Serious Survival: How to Poo in the Arctic and Other essential tips for explorers. Bruce Parry
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CAN YOU stop all your lotions and potions freezing?
Only if they’re somewhere warm, which basically means tucking anything that might freeze inside your clothes near to your body, or thawing them out overnight by taking them into your sleeping bag with you. Rucksacks or cases will be well below zero whether inside your tent or not, and anything left in them will be frozen solid.
This means some careful thought about what to take on the expedition. For example, do you need shampoo, deodorant and all those creams? (Most would say not – you won’t be doing much by way of washing.) And what about toothpaste? (Many would say yes, feeling that fresh breath is worth the space taken up by the tube in the sleeping bag.)
WILL CONTACT LENSES freeze to your eyes?
A common worry, but actually highly unlikely. As soon as the temperature plummets you should hopefully be wearing goggles, which will keep the icy wind off your eyes. More likely is for eyes to freeze shut as a result of them watering in the cold and the eyelashes freezing together. A warm hand placed over the eye will soon thaw it out.
Contact lenses are actually more practical in the Arctic than glasses, which are awkward to wear under goggles and are forever steaming up and freezing over. Not to say that lenses don’t have their own problems. Keeping fluids and unused lenses from freezing is another logistical nightmare.
The temperature inside the Serious Arctic base camp, erected on the frozen sea, rarely crept above freezing point. First job in the morning was scraping the ice off the ceiling.
After a hard day on the ice at –40°C (–40°F) with an Arctic gale blowing, there’s nothing quite like the thought of getting back inside your tent. The only slight problem is that if you’re on the move you’ll first have to put it up. And don’t imagine your sleeping tent is going to be warm and toasty like a room back home. If you’re lucky it might be no colder than a freezer.
Choose a tent designed to withstand Arctic storms, and before the expedition begins practise putting it up quickly with thick mitts on. You might have to do it for real in atrocious weather.
The polar pyramid tents below, used in Serious Arctic, are large enough to allow some cooking.
Flaps at ground level round the tent are piled up with snow to help anchor it in the wind.
Guy ropes are secured with ice screws on the frozen sea (which is covered here in a layer of snow). On deep snow away from the sea they may be attached to a buried ski pole or other improvised anchor (known as a ‘deadman’). A top tip is to pee in the snow above the ‘deadman’ – as the wee freezes it helps make it more secure.
STOVES
Using stoves in small tents can be very dangerous (one for the experts only), so all melting of snow and cooking will probably be done in a larger, main expedition tent. The goods news is that as a result this tent may get pretty warm in the evening. But fuel is precious and likely to be in short supply. This means once supper is over the stoves will go off for the night and the temperature will plummet.
Note that whenever stoves are on there is serious risk of fire – and carbon monoxide poisoning. Although it may go against the grain when it’s so cold outside, it’s absolutely vital to ensure there is enough ventilation.
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