novels don’t get much better than Mallery’s expert blend of emotional nuance, humor and superb storytelling.”—Booklist
This one is for 2012 Fool’s Gold Co-Head Cheerleader Michele, whose energy is surpassed only by her heart. Thanks, Michele, for everything! You’re incredible!
Fifteen years ago...
PATIENCE MCGRAW COULDN’T breathe. She placed her hand on top of her chest and wondered if it was possible to have a heart attack and die from fear. Or maybe anticipation. Her mind raced and her throat was tight and here she was, on possibly the most significant day of her life, and she couldn’t catch her breath. Talk about lame.
“The snow’s melting,” Justice said, pointing toward the mountains just east of town.
Patience looked up and nodded. “It’s getting warmer.”
It’s getting warmer? She held in a groan. Why did she have to sound so stupid? Why did she have to be so nervous? This was Justice, her best friend since he’d moved to Fool’s Gold at the beginning of October last year. They’d met in the school cafeteria and they’d reached for the last cupcake. He’d let her have it; she’d offered to share. She figured because he was older, he would refuse, but he’d smiled instead and that day they’d become friends.
She knew him. They hung out together, played video games together, went to the movies together. It was fun. It was easy. Or it had been until a few weeks ago when she’d suddenly looked into Justice’s dark blue eyes and felt something she’d never experienced before.
Her mom had reassured her it was normal. Patience was fourteen, Justice was sixteen and it was unlikely they would stay friends forever. But Patience wasn’t sure she liked the change. Before, she hadn’t had to think about everything she said or worry about what she wore, or how her hair looked. Now she was always thinking, which made it hard to just hang out.
After two months of sweating every word, every thought, every action, she was done. She was going to tell Justice the truth. That she liked him. That she wanted him to be more than her best friend. If he liked her back, well, she didn’t know what would happen then, but she was sure it would be wonderful. If he didn’t, she would probably die of a broken heart.
They walked through the quiet residential neighborhood of Fool’s Gold. The small town was nestled in the foothills of the Sierra Nevadas. With spring chasing away winter, there were buds on trees and the first daffodils and tulips of the season swayed in the afternoon breeze. All of which had nothing to do with the fact that she was seriously scared. Because while talking about dying of a broken heart was very Pride and Prejudice—her mother’s favorite book and movie—it might be painful and a little gross.
But she had to know. Had to stop wondering. She should just tell him and get it over with. There was a school dance in two weeks and she wanted to go with Justice.
She was pretty sure he didn’t like anyone else. Although he was two years older than her, he didn’t have a girlfriend and they always hung out together at lunch. Not that he’d tried to kiss her. She wasn’t sure how she felt about kissing, but if she was going to have a boy kiss her, she wanted it to be Justice. Oh God, why did her stomach hurt so much?
“Patience?”
She jumped. “Huh?”
“Are you okay?”
She came to a stop and clutched her books to her chest. “I’m fine. Why do you ask?”
“You’re quiet. Is something wrong?”
His eyes were so beautiful, she thought. Dark, dark blue. They crinkled a little at the corners when he laughed, which wasn’t that often. He had a great smile. He was still kind of skinny, as if he’d grown too fast, but cute. And sweet to her.
“Justice, I need to ask you something.”
He nodded and waited, facing her. “Sure. What?”
She opened her mouth, then closed it. Words disappeared as she got lost in fear and panic and—
“Hey, Justice.”
They both turned and saw Ford Hendrix crossing the street toward them. Patience exhaled, both relieved and frustrated by the interruption.
Ford was one of six kids. Dark hair and eyes. All the girls thought he was hot, but Patience only saw Justice.
“Could you believe that history test?” Ford asked. He and Justice were the same age and had a lot of classes together. “Hey, Patience.”
“Hi.”
They all fell into step together, walking toward home, the moment lost.
“Man, why do we have to know that stuff?” Ford asked. “World War One was like a hundred years ago or something. That essay question...”
“Brutal,” Justice finished for him.
Patience glanced at him and saw he was watching her, his expression questioning. She swallowed as she realized he might ask her what she’d wanted to talk about and she couldn’t possibly say anything in front of Ford. He was a nice enough guy, but no way!
“I, um, need to get home,” Patience said. “I’m going to cut through here. See you tomorrow.”
“Patience, wait.”
But she ignored Justice and hurried away, ducking around a house and through a backyard as she made her escape.
* * *
THE NEXT MORNING, Patience was determined not to wait another second to tell Justice the truth. She’d spent a horrible night tossing and turning, feeling a little sick to her stomach. She couldn’t keep doing this to herself. She was going to be brave. She was going to be honest. If things went really bad, she was sure her mom would be willing to move.
She walked from her house to Justice’s, as she had every school morning for months now. He lived a couple of blocks closer to town so he was on her way. As she walked down the sidewalk, she looked at the small two-bedroom house he shared with his uncle. Normally Justice would be sitting on the porch steps, waiting for her. Only he wasn’t there this morning.
Did he know? Had he figured out what she wanted to tell him? Was he disgusted? Did he think she was a complete dork and was so embarrassed he couldn’t speak to her?
Anxiety propelled her up the stairs. If it was bad, she wanted to hear it fast. He should just tell her the truth so she wouldn’t hope. Then her heart would break and she could get over it and...
She paused on the porch as she realized the front door was partially open. As if someone had left it that way in a hurry. She frowned as she moved forward.
“Justice? Are you okay?”
She knocked once and the door swung open.
She’d been in the small
