two princesses bristled at each other like a couple of cats.
“What a funny little place you have here,” observed the Dovre princess. “Quite rustic. I see you have a sod roof. At home in the Dovrefell, our hall is so high that the roof is carved from ice.”
“That must be very chilly,” the Troll Fell princess smiled. “Here we enjoy simple comfort, and despise ostentation.”
“I imagine you have to,” replied the Dovre princess.
“Will you dance?” asked the Troll Fell prince hastily. But his bride said she was tired and would rather sit. The couples sat stiffly down together, and the Troll Fell princess yawned.
“Now then! Brighten up!” shouted the Gaffer. He and the Dovreking were laughing and drinking, and seemed to be getting along famously. “You’re not allowed to quarrel till after you’re married, remember. You boys, give your brides a hug and a kiss. Don’t be shy!”
“Vulgar old fellow,” muttered the Dovre princess.
“Let’s exchange gifts,” boomed the King of the Dovrefell. “That’ll cheer them all up. We brought a few small things from the Dovrefell.”
He snapped his fingers. Two stout trolls stepped forward with a heavy sack. The untied the neck and poured out a stream of jewels. Diamonds, rubies, amethysts, emeralds, rattled out like peas and lay on the floor in a shimmering drift – or bounced and rolled under the tables. Baldur and Grim crashed heads as they lunged to pick up a skipping diamond.
“Very pretty,” said the Gaffer. He beckoned to various servants who came staggering out with piles of gold: necklaces, rings, bracelets, chains and crowns. “Part of a dragon’s hoard,” said the Gaffer, waving a casual hand. Peer glanced at his uncles. Their mouths were wet with excitement.
The Dovreking frowned and snapped his fingers again. This time his trolls laid out heaps of beautifully woven and embroidered clothes, each one of which would have taken a human seamstress a year to make. But these were not made by mortals. There were scarves snipped from the trailing ends of the Northern Lights; petticoats trimmed with the most delicate frost; seven-league boots lined in ermine. The Troll Fell princess got a cloak of moonshine that pleased her so much she threw her arms around the Dovreking and gave him a kiss.
“Aha!” said the Dovreking, pinching her cheek. But the Gaffer grinned triumphantly and signalled to Peer and Hilde.
“Now for a little extra – a special present,” he gloated. “You won’t have brought anything like this from the Dovrefell!”
Peer caught Hilde’s eye. Together they stepped forward. Better make a good job of it, thought Peer gloomily, and he bowed low. Hilde curtsied. The three-tailed princess screamed in mock terror and clutched her bridegroom’s arm. “Oooh! What is it? What are they for?”
“Something you don’t see every day,” the Gaffer boasted. “Your new servants!”
“Humans!”
“Yes, of course,” broke in the Troll Fell princess. She pushed the pile of jewels with a contemptuous toe. “We see so much of this kind of thing. We wanted to be original!”
The two free tails of the Dovre princess swished angrily; the one knotted up above her face could only twitch. “What a strange idea. They’re very pale. All that unhealthy daylight, I suppose. Is this the girl? Turn around. I thought so! This ugly creature has no tail at all. Take her away at once and fix one on!”
“No!” Hilde cried.
“We don’t have tails,” Peer shouted. “We think they’re ugly!”
The Dovre princess screamed. “Oh, what an insult!”
The Gaffer stepped in, bowing as gallantly as he could. “Now, now,” he rumbled. “No cause for concern. We all appreciate your beauty, my dear. I myself have three eyes,” he coughed modestly, “but three tails are rare indeed.”
His own daughter scowled. The Dovre princess simpered.
“No,” the Gaffer went on, “we’ve simply neglected one small ceremony. After that, these humans will see things as we do. Here, you two!” He snapped his fingers and led them aside.
“Ceremony?” asked Peer apprehensively.
The Gaffer nodded. “You haven’t yet tasted our beer. A single sip of the bog-wife’s brew, and you’ll see things our way for ever and ever!”
“For ever?” Peer repeated slowly.
“Excuse me – but we’ll think the Dovre princess is beautiful?” asked Hilde.
“You will indeed,” said the Gaffer.
“And the food?” Peer was too shaken to mince his words. “We’ll enjoy eating frog soup and rat stew? And the music? It sounds like – like a cat on the roof, or a cow in pain.”
“It’s giving me a headache,” Hilde added.
“I’m getting annoyed!” The Gaffer squared up to them. “See here! We can’t have servants that don’t admire us. Once you’ve drunk our brew you’ll think black is white. You think night is day and day is night. And so they are! It’s only another way of seeing.”
“But then,” said Hilde, appalled, “we won’t be us. We are what we think!” She looked around wildly. “We won’t be humans any more. Inside, we’ll be trolls!”
“AND WHAT’S THE MATTER WITH THAT?” roared the Gaffer.
Peer and Hilde stared at the glittering crowds, and then at each other. Everything was very sharp and clear, and also a little distant. Peer tasted fear, sour in his mouth. Between the red pillars supporting the roof he could see the dark spaces of the night sky. Out there lay freedom, the snowy slopes, the stars. But he would never reach it.
We’ll never escape, he thought. We’ll never follow the stream out of the hill.
Once he and Hilde had drunk a drop of the bog-wife’s beer, they wouldn’t even want to leave. They would live the rest of their lives like earthworms buried under Troll Fell. They would still look the same, but on the inside they would have changed completely. Peer thought he would rather be dead.
One of the Gaffer’s trolls came trotting up. Dimly Peer recognised it: the kitchen troll with the long beak. It bowed to the Gaffer, presenting a golden cup. The cup was Ralf ’s cup – the Bride Cup – and it was half full of brown beer.
“Right!” Briskly the Gaffer lashed his tail. “Who’s going first?”
Hilde met Peer’s eyes, despairing but steady. “I’m sorry I got you into this, Peer.”
“You didn’t,” said Peer. “I wanted to come.”
She reached for the cup, but Peer was quicker and snatched it up. “Wait!” he said breathlessly.
He looked into the cup. The dark liquid swirled, a bottomless whirlpool. He glanced up, to see the world for the last time as
