it tastes.
I turned the corner at the end of the Red Corridor, too full of memories to pay attention. All I saw was a figure bearing down on me. Instincts learned on the road took over. Before I had time to register the long hair and silks, I had her against the wall, a hand across her mouth and my knife to her throat. We were face by face and my captive held my stare, eyes an unreal green like stained glass. I let my snarl relax into a smile and unclenched my teeth. I stepped back, letting her off the wall.
‘Your pardon, my lady,’ I said, and sketched her a shallow bow. She was tall, nearly my height, and surely not many years my senior.
She gave me a fierce grin and wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. It came away bloody, from a bitten tongue. Gods but she was good to look at. She had a strong
