from me to the grand visitor. ‘No!’ she cried, instinctively sensing danger. ‘No, Mette. Make them go away.’
Marie of Bourbon glided forward and knelt by Catherine’s stool. With a smile and a touch she tried to reassure the trembling child. ‘Do not be frightened, my little one,’ she cooed. ‘There is nothing to fear. Your name is Catherine, is it not? Well, Catherine, you are a very lucky girl. You are going to a beautiful abbey where kind nuns will look after you and you will be safe. You will like that, will you not?’
Catherine was not fooled by a soft voice and a tender touch. ‘No! No, I want to stay with Mette.’ Like a whirlwind, she jumped off her stool and ran to my side, closely followed by little Charles, curds dribbling down his chin.
Still on my knees, I put my arms around them, tears springing to my eyes. ‘I am sorry, Madame,’ I gulped, avoiding the lady’s gaze. ‘There has been much upheaval in their lives lately and I am all they know.’
Marie of Bourbon rose and her tone became brisk as her patience grew thin. ‘That may be, but these are no ordinary children. They have been woefully neglected and it is time they were given the training they need and deserve. I will be taking Charles with me now. He is my father’s godson and he is to live in his household and receive the proper education for a prince. You are to prepare Catherine for her journey to Poissy Abbey. She will be leaving tomorrow morning.’ She waved an imperious hand at her servant. ‘Get the boy. We are leaving.’
Before he realised what was happening, Charles was swept up in a pair of sturdy arms. He set up a shrill screech and began to kick and struggle, but the woman had been picked for her strength and his puny efforts were stolidly ignored.
‘No! Put him down!’ Catherine screamed and ran at the woman, swinging on her arm and trying unsuccessfully to dislodge her brother. With tears of fear and frustration, the little girl turned to me. ‘Mette, don’t let them take him! Help him!’
Miserably, I shook my head and wrung my hands. What could I do? Who was I against the might of Burgundy, Bourbon and Berry? Our last sight of Charles was of his agonised, curd-spattered face and his outstretched hands as his captor descended the stairs but the sound of his screams persisted, punctuated by Catherine’s sobs. Marie of Bourbon’s cheeks were flushed and her expression grim as she stood in the doorway and gave me final instructions, raising her voice above the commotion.
‘I will come for Catherine at the same time tomorrow. See that she is prepared to leave. I do not want any more scenes like this. They are vulgar and unpleasant and not good for the children.’
‘Yes, Madame.’
I had bowed my head dutifully, but my deference disguised a mind whirling with wild rebellious notions. Could I whisk Catherine off to the bake house and raise her as my own child? Could I flee with her to some remote village? Could I take her to the queen? But even as these ideas flashed through my mind, I knew that no such course of action was feasible. Catherine was the king’s daughter, a crown asset. Stealing her would be treason. We would be hunted down and I would be put to death and how would that help her, or my own family? To say nothing of myself! As for taking her to the queen – I did not even know where she was, let alone how to get there.
I suppose I should have been grateful that we had another day together, that Catherine had not also been carried instantly to a closed litter, while Burgundy’s guards turned deaf ears to her heart-rending screams. At least I had a few hours to prepare her for our separation and to try and convince her that it was for the best.
How do you persuade a little girl of not quite four that what is about to happen is not the worst thing in the world when, like her, you completely believe that it is? How was I to make my voice say things that my heart utterly denied? I had heard cows bellowing in the fields when their calves were taken from them and I could feel a thunderous bellow welling up inside me; one that, if I let it out, would surely be heard throughout the whole kingdom. But I knew that I could not – must not – if I was to help Catherine face up to her inevitable future.
At first she wept and put her hands over her ears, screwing up her eyes as she cried, ‘No, Mette, no. I won’t leave you. They c-cannot make me. I will stay here and you can f-fetch Charles back and we will be happy, like we were b-before.’
I held her tightly in my arms. She was shaking and hiccupping. Wretched though I felt, I had to deny her. ‘No, Catherine. You must understand that you cannot stay here and that you and I cannot be together any more. You have to go and learn how to be a princess.’
She broke away from me and started shouting indignantly, ‘But why? You are my nurse. You have always looked after me. I thought you loved me, Mette.’
Ah, dear God, it was soul-destroying! Loved her? I more than loved her. She was an essential part of my being. Losing her would be like losing my hands or tearing out my heart, but I had to tell her that although I loved her, I had to let her go. She was not my daughter but the king’s and she had to do what her father wished.
‘But the king is mad,’ she cried. ‘We saw him in the garden. He does not care about me. He does not even know who I am.’
Out of the mouths of babes …! It was heartbreakingly true. He and his queen may have loved Dauphin Charles, the golden boy who had died, but none of the rest of their surviving offspring could be said to have benefited from one morsel of parental concern.
‘But God cares,’ I responded, grasping at straws. ‘God loves you and you will be going to His special house where His nuns will look after you and keep you safe.’
‘Does He love me as much as you do?’ Her breath was shuddery and in her little flushed face her eyes were round and questioning. My darling little Catherine. Those enchanting, deep sapphire eyes seemed to hold the entire meaning of my life, even reddened and swollen as they were. The image of them would stay with me for ever.
‘Oh yes,’ I lied. Call it blasphemy if you like, but I swear that the Almighty could not have loved that little girl as much as I did. ‘He loves us all and you must remember His commandment – the one about honouring your father and your mother, which means you must do as they say.’
‘But that lady said it was the Duke of Burgundy who sent her. He is not my father. I hate him. I do not have to do as he says, do I?’
Sometimes, I thought, she was far too bright for her own good.
Involuntarily, I touched my cheek, which would always bear the mark of Burgundy’s vicious, studded gauntlet and swallowed hard on the bile his name inspired. ‘Well, yes, Catherine you do, because he is your father’s cousin and helps him to rule his kingdom.’
I could sense her desperate resistance crumbling. Her shoulders drooped and her lower lip began to tremble. ‘What about my mother? Does she want me to go away to this place?’
Who knew what the queen wanted? I had heard that she and Orleans had raised an army, but so far no other news of her had reached my ears.
‘I am sure the queen agrees with the king,’ I answered lamely, casting about in my mind for some way of distracting her. ‘Now, supposing we go out for a bit? Shall we go and light a candle to the Virgin and ask her to protect and keep us until we meet again?’ I hoped the guards would not stop us going to the chapel and that its peaceful atmosphere might calm us both. I might pray for a miracle, I thought, but in my heart I knew that not even the Blessed Marie would be able to save us from Marie of Bourbon.
I was so proud of my darling girl when she took her leave
