had been in a most obscure manner. Despite her promises to be strong it ached to think they had once been the best of friends and here they were engaging in small talk like a pair of acquaintances.
He made no apology and did not seem even to notice the awkwardness of the situation.
‘It was a couple of weeks ago,’ he continued, ‘when I overheard several women in my office talking about this amazing new column called Single and Loving It!. Because of the column they had decided to cancel their plans to go to a nightclub that weekend and were instead going to have a few girlfriends around for a night at home.’
Kelly listened in silence to the familiar story, concentrating on his expression as he retold the tale. And where usually people would have a glimmer in their eye, as if they were sharing in some grand inside joke about the perils of singlehood, Simon watched her with a shuttered expression, all evidence of good humour gone.
‘I was about to move on until one of them said, “That Kelly Rockford is my new hero. She’s a genius. I wish she had been writing this column five years ago. Would have saved me a lot of wasted Saturday nights.” Understandably that caught my attention.’
The corner of his mouth kicked, revealing a sexy crease in his right cheek. You cannot keep a good smile down, Kelly thought, feeling her stomach warm absurdly in response.
‘I asked around, found Fresh, and saw not genius but sadness. I saw not the wit and vivacity of the Kelly Rockford I had once known but hostility and bitterness that I refused to believe could come from the same woman. Even when your picture appeared above your byline, I had to come and see for myself in order to believe it was really you.’
He stopped talking and looked her over. Kelly straightened up under the meticulous inspection.
‘You’ve changed, Kell.’
The shortening of her name flowed over her like the endearment it once had been. She shook it off.
‘Not surprising,’ she scoffed, ‘considering it has been five years.’
‘Still…’ His voice trailed off.
Still what? she ached to ask. Still you expected me to be the bubbly bundle of fun and fancy I was at eighteen. Well, you’re the one who eradicated that girl, my friend.
‘Am I to take it that after five years of nothing, after five years of not having the courtesy to let me know if you were dead or alive, you are only now back simply to assure yourself that I have not become all bitter and twisted?’
After five years of my not knowing if you were healthy and happy. If you had moved on to other relationships. Or if you still missed me so much it physically hurt.
His mouth opened. He had something to say, Kelly was sure of it. She waited in agonising anticipation for answers to questions that had plagued her for years. But he must have thought better of it and clammed his mouth shut. And that was enough for Kelly to regain her purpose. She gathered up every last ounce of courage and laid it on the line.
‘Well, for whatever reason you are here, you are here. And we have managed to avoid talking about this since we haven’t, well, talked in the last five years. But this is just ridiculous. We really can’t go on being married.’
His warm eyes glossed over so fast, so icy cold, it made her shiver. ‘Is there someone else you wish to be married to?’ he asked. He took a slow bite of his bread but his gaze held fast to hers.
‘No!’ Kelly shook her head manically and flapped her hands in front of her face.
Simon’s smile warmed up again, this time even enough to showcase a sexy crease on each cheek and she cringed.
Hmm. Probably could have made that ‘no’ less emphatic.
‘So what’s the rush?’ he asked, his expression a model of nonchalance.
If my readers find out I am married, my life as I know it is all over! That’s the rush!
‘Five years is hardly a rush. And considering I could not find you for the first three, that shortens the time span a little.’
The last of the cool in his eyes melted. ‘You looked for me?’
‘What do you think I did? Do you think I just said, “Oh, well, my husband has disappeared, but them’s the breaks, so may as well get on with the rest of my life”?’
Still he was silent, yet he seemed to be basking in the knowledge that she had cared enough to search. And it made Kelly furious. The hurt, the confusion, and the loss she had spent five years overcoming swarmed in on her all over again.
‘Well, think again, boyo. You may have enjoyed running off to the other side of the country and reinventing yourself into this!’ She flicked a hand around the cool apartment. ‘But I was left here to face my family and try to explain why the man I had spent my life defending had done the very thing they had always warned me he would do.’
The warmth in Simon’s eyes switched to a burning flame. ‘I bet they relished the fact.’
Kelly jumped to her feet and slammed her hands on the table.
‘Of course they did! You proved them right. What about proving me right? What about proving yourself right?’
‘I think I have done that, don’t you?’
‘No. Unless all this is some sort of charade, you have sold out. But somehow I don’t think it is. I would put money on the fact you would have more suits in your closet than old jeans, and if so you have become what they wanted you to be. Not what I loved you for being.’ Her voice finally cracked. The cool Kelly act was fast coming apart at the seams.
Simon slid to his feet and was around her side of the table in a second. His hands taking a tight hold on her upper arms were the only things keeping her upright.
She wished he would stop looking at her like that. As if he was so sure he was right. As if he had all the answers and all she had to do was surrender to them. His beautiful hazel eyes burned deep into her mind.
‘I have become what you always knew I would be, Kelly. I am wealthy. I am successful. Just as you always predicted.’
And then she realised he was only centimetres away. Not the miles and miles he had been for so very long. Centimetres could so easily become millimetres and then she would be enfolded in his strong arms. But she knew, from his fervid objection to what she had become, if he even sensed what she was feeling he would be appalled by the very thought.
It is all just an echo, she reminded herself, an echo of bygone desire. A mirage, a shimmering memory that belongs where it came from. In the past. He is here to ease his own guilt, no other reason.
Kelly’s strength returned and she pulled away, rubbing away the tingle in her arms where he had held her. Her head swam. She had to get away. Away from the stifling apartment. Away from him.
‘No, Simon, you are wrong. What I wanted was for you to do whatever you felt you had to do, but with me at your side. But that is all water under the bridge now. Now I want a divorce. I’ll send you the papers.’
She turned and walked to the front door, her legs all but turning to jelly beneath her. As
