Pepper is really sick,” Emma said, and it brought Lacey back to the present problem.
“Yes, she is.”
“But Mr. Gabe is going to take her to the doctor and the doctor will make her all better.”
Lacey tightened her arms around Emma. “I talked to Gabe, and Pepper is not going to get better.”
Emma looked up at her. “Why not?”
Lacey swallowed and glanced toward the ceiling. I could use a little help here.
“Why, Lacey?”
“Because like you said, Pepper is really sick. She...she has cancer.”
Emma’s eyes rounded. “Like Daddy had?”
Their father had died of prostate cancer, which he had let go on too long. Taking care of Mona and Emma, he’d neglected his own health. The doctors had operated, but it had been too late. The cancer had spread.
“There are all kinds of cancer. I’m not sure what kind Pepper has, but it’s bad.”
“Is she going to die?”
The book in Lacey’s head was closed, and there wasn’t any reason to flip through it, because there was no answer. She’d read so many books about death and grief, and she still didn’t have the answer or the words to make the pain better. The person just had to deal with it. That was the really hard part, especially for a child.
She looked into Emma’s troubled green eyes. “Yes, Pepper is going to die.”
“No.” Emma buried her face in Lacey’s chest and cried. All Lacey could do was hold her and pray for the right words. Loud sobs racked Emma’s little body, and Lacey’s eyes filled with tears as she waited for the cries to subside.
She rubbed Emma’s back. “Pepper is in a lot of pain.”
Emma raised her head, wiping away tears. “I know. She shakes.”
Lacey drew in a deep breath. “Gabe is going to take her to a doctor, but he won’t be bringing her back.”
Emma’s eyes rounded even more. “Is the doctor going to put her to sleep?”
Lacey was startled at the question. She’d had no idea Emma knew about such things. “How did you know that?”
“Last year, Jimmy’s cousin’s dog had to be put to sleep. He was real sick, too. Jimmy said the doctor took away his pain and now he’s in heaven.”
Thank you. She glanced briefly toward the ceiling.
“That’s what the vet is going to do for Pepper.”
“Then he’ll go to heaven and be with Zack?”
Lacey squeezed her sister, amazed at her insight. “Yes, sweetie. Pepper will go and be with Zack now.”
“I have to say goodbye.” Emma began to scramble from her lap, but Lacey caught her.
“Not today. Gabe is taking this really bad, so we have to let him have his privacy. Please understand that, Emma.”
Emma twisted her hands. “But...”
“You have school tomorrow, and when you get home you can spend time with Pepper and say goodbye. Gabe said you could.”
“’Kay.” Emma leaned against her and Lacey just held her as they both came to grips with the situation.
They ate dinner in silence, and then Lacey got Emma’s clothes and backpack ready for school the following day. Then they settled in to watch some TV, but Lacey’s thoughts were with the man next door. He really didn’t need to be alone. If she went over there, she felt sure her visit would be met with a big scowl. She would take baby steps with Gabe. In the days ahead she would make sure he wasn’t alone.
* * *
THE NEXT MORNING on the way to school Emma said, “Don’t be late today.”
“I’m never late,” Lacey replied as she pulled into the parking lot of the Horseshoe school. Since the town was small, grades one through twelve were housed in one big building shaped like a horseshoe. There were portable buildings to the side for pre-K and kindergarten. A gym and cafeteria were situated at the end of the horseshoe. The metal buildings with the half-brick front had been there for years. Green shrubs enhanced the front. In the spring, colorful flowers would be blooming in the flowerbeds, planted by the agriculture teacher, Mr. Schuldt.
Kids ran to the front door so they could make it to their classrooms before the bell rang. Emma climbed out and so did Lacey.
“Be good today and be nice to your playmates.” She kissed her sister.
Emma fidgeted.
“Everything will be fine. I’ll be here early if that will make you feel better.”
“’Kay. Love you.” Emma followed the children into the school, her black-and-purple backpack flopping on her back.
Lacey got in the car and drove home, hoping Emma wouldn’t dwell on Pepper too much today. She seemed to be okay with what was happening, and Lacey wanted it to stay that way.
As she pulled into her driveway, she noticed everything was quiet at Gabe’s. No banging or sounds anywhere, which was unusual. He was usually outside by now working on something.
She made her way into her house, put her purse on the table and walked over to his deck. He wasn’t there. She knocked and got no answer. Everything was quiet inside. Where was he?
She went back to her house and across the yard to his front door. Again, she got no answer. She knew she was trespassing, but she didn’t care. Her only thought was of Gabe and his mental state. Without thinking it to death, she opened the double gates by the garage. That was when she heard the sound. A saw or a drill. She didn’t know which, but Gabe was working in his garage.
When she tried the garage’s side door, it opened easily and the sound was much louder. She stepped inside and saw Gabe working on a large box. Was that a coffin? Yes, there was no mistaking it. He’d made a coffin for Pepper. Her chest ached at the sadness of it all.
He turned off the sander and set it on the floor. As he did, he noticed her. She expected him to be startled or surprised, but he was neither. He just went back to working on the box.
Walking closer, she said, “I knocked, but you didn’t answer.”
He rubbed the plywood with a rag. “Did you want something?”
She curled her hands into fists. He was acting as if they hadn’t talked yesterday, as if they hadn’t shared something special, as if he wanted her out of his garage. That wasn’t happening. He was putting up every defense he could to keep her away so he could keep feeling the pain. That wasn’t happening, either.
“You’ve made a coffin for Pepper.”
“Yes. I’m not just
