simply cruel. You’re unhappy with my so-called lack of cooperation, so you’re taking away the things that mean the most to me.”
“You sound suspicious of my motives.”
She considered that. “You may well think you’re doing this for my benefit, but the result is the same.”
“And the result would be?”
“Let’s stop dancing around. I’m not going to improve if I spend my whole time butting heads with you. I’m willing to stay, but I want to be able to have visitors and art supplies.”
“Supplies you can’t see.”
“I see pictures in my head as clearly as I ever did.”
“Tell me about them.”
She considered that, too. “Not until I can trust you to hold up your end of the bargain.”
He gave a dry laugh. “Oh, so it’s a bargain, is it? Is that how your life works, Julia? You withhold favors until you get what you want?”
“A healthy person doesn’t give too much without the confidence she’ll get something in return. I’m asking for simple things anyone else would take for granted.”
“It’s difficult to tell exactly what you had in mind when you were drawing. I’m sure it would be clearer if you could see, or if you’d had better tools. But I think I’m looking at a landscape of some sort. Hills? Perhaps a stream?”
“I don’t think we’ve reached a decision.”
She thought he sighed. “I’ll have to give this some thought.”
She heard the scrape of a chair, as if he was standing up. She ventured one parting shot. “Dr. Jeffers, let’s face the fact that this might not be the best place for me. If we can’t come to an understanding, then I’ll check myself out. No hard feelings.”
“I’m not sure I can let you do that.”
She was taken aback. “I admitted myself voluntarily. You’d have trouble painting a blind woman as a threat to anyone.”
“You might well be dangerous to yourself, as that stunt last night proved. I’m surprised you didn’t burn down my clinic.”
A touch of panic gripped her, an old friend by now. “The fire was out and I was careful.”
“But what comes next? I think you’re seriously depressed and capable of acting out. A bad combination.”
Oddly, instead of anger she experienced a surge of relief, which pruned the panic at its roots. Now she knew what she had to do. “I think we’re done here.”
He was silent, and she wished she could see his expression. When he did speak, he was farther away, at the door, she guessed. “You have an appointment this morning with our internist.”
“I had a physical at the hospital.”
“Will you argue about this, too? We like to be thorough. Then you and I have an appointment at four-thirty. I’ll see you, then.”
She wouldn’t see him. She would be gone by then. Any ambivalence she’d had about leaving had disappeared in the wake of his threats.
At three o’clock Julia heard Jake’s pickup. By three-fifteen she knew Maisy had run into trouble, because she still hadn’t arrived at Julia’s door. Julia rang for Karen and waited impatiently until the young nurse came to her room.
“Karen, my mother’s here again to visit. Would you find out what’s keeping her?”
Karen sounded unhappy. “They aren’t going to let her up here to see you, Mrs. Warwick. Dr. Jeffers says it runs counter to your treatment plan. Security has orders. I’m sorry.”
“Is she still here?”
Karen hesitated, then she lowered her voice. “I’ll find out. Do you want me to give her a message?”
“Yes, tell her to wait for me.”
“Wait?”
Julia was on her feet. “I’m coming down. I’m going home. This is outrageous.”
“But you can’t do that. You signed yourself in.”
“I’ll sign myself out. And I’m going to do it right this minute, so don’t ask me to wait.”
“Dr. Jeffers isn’t here to—”
“Good.”
“But we can’t take you down there. We have orders—”
“Damn it, I’ll find my own way, then. And if I break my neck while I’m at it, my mother can sue Gandy Willson.” Julia started toward the door. She felt her way past the desk and dresser before she bumped into Karen.
Now Karen was pleading. “You’re going to get us in real trouble.”
Julia hesitated a moment; then she shook her head. “I’m sorry. Just tell Jeffers the truth. You tried to reason with me. I refused to listen. I am refusing, that’s no lie.”
“Let me call him.”
“Do whatever you want. But he can’t get back before I leave.”
“Let me talk to your husband.”
“Good luck. He doesn’t listen very well.”
Karen’s voice caught. “Please, don’t do this. Wait until—”
Julia was a small woman, but she drew herself up to her full height. “Please get out of my way.”
“But you’re going to get hurt,” Karen wailed.
“I hope you’ve moved.” Julia started forward, feeling for the doorway. She brushed Karen as she wiggled through.
In the hallway now, she realized how disoriented she was. There was an elevator by the nurses’ station, but she remembered being told that operation depended on a key. Dr. Jeffers had apologized for not having any vacant rooms on the first floor, which were state-of-the-art and handicapped accessible. He had promised her the first one that became available. At the time it hadn’t mattered. Now she realized how convenient this was for him. She was a prisoner of her own sightlessness. She was going to have to navigate the stairs alone.
“I don’t suppose you’ll tell me which way to go?”
“I can’t,” Karen said clearly. In a much lower voice she said, “Are you absolutely determined?”
“I’m leaving.”
She lowered her voice still more. “Go right. At the end, go left. The stairs are on your right, at the very end of that corridor. I’ll meet you there.”
Julia
