isn’t anything...really.’
‘It’s something.’
‘Well, it’s just that of late...’ She stopped and shook her head.
‘Yes? Come on, tell me. If it is in my power to give it, I will.’
‘It will probably sound silly to you. But...oh, I so wish I could have a room of my own. A room I can do whatever I want in. Where people have to knock before they come in. A room that nobody can ever turn me out of...’ She faltered to a halt as tears stung her eyes. She hadn’t realised how precious privacy was, until she’d been forced out of her childhood home, and had to rely on the grudging charity of others. Even here, in London, she had to share not only a room, but a bed, with two other girls. They’d made space for her, but it was just a corner. And she was sick of having to make do with just claiming a corner of other people’s rooms.
‘You want security,’ he said, once more hitting the nail on the head. ‘I can give you that. And as for privacy, well, I have several properties. And you may have your very own room in each one of them.’
‘Really?’ It sounded too good to be true. ‘But I still don’t understand why...’
‘Never you mind about why,’ he grated. ‘Just think about this.’ And without further ado, he pulled her into his arms, and kissed her again. And this time, there was nothing gentle, or tentative, about it. This kiss was one that claimed her, body and soul. She had no more chance of escaping him than a snowball did of surviving in the kitchen fire.
She melted into him, swept away by his ardour, her own body’s clamouring and the joyous thought that if she agreed to his proposal, she would have a place of her own. Money to spend as she wanted.
And kisses like this.
She came out of her blissful haze to the sound of Dotty and Lotty, shrieking.
And opened her eyes to see them speeding across the ice towards her.
Lord Havelock spun round to face them, his arm snaking round her waist as they offered their congratulations on a betrothal she hadn’t actually voiced her agreement to.
But she couldn’t very well say so. Why else would she have been kissing a man, in broad daylight, unless it was because they’d just become engaged?
Then something struck her. ‘You can both skate. You don’t need Mr Morgan to stop you falling over at all!’
Dotty and Lotty, completely unabashed, giggled, took her by an arm each and towed her away from her...well, she supposed she had to call him her fiancé.
‘If he’d known we could skate, do you think he would have let us hang on to him like that? He’s the most hardened case in town. Girls have been trying to get him to the altar since...oh, for ever, and nobody has yet got as far as either of us did today.’
She blinked at them in shock. They’d been pretending they couldn’t skate, just so they could get close to him?
She’d never heard of anything so...unscrupulous!
Unless it was letting everyone think she’d just accepted a proposal, when she had no intention of doing any such thing.
He held her hand, in the carriage, all the way home.
She could have tugged it free, she supposed, but then she would have to explain herself.
And she had no excuse. None. She couldn’t very well claim Lord Havelock had forced those kisses on her. She’d put her arms round him and kissed him back. With some enthusiasm.
And Dotty and Lotty looked so pleased for her. Even Mr Morgan had a twinkle in his eye, and a smile that softened that stern mouth whenever he glanced at their clasped hands.
Her stomach clenched into a cold, hard knot. If she made any attempt, now, to tell them they’d all made a terrible mistake, then...well, she wasn’t sure quite what would happen, but there was bound to be a dreadful scene. She’d upset everyone badly enough by shouting at a man in public. What would they make of her kissing one?
It would be better to wait till they got home. She’d beg a few moments alone with her aunt, and try to explain what had happened. And then...
And then the carriage stopped, and Lotty and Dotty leapt out and went bounding up the front steps, shrieking out the news of her betrothal.
And when Aunt Pargetter came to the front door, it was to Lord Havelock she held out her hands. Even when Mary made frantic signals, behind his back, to try to convey her need to speak with her, she paid no heed.
‘In a moment, Mary,’ she said. ‘His lordship wants to have a private word with me first. Since Mr Pargetter is not at home just now. Though I can guess what you want to say,’ she finished, shooting him an arch look.
‘No, no, I don’t think you could possibly...’ she said, though her voice was drowned out by Lord Havelock saying, ‘My behaviour has been a little unconventional. I should have approached you, that is to say, Mr Pargetter, first, and asked your permission to pay my addresses.’
‘Not at all,’ said Aunt Pargetter, ushering him into her husband’s study. ‘We aren’t legally Mary’s guardians, you know. She is free to make her own choices.’
‘Nevertheless...’
And then the study door closed on whatever he’d been about to say, leaving Mary on the wrong side of it.
Free to make her own choices! If only that were true.
And then Dotty and Lotty were shooing her into the front parlour and divesting her of her coat.
‘She’s in a complete daze,’ said Dotty, untying the ribbons of her bonnet.
‘No wonder,’ said Lotty, pushing her into a chair. ‘His lordship swept her completely off her feet.’
‘No, he didn’t, it was the opposite. He stopped her slipping over,’ quipped Dotty with a giggle. ‘Got his arm round her waist and held her so tight she couldn’t possibly have lost her footing.’
‘Oh, I’ve never seen anything so romantic.’
‘Romantic? No! I...’
‘Oh, but it was,’ sighed Dotty, pressing her hands to her heart and flinging herself backwards on to the sofa as though in a swoon.
‘Aren’t you cross with me? Why aren’t you cross with me? When the whole purpose of going skating at all was to try and...and... Well, you were both trying so hard to attract Mr Morgan....’
Who was nowhere in sight, she suddenly realised. The moment they’d gone into the house, he’d slipped away, unnoticed in all the excitement.
‘Oh, that’s so sweet,’ said Lotty. ‘And so like you, to think of us, rather than yourself.’
Dotty bounced off the sofa, and
