Alfie.
“I don’t think so,” said Aunt Liv, looking puzzled. She turned to Mum. “There used to be about a hundred of those horses next door at Keldacombe Farm, but they’ve been gone for quite a while now. They’re due to be sold soon.”
Gem gasped. “Is there a hundred now?” Then she said in a spooky kind of voice, “Like the story about the hundredth horse.”
“What story?” said Aunt Liv.
“It’s like… I think it’s if there’s a hundred horses then something special happens.”
“There were only ninety-nine at Rita’s, though,” Alfie said.
“No, but I mean if there are then the hundredth horse is magic or something… but I can’t remember exactly now.”
“Gem,” Aunt Liv interrupted, “where did you hear that nonsense?”
But Gem was looking at Alfie, who was making a face as if he was trying to make her be quiet.
“Somebody told me in the playground, ages ago,” Gem sulked.
Aunt Liv shook her head. She turned to Mum.
“It’s just some silly old wives’ tale.”
Gem mouthed, No, it’s not, and folded her arms.
Aunt Liv rolled her eyes and turned back to Mum, who had her hands on her hips, waiting for a proper explanation.
“I’ll have a chat to Rita at the farm,” Aunt Liv said. “See if she knows anything about the horse. Really, it’s nothing to worry about.”
“I think there was a girl on the horse,” I said, careful not to say anything about the carousel case. “But I didn’t really see.”
My cousins looked at each other, their eyes wide. Aunt Liv sighed, like you do when you’ve just worked something out and wish you hadn’t.
“Oh,” she said. “Perhaps that means Angel’s back.”
I noticed Gem nudge Alfie and he shushed and glared at her.
“And what’s that supposed to mean?” said Mum.
“Oh, nothing,” Aunt Liv said. “There was a girl who used to hang around the horses on Rita’s farm. There was some trouble. I think she was caught stealing at the supermarket.”
Mum had a look on her face now that said, Did I really agree to this?
“Anyway,” Aunt Liv said, as if she wished she hadn’t mentioned it, “I heard her family moved away some time ago now, so nothing to worry about.”
There was a heavy silence as Mum put on her jacket and tugged her sleeves straight. Oh, good, I thought. She’s taking me home again.
“Well, as long as you’re sure you’re OK, Nell, because I have to get back now. I need to finish preparing for the conference.”
I held on to her. Because I wasn’t OK and I had nothing I wanted to stay for. Not now the carousel had gone.
“Don’t worry, Cathy,” Aunt Liv said. “We’ll take very good care of Nell.”
Mum and Aunt Liv had a private chat outside the door before Mum kissed me about fourteen times and squeezed me in a hug. I linked my fingers round her waist so she couldn’t pull away. But she did.
“No, Mum,” Alfie said.
“Not me,” said Gem, wriggling into her pyjamas.
“Oh, well,” Aunt Liv muttered. “Perhaps I put it somewhere else.”
I looked around the room. The walls were half straight and half sloping in Alfie and Gem’s bedroom, like we were in the roof. There was a small low window and a big colourful mess under the bunk beds. There was also a mattress made up into a bed on the floor. I could tell which bed was mine, even though Gem pointed and said, “This is mine, this is Alfie’s and that’s yours.”
My cousins squabbled about where they were sleeping because they both wanted to be on the bottom bunk nearest to me. In the end Aunt Liv put a pillow at either end and said, “Just for tonight, then back in your own beds.”
It’s funny, but when you’re little like them, anybody new is really interesting.
When Aunt Liv had gone, Alfie crawled under the covers and came up next to Gem. They lay on their fronts with their chins in their hands and stared at me.
“Have you got a horse?” said Alfie.
“No,” I said.
“Have you got a pig?” said Gem.
“No,” I said, realising this game could go on for a long time.
“Have you got a monkey?” Gem said.
So I said, “I haven’t got any animals.”
Gem made a sad face. They whispered to each other.
“We’ve got a pig,” said Alfie. “Her name’s Maggie.”
“She’s a kunekune pig and she’s going to have some babies,” said Gem.
“Any day now,” said Alfie.
They were quiet for a bit, just staring at me.
I couldn’t stop thinking about the carousel. I’d found something unexpected, something that made me feel brilliant inside. Now it was gone and it left my stomach churning. I shouldn’t have taken it in the first place. Isn’t that what Mum wanted, what we had both wanted, though? Everything of his to be gone.
I suddenly felt far away from home, far away from everything.
“Do you want your mum?” said Gem.
She was right. I wanted my bed, my room and my mum.
“Lights out,” said Aunt Liv, coming back and flicking the light switch.
She knelt down, tucked the duvet tight around me, held my hand to look at the graze.
“I feel sick,” I said. “I want to go home.”
She kissed me softly on the cheek. Her hair smelled like summer.
“I know,” she said. “It always feels like this when you’re away from your mum and
