her car while Paula sat and pondered the rash decision she’d wanted to make. Since moving from her mother’s home and being on her own, she’d only lived in an apartment or flat, and though she liked the possibility of owning a home, it tied her down and forced her into a commitment to stay there. Still, since coming to Ferndale, she’d wanted a place to call home, a real home, and she liked the idea of being around Clint. He’d lingered in her mind no matter how much she tried to push him out. She hoped they could become friends.
His tender smile washed over her, the crinkles around his eyes, the few silvery strands that highlighted his dark hair, the flex of his strong arms as he moved. Her past relationships broke into her thoughts and she blocked the images. Men appeared in and out of her life with no heart and no depth. She’d begun to think most men were like that. Her father had been, as far as she knew. He’d walked out on them, apparently with no looking back. Vic had kept the apartment and sent her packing. But Devon and Clint, even her uncle Fred, proved that some men were different. Some had the capacity to care and love...really love.
That had been her problem. She’d made rotten decisions because she wanted to be loved and had no idea how to make it happen.
And it never did.
* * *
Clint parked on the street and made his way to Devon’s front door. Before he rang the bell, the door opened, and Ashley greeted him. “Good timing. I just put out some appetizers.” She motioned him inside. “We’ll order pizza a little later.”
“Sounds great.” He stepped through the door, his gaze sweeping the living room and dining room. He recognized Devon’s brother and a few of the others, but he didn’t see Paula. His breath hitched as he wrestled a frown from his face.
“Make yourself at home.” Ashley swung her arm toward the dining room, where he saw food spread on the table.
Disappointed, he headed toward the appetizers. He’d come to the party, and he’d make the best of it.
“Clint.”
He paused and turned her way.
“Some of the guests are in the backyard. We’ve been blessed with a bit of Indian summer.” She grinned. “Drinks are there, too.”
Hoping she hadn’t seen his reaction, he called a thanks over his shoulder and inspected the hors d’oeuvres, his stomach knotted with anticipation. He slipped some veggies and dip onto a paper plate, took a couple of taco chips and guacamole and pushed open the backdoor, trying to focus on getting a cola. But the bluff ended there. His true purpose was to see Paula.
And he saw her when he stepped outside. She sat in a canvas folding chair, the sun glinting streaks of gold in her hair, today the color of caramel. Beside her, he recognized one of Ashley’s friends, and he hesitated to interrupt. Instead, he found the cooler loaded with soft drinks and, on the picnic table, he spotted pitchers of iced tea and lemonade and made his decision.
While he scooped ice cubes into a plastic cup, his gaze swept the guests, hoping to spot a firefighter or someone else he knew. But no one passed by that he’d consider a friend. Maybe he’d missed someone inside.
As he reached for the lemonade pitcher, a piping voice calling his name stopped him. When he turned, he saw Kaylee bounding toward him with Joey on her heels. He set down his glass and shifted his attention to the little girl. Her arms stretched upward, and he grasped her, spinning her around while avoiding wiping out the table.
She giggled, and noting Joey’s envious look, he set her on the ground and crouched beside the two cute kids. “How you doing, slugger?” He tousled Joey’s head and gave him a squeeze.
“Good.” Joey’s loving grin sank into his heart. “Kaylee’s my sister now.”
She giggled and put her arm around his back. “He lives in Daddy’s house and not down the street.”
“I heard, and I saw you both at the wedding. You looked so beautiful, Kaylee, and Joey, I’ve never seen anyone more handsome in a tuxedo.”
The boy’s face beamed. “Handsome like my new daddy.”
“Exactly.” He hated to dismiss the kids. Their loving nature stretched his heart and made him yearn for the same kind of joy, watching his own little boy or girl—maybe both or more—grow up to be adults he could be proud of, but that joy hadn’t happened. He didn’t know if it ever would. His attention slipped to Paula before he managed to refocus.
“Joey. Kaylee.” Ashley’s voice drew nearer. “You’re supposed to grab something to drink and then go back inside and play the game you set up.”
Hangdog looks spread across their faces.
Ashley patted their heads. “Your auntie Neely isn’t going to stay long, and she’s—”
“’Cuz of her big belly with the baby.”
Kaylee’s information caused Ashley and him to muzzle their chuckles. Clint gave Ashley a wink and both kids a hug before they did as they were told.
She moved on, and before he finished pouring his drink, the woman Paula had been talking with passed by, and he noticed Paula alone, an empty chair beside her. He grasped the paper plate in one hand, his drink in the other, and ambled her way, hoping she looked pleased when she saw him. His wish came true.
“Do you mind?” He tilted his head toward the chair.
“Not at all.” She moved an unsteady folding tray closer to his chair. “It’s been a while.”
Too long, as far as he was concerned. “It has been.” He settled into the chair.
“I noticed you over there with the kids.” She swung her hand in the direction of the drinks table.
He loved that she’d noticed him. “They told me they’re brother and sister now. They were glowing. Great it hasn’t been a problem.”
“Ashley and Devon did a good job preparing them.” She fell into silence.
He joined her, remaining silent for a moment until he could respond to her first comment. It had been a while since he’d seen her. It’s not what he wanted, but his lack of confidence with women had taken hold. He braced himself for what he needed to do. Make progress. “I heard through the grapevine—” he shifted his elbow toward Devon heading his way “—you might buy Ashley’s house.”
“That’s the rumor.” She grinned but said no more.
Before they could continue, Devon stuck out his hand for a shake. “Glad you made it. I invited a couple of guys from the station, but they’re not here yet.” He winked at Paula. “I can tell that’s no problem since you know this lady. You see the crew all the time.” Devon chuckled. “And she’s better-looking.”
Being subtle was not Devon’s forte. Even without his friend’s encouragement and his attempt to monitor his emotions, Clint’s heart responded. “Absolutely.” He managed a smile that he hoped looked natural. Being relaxed with a woman, especially one he liked, escaped him. It seemed harder work than double shift at the station.
“I’ll let you two enjoy your conversation.” Devon gave Clint’s shoulder a squeeze, winked at Paula and turned
