he still looked so incredibly strong. She had almost convinced herself that she’d only thought he was because she herself had been feeling so wobbly and weak at the time. But now she knew better.
“I didn’t know you would be here,” he said abruptly, the words coming out in a rush.
She took another quick, steadying breath to be sure her voice would come out normally.
“And I didn’t know the project coordinator would be you. Although I suppose I should have,” she added honestly.
Only after she’d spoken did the implication of his first words sink in. I didn’t know you would be here. Meaning what? That if he had, he wouldn’t have come? Would have made them send someone else? Had she embarrassed him that much, made him feel so awkward he would actually let it get in the way of his work? The thought made her so hideously self-conscious that she scrambled to fill the silence.
“I wanted to tell you—the project coordinator, I mean, that the school is really wonderful. You did an excellent job planning the modernization.”
He blinked once, his brows furrowed slightly, then he seemed to relax. So he had felt awkward, she thought. No doubt he was glad she’d brought up something so…safe.
“Keeping your family with you is one of the perks of working for Redstone.”
“So I’ve been told,” she said. Phil had never wanted to avail himself of that option.
But she also knew from the staff—whenever they weren’t talking about the problems brewing in nearby Arethusa—that the staff housing and the school were directly overseen by the coordinator. “But I know the coordinator made several changes and additions to the school plans, and they’ve worked out very well for the children.”
His mouth quirked at one corner. “I figured the indoor plumbing would be a hit.”
Paige blushed, wondering if he was inwardly laughing at her. Perhaps he always had been. Poor, new widow, throwing herself at the first man who tried to comfort her. Maybe that’s all she was to him, a slightly embarrassing, mostly pitiful memory. She couldn’t blame him for that. It’s how she thought of herself back then, too. But she was stronger now. Much stronger. He’d no longer find much trace of the wobbly, uncertain woman she’d been in those days after Phil’s death.
“I had more in mind the computer center,” she said, making her voice match her more determined thoughts. “The kids are already using it, even ones who’ve never seen a computer before.”
One dark brow lowered, as if at the new intonation in her words. “I’m glad to hear that. There was some…discussion over the extra construction it took for the wiring.”
She read between the lines and said, “Thank you for fighting for it, then.”
He shrugged. “Wasn’t much of a fight. They knew if it got all the way to Josh, he’d approve it.” His forehead creased. “Is your son with you?”
“Yes and no,” Paige said wryly, then regretted the words. Her problems with Kyle weren’t something she wanted to discuss, least of all with this man.
“Does that mean he’s here physically but not mentally?”
“Exactly,” she said, surprised he’d gotten her meaning so quickly. “He’s not happy with me for making him leave L.A.”
Rider scanned the lovely vista before them, inviting pathways through gently waving palm trees, stretching down to a pristine white beach.
“One man’s paradise is another man’s hell,” he said softly.
He’d surprised her again. “And L.A. was this mother’s hell,” she said, her voice rather sharp. “Kyle was headed for serious trouble, and I was not going to let it happen.”
His gaze snapped back to her. “He never came around? After he found out…?”
He paused, clearly uncomfortable. She’d been so focused on the stupid things she’d done, she’d forgotten Rider had met Kyle, however briefly, in the days he’d been with her after the crash. And that his concern had stretched to both of them. Perhaps if she’d been more aware of that, she would have seen that he’d merely been being kind, not sending an invitation to the widow.
And suddenly she knew she couldn’t go on like this. If she were to get through the time he would be here, she couldn’t handle the strain of either trying to dodge him or feeling this horrible knot in her stomach every time she saw him. Not on top of dealing with Kyle and keeping up with her students.
She bit her lip, not knowing how to say it, then finally just blurted it out. “Could we talk?”
His brows furrowed for a split second, in what she thought was a flinch. “Is that talk with a capital T?”
The woman she’d once been might have given up. Might have ignored the elephant in the kitchen, hoping it would magically vanish, as she had done with too much else. The woman she was trying to be would not.
“Let’s just say—” she looked around at the people who had exited the meeting and were now milling about, some glancing their way “—that I don’t want to do it here.”
“Paige, is this necessary?”
She hadn’t really considered that this might be as distasteful to him as to her. He’d probably managed to forget all about that night, until he’d walked into that meeting and seen her, the painful reminder.
It would be better for both of them, she thought. She was sure of that. “It’s necessary for me,” she insisted.
He let out an audible breath. “All right. I’ve got meetings the rest of the day. What about dinner?”
She frowned; that sounded too much like a social occasion, and while this wasn’t really business—except the unfinished, personal kind—she didn’t feel comfortable with the implications of a formal dinner engagement.
“I’m sorry,” he said stiffly when she didn’t answer. “I should have realized you wouldn’t want to do that. Later this evening then?”
“Fine,” she said, wondering why he suddenly sounded so odd.
He appeared to be thinking for a moment. “The overlook?”
The deck built out over the steepest slope down to the beach would most likely be private enough. And convenient, she thought sourly, if she decided to jump off.
“Fine,” she repeated. “You just got here, do you know where it is?”
“Theoretically, from the plans. I need to check it out in person, anyway.”
He sounded more natural now, but still stiffer than before. Dreading this, she assumed. “It won’t take long,” she assured him. “Eight?”
“Fine.” He echoed her acceptance.
“All right.” She became suddenly aware that several of the people from the meeting were still lingering, and she realized they must be waiting for him. “I’d better go. People are waiting to
