all mums experience their baby’s poo explosion just at the most inconvenient moment. Every baby should produce lots of wet nappies a day – if your Little One does not have several wet nappies, or if the wee looks dark, do go and see your doctor or a health professional to see if there is a problem.
How often should I feed my baby?
This is another question new mums have a lot of anxiety over, and understandably so. The health and well-being of your baby is a big responsibility, and you want to feel confident about the choices you make about how best to care for your baby. Getting the feeding right is where it all starts, so it’s good you are asking yourself this question – now here’s the information you need to put your mind at rest that you are doing a great job.
It is normal for a newborn baby to feed every two to three hours (timing it from when you started the feed, not when you finished it). Your new baby’s little stomach is the same size as their clenched fist, so they can only comfortably hold a small amount of milk in their tummy and then they will be ready for more – they really do need to feed that often.
Your baby is driven by an inner clock that demands food and cannot wait – they will scream, suck their fingers and work themselves up into a frenzy when they get hungry. All the while you have to get yourself a drink, go to the loo and get ready to feed again. Understandably it can be difficult to feel relaxed, but do take those few minutes you need to get ready before you start the feed, and then you’ll be in a better position to feed your baby for as long as they want and as often as they want. If your baby is crying while you are getting ready to feed, ask your partner, a relative or a friend to help calm the baby using the Up-Down Technique (see Chapter 3, Sleep, Calming and Creating Your Own Routine). The calmer the baby is, the more likely they are to latch on with ease.
The gap between feeds will get longer as the weeks and months go by, and your baby will become more efficient at getting the milk they need. It can be helpful for you and your family to acknowledge to yourselves that your baby cannot practise patience but you all can. When your baby gets upset it is not that they don’t like you or you are not doing a good job – just that your Little One can only focus on getting their own needs met and isn’t aware that you need to eat, drink, wash and sleep as well.
This demanding time is temporary, and in retrospect you’ll feel like it went by in a flash, though at the time when you are sleep-deprived and exhausted it may not feel that way. That’s why reminding yourself regularly of all you’ve achieved – bringing your baby into the world and sustaining them completely by the milk you give them is simply amazing. Recognising the wonderful, positive things you are doing for your child and family will increase your ability to cope and increase your own sense of well-being. It’ll be even better if your partner, family and friends tell you what a great mum you are, too (hint, hint).
As time goes by your confidence in your ability to interpret your baby’s needs will grow. As you get more practice at caring for your baby it will become a little easier day by day, and you’ll feel less anxious about getting things right and be more able to go with the flow. I believe knowing what to expect and shaping your day around the needs of your baby is a really good thing. You may hear people talk a lot about routines – though in my experience tiny babies do not have a strict routine, they don’t follow a timetable. After all, each child is unique – and though there are definitely general practices we can follow, they have to be shaped around that child and their family.
You will probably start to notice patterns developing and have a mini-routine going for about a week, and then things will change again (have a look at the adaptable mini-routines in Chapter 3). Many mothers find that a baby does not behave exactly the same two days in a row, so I think the secret to success is anticipating your baby’s needs but having enough flexibility to enjoy each day with your baby. Having too strict a structure can make mothers feel trapped, and that’s not good for them or their Little One.
Nap times and feed times will vary, but you can exercise influence over your day. You and your baby will develop a rhythm that helps you read them more easily so you can pick up on the cues that tell you they’re getting tired or hungry, and act on them before things escalate and tears appear. This is your baby and your life, so do what works for you. As long as your baby’s needs are met, all will be well.
Is it normal for me to be this hungry?
If you are breastfeeding, yes it is! You are very likely to have a much bigger appetite than usual when you start breastfeeding – you do need to eat (you can’t breastfeed a baby successfully on a salad and a crispbread). Many women crave carbohydrates, chocolate and sweet things because you need a good intake of carbohydrates to make that milk. You’ll want to balance this out with a good helping of protein-rich foods and adequate fats, plus plenty of fruits and vegetables each day.
In order to make rich, plentiful breast milk, eat at least three portions of carbohydrate a day. Healthy choices are cereals, oats, bread, potatoes, rice and pasta – they are all a good source of carbohydrate as part of a balanced diet.
Never try to diet when breastfeeding, as you need your calories from a wide range of foods for nutrients (particularly no-carb or very low-carb regimes are no good for milk production). This is because breast milk has a high proportion of carbohydrate (if your milk leaks you’ll see that when it dries it starches your clothing, which shows the sugar levels in the breast milk made by a good intake of carbohydrate).
Eat the foods you want and like, and only avoid foods if you think they are upsetting you or the baby. Tastes do change during pregnancy and during breastfeeding, so it may be you can no longer stomach that old favourite but you are craving things you didn’t like before. Many women find they can’t eat certain foods whilst breastfeeding, and if you notice your baby is very grumpy and difficult to settle or satisfy all of a sudden, look back over the past 24 hours to see if you’ve eaten or drunk something that might have disagreed with them. It may be that some foods that are high in fibre like bran or new potatoes, or too many fresh berries or fruit juice may upset the breast milk. It may also change your LO’s poos, but this can be difficult to detect as normal poo is runny and explosive anyway.
I remember when ... my daughter Amy had just had her baby and I was staying with them to help out for the first couple of weeks. Baby Ava would feed all night long, and I used to bring Amy tea and toast in the middle of the night as it was feed, feed, feed and she needed to eat and drink enough to keep on going. I would often sit up and chat and laugh with her till the sun came up to help Amy make it through those long nights, and then once the baby had finally had enough (at about breakfast time) I used to make Amy some breakfast, and then look after the baby while she got a few hours’ much-needed sleep.
Solutions to common breastfeeding problems
Sore nipples
Having sore or painful nipples is probably the most frequently experienced problem women have when breastfeeding. In the first week it can be the result of your baby first learning to feed and your milk coming in, and it can be a toe-curling experience.
When your baby first starts to suck it may be painful for the first few seconds. If the pain persists, check the position of your baby – they may be sucking on the end of the nipple and not getting the big mouthful of breast they get when correctly attached (revisit the Latching Technique section at the beginning of this chapter). If this happens, slip your little finger in at the corner of their mouth and break the suction. Adjust your position and try using a pillow if you want to (even if you are out and about, there are little travel cushions you can slip into the change bag to make life easier when feeding in public). Raise the baby up and bring them up to the breast. Check they are nose to nipple and ensure they have an open mouth coming from below the breast to latch on, getting as much of the brown area of the
